After my husband locked him in the closet he told me (the kid) that he has been getting the same treatment since he was seven. I didn't believe him, cussed him out and told my husband... then realized it was true and divorced my husband, pressing charges. The only problem is, my son ran away, and all the police are willnig to do is file a police report because he's 17. I've called all his favorite places and done just about everything I can. I've even gone neighberhood searching. Where should I START?
2007-01-12 05:21:27 · 12 answers · asked by Umm Me 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
My husband locked him in the closet. I've searched everyhwere for him and have filed a police report but they arent taking me very seriously.
I question my ability to parent too
2007-01-12 05:28:03 · update #1
Now is not a time to be harsh, from what I am understanding here your son has run away because you cussed him out after he said your husband had been locking him in a closet for punishment.
First of all you need to be looking for him, but I think you are really looking for someone to comfort you because you understand at this point the likelyhood of you finding him unless he wants to be found is slim to none.
We all make mistakes and you should keep trying to look for him and when you do find him apologize for cussing him out and not beleiving him. The bond between mother and child is very strong and if you sencerely mean what you say he will know, but you also show with your actions. If he ends up coming home on his on, welcome him with open arms but kind of let him call the shots with the conversation by letting him let you know when he is ready to be apologized to. He may still be angry a bit when he returns and this could spark another arguement if not handled right.
I am certain though that he will come home. Many of us who experiance this type of trama or hollaring out for help, and I am sure that is what he is up to as well. At 17 he wants to be an adult but he also needs your mothering still.
2007-01-12 05:38:52 · answer #1 · answered by trhwsh 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is still in school. Start there. He's probably staying w/someone he knows. Just ask all of his friends and give them all your number. Tell them to call you if they at least see him. That way you know he is ok. Maybe they can help convince him that going home would be the best thing. You have to remember what it's like to be 17. The whole world is against you. NO ONE understands you and everything no matter how small (in your case it's not that small) is a huge deal.
When you do talk to him all you have to do is tell him how much you love him and admit that you were wrong. NO cussing or asking him a million questions. When he is at home and feels secure again you can ask all the questions you want.
Just try to think like a teenager again.
2007-01-12 05:31:55 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Police will not help in locating a young adult his age if he left on his own free will, they only do so if a missing person under ?able circumstances. He'll decide if he wants to come home or not until he does there is nothing you can do. Perhaps talk with one of his friends to see if a meeting can be arranged in a neutral location between you and your son. Your son has every right to leave a crappy home situation. 17 is way to late to deal with this problem now should have been years ago. Your son just left he did not run away.
2007-01-12 05:36:34 · answer #3 · answered by badmikey4 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's been getting locked in the closet since he was seven and you never knew or did anything about it? He probably feels he has no one to turn to or count on. There's nothing to do but wait for him to come back, tell him how sorry you are for not being there for him, and go to counseling together to work it out. And keep your husband away, get a restraining order if you need to.
2007-01-12 05:30:17 · answer #4 · answered by smartypants909 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Start looking in places you won't expect him to be. Look around for people that live away from your neighborhood that knows him, and I guess sit tight he will come back or at least call, and after so many hours the police have to file a missing person report!
2007-01-12 05:25:45 · answer #5 · answered by Tommy's_Sweet_Girl 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ok..let me get this straight..your child came to you for help..and you cuss him out, that is just as bad as him being locked in the closet. Verbal abuse and physical abuse cause the same damage. I can't say I blame him for leaving. Sorry to be harsh but doesn't sound like some place I would want to stay either.
Good Luck to your son, I hope he is just with friends and people that care about him
2007-01-12 05:27:27 · answer #6 · answered by whatelsewhatever 3 · 5⤊ 0⤋
He will come back. Start treating him like more of an adult! why would you lock him in a closet at 17??? i seriously question your ability to be a parent~~!!!
2007-01-12 06:23:33 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start looking and tell the police to get serious
2007-01-12 09:45:31 · answer #8 · answered by Zack 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He will come back. Start treating him like more of an adult! why would you lock him in a closet at 17??? i seriously question your ability to be a parent~~!!!
2007-01-12 05:25:11 · answer #9 · answered by _DestroyingAngel_ 3 · 3⤊ 4⤋
call his friend and why are you looking online for Answers? Lady, go out and look for him!
2007-01-12 05:25:36 · answer #10 · answered by howardlee1977 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋