I mean I am 14 and have a boyfriend but I have seen kids with them as young as 6! Are we just growing up too fast?!? What is your personal idea on how to prevent this from happening?
2007-01-12 04:41:00 · 10 answers · asked by MaculaMaster 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
I understand if you think that 14 is too young to have a boyfriend but I am not using him for sex or anything. It's just the matter of the teens that DO and they only want them to have sex and be popular. I know that there are some like me that are looking for love. And again if you think that I am too young for love too then I understand.
2007-01-12 04:49:50 · update #1
Whether looking for love or just acceptance your age is normal to want a boyfriend. You are very very wise to choose to wait for sex. You can be proud of that.
Self-esteem (low) has a good bit to do with those who let boys do things, but there are other reasons, obviously.
At 6, that is just too young. A lot of media out there has a lot to do with kids growing up too fast and that is too fast, busy working parents have some to do with it too. plus amny more things. Most problems like this have multiple causes.
You sound like you are pretty together and are realizing you are still a kid and enjoying that.
Your question ,by the way is excellent!
Hope this answers your question.
2007-01-12 05:08:46 · answer #1 · answered by rumbler_12 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no prevention. In the society Americans have created there is no going back, just looking forward.
I don't think it's the idea of a boyfriend/girlfriend that worry people as much as the physical aspects.
I think closer bonds between children and parents, sexual education in public school, and better parental control over media would be a start to solve the physical issues when children are in relationships.
There will always be influences other than our (parents) own in our children's lives. We just have to try our best to surround our kids with the positive ones. You cannot take back TV shows that glorify teenage/young relationships. You cannot change parents who are “okay” with dating at young ages. It’s there and to take it away you’d have to change millions of opinions which is a very hard thing to do.
That’s why I don’t feel there is prevention on a national level. It’s only in the home but sometimes that isn’t enough.
2007-01-12 12:49:52 · answer #2 · answered by .vato. 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
I had a boyfriend at age 5 until I was 6, almost 7. He and his twin sister were my best friends. We didn't really do anything, our "dates" were eating lunch together in the cafeteria, and everyone thought it was so cute!
I think that's ok. At 5 or 6, what are you going to do? I mean, it's just the fun of acting grown up. But at, like, somewhere between 8 or 9 through 12, it's wrong.
2007-01-12 13:01:09 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
It happens because of hormones, Parents not being at schools, teachers not caring ect ect.
I don't think there is anything wrong with having a boyfriend/girlfriend at young ages as long as they keep it at that. It kinda them what to look for in a husband/wife when they are older.
2007-01-12 12:46:04 · answer #4 · answered by angelmwilson 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Because young girls see $luts like Brittany Spears on TV and yes they are growing up too fast. Best way to prevent it is to make separate schools for girls and separate schools for boys and not let girls have male friends .
2007-01-12 15:02:00 · answer #5 · answered by robedzombiesoul 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Listen, I have been there and done that, and I am only 20 married with a kid. The simple fact is that its hormones...yes it sounds crude, and I am not making any excuses for promiscuous teens, but believe me...its the hormones and there is no stopping it
2007-01-12 12:46:00 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are 14, and much too young to have a boyfriend! Why do you need a boyfriend? Aren't you happy with your life? What need does this boyfriend fill?
At 14 girls should be talking with their girlfriends, playing 'what will it be like when....' not actually doing it? What do you have to look forward to now? You are missing out on the teen years that later on you will yearn for. This is the time in your life that you bond with your own sex! Building these bonds will make life easier later in life - for jobs, for parenthood, for friendship. IF you miss them and rely on a boy to be your best buddy, you are cutting yourself off from your own sex. Note that boys are still bonding with their own sex at this age, and keep up with that....those bonds will sustain him thruout his life. Women seem to like to lock themselves out....the glass ceiling - our own doing. Women don't trust other women because they don't have bonds and friendship. Men do and help eachother all the time.
So how do we prevent this from happening? First stop looking at television as a role-model. Life is not as portrayed on television - teens don't always have a boyfriend, the pretty ones don't always win, the smartest don't always get ahead. Teens aren't always thin and beautiful - they are varied in everyway.
Second, look inside yourself and your own family for the love and affection you seek, then to your own sex for fun friendship and compainionship.
And finally stop thinking that life will be better WHEN...you know when I have a boyfriend, when I am out of high school, when I get some money. Life is happening right now, enjoy the stage of your life that you are in, its where you are meant to be.
Added:
Looking for love as you say is normal, as is wanting to fit in. Finding it in a boyfriend is NOT the answer, not at any age. Love yourself first, last and always. If you have good and healthy self-esteem, then having a boyfriend (at 14) is NOT necessary. It is a status symbol of the insecure that want to look like they have it all. Those that are truly happy with themselves do not depend on the opposite sex to acheive that.
Read some biographies of women you admire for their achievements (not pop stars, singers, or movie stars) but women that have truly established themselves in life, you will see the common thread there, they believed in themselves, didn't rely on a boyfriend, and made contacts that have lasted them for a long time.
Women get caught up in this whole image that you need a man to be whole, it is so NOT true. Love yourself!
2007-01-12 13:02:45 · answer #7 · answered by I_Love_Life! 5 · 1⤊ 3⤋
i think u should be aloud to have a bf when u turn 12, but no 1 on 1 dates untill 15... but WOW 6....
2007-01-12 12:47:32 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
14 is too young, if you ask me. dating is for finding a mate. last i checked you had to be 18 to get married. a 14 year old isnt going to get married any time soon, and should be focusing on school and growing up, not dating.
2007-01-12 12:45:11 · answer #9 · answered by amosunknown 7 · 2⤊ 2⤋
it's all about principles, beng focused and setting prioritises. why would a 14yr old like yourself have a boyfriend? it's just too early. enjoy making friends and be single. be young. you have a lot of years ahead of you.
2007-01-12 12:46:43 · answer #10 · answered by kennma 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋