parents only please:?

Question

when your children deliberately disobey you or your husband (their father) how do you go about handling it...me and my husband are at whitts end and have no more solutions/options in need of help....

Answer 1

Follow through with what ever it is that you said that you were going to do. If they don't clean up their toys, tell them you are going to take away something for 2 days and then do it. Don't cave in. That might help.

Answer 2

First of all, I am so sorry you are having trouble, I know the feeling. My son is seven though, It would help to know how old your child is because then it would be easier to talk effective punishement.

Lets say your child is between the ages of of say five and nine. Any discipline method you use should be consistant, it really does not matter if you spank, time out, or take away a priviledge, the child should expect that same punishment each time. When you see your child doing good behavior praise and yes even reward.

Now if your child is a teen this is going to be more complicated and I am not really the one to give advice being as I only have a seven year old. Someone else will have to pull that rain and I will take notes for later use. Good luck.

Answer 3

It is called discipline- and that only means putting the child in a "time-out" where they have to sit or be in a place where they can stop, calm down and think about their actions before you will discuss it with them.Depends on the age of the child for how well this will work also. An older child who should know that his parents are in CHARGE can be grounded or take something they enjoy away from them for a period of time and when they can come to you and apologize and admit their actions were wrong then re-instate whatever it was you removed- be it a video game or a sleepover at a friends ect....If you don't do something now the kid will totally grow up to disrespect you and you will end up with more serious trouble!

Answer 4

Well your first mistake is when you yell and scream at them. When they push your buttons, do not show that you are angrey because they will just get a rise out of it. Lock them in there room if they come out, put them back in, the third time take a privalege away. And no matter how much they plead, Do NOT give it back. When they have a tantrum, just sit there and show them that you don't care what they say. After you punish them still act like your mad until they say their sorry. It is sooo important not to raise your voice because that is what they want. Do not hit them because it puts a bad image in there head. If you ask them to do something and they refuse, the next ime they ask you to do something... say no and tell them why. Sometime its not the kids it's the parents. maybe you and your husband have not been getting along and agreeing with eachother. If your kid demands something, don't give it to them because they didn't say please. I fthis continues, sometimes it is best to go to a perfesional for some advice on how to resove this, to get eachother's feelings out. Be stern, no yelling and Good luck. Remenmber you are to be the kids parents, not their friends. You are the BOSS. If you don't disipline you kids young, imaaginge what they will be like in five years. Soometimes sending your kid straight to bed with no dinnerworks to. If they refuse to eat there green beans, make them sitt there until it is time to go staght to bed, no fun or other important stuff.

Answer 5

There has to be a clear and concise set of rules and consequences that everyone is aware of. You and your husband (parents) need to be on the same page and follow thru is an absolute must. If you fail to follow thru your child will find the loop hole and make it bigger and bigger until you are once again dealing with anarchy.
You are the parents and you are the law inside your family. The consequences should be age appropriate and infraction appropriate.
You need to take the control back in this house and of your child.

Answer 6

It's simple IF you start off right. YOU ARE THE PARENTS, and they are the kids. YOU ARE THE BOSS, they are not. Be strict and be consistant. It's okay to be mean, you are NOT there to be there friend, you are there to protect them and guide them and lead them, not to take orders from them. first off, when you tell them something, only tell them once and then disapline them if they dont listen. If you're kids are that out of control, take all there toy's away including the TV and computer except for homework and make the EARN IT all back, and then when they misbehave again take it away...again. Less TV, Less computer, less other activities, more family time. Good luck.

Answer 7

We have found that 'negative reinforcement' on misbehavior works really well.
This can range from time-outs to sitting in corner, no TV, no computer, no games, grounded, etc.
Corporal punishment is reserved for something that would physically injure a person.
Get 'em now while they are still young and you will have minimal problems when they get to high school

BTW, don't forget 'positive reinforcement' when they do good without instruction from you.

Answer 8

Depends on the ages, but one universal thing always works for us...take away something they really like. This includes toys, privileges, allowance...whatever it is that they like. Older kids can be grounded. We also like to present them with 2 punishment options, let them choose which one they will serve. If they can't decide within a set time, like 5 minutes, then you choose. End of discussion. Good luck!

Answer 9

Are you crazy?You don't know what to do?Have you seen the Nanny?Those kids are ridiculous!I wish I was their mom.Just like Dr.Phil said on his show:if you don't start early disciplining your children then it will be too late.That is so true.If they do things that they are not suppose to do, pop them on their hand or behind and look then in the eyes when you say NO!NO!.Every time they do something wrong and you continue to do this they will look to see if you're looking and think about it.(This works IF your children are toddlers) but if they are bigger a spankin and punishment for a week will get it.They will miss everything they use to do and will think about disobeying you.

Answer 10

Instead of focusing on what to do to get them to obey you, focus on the reasons why are not obeying in the first place. Whatever you do, do not yell at them because they will tune you out and not listen. Make sure that you explain what you want them to do and why so they don't think you just want to control. That is what causes power stuggles.