Is there anyone on here that has just moved away?

Question

Ok I have asked before questions about leaving and traveling or moving away from ppl in family and friends but has anyone on here just moved somewhere not knowing a soul and left all family and friends behind? I ask because I need to know if it was done cuz of problems or just cuz u were tired of it all around where u came from? I'm so confused day in and out not knwing what to do? I am so afraid to move than everything backfire than no-one will take me back. I am a grown woman but very undecided about the rest of my life.

Answer 1

I have, sort of ... I at least had a husband with me though. Moved away from my kids, grandkids and parents, into another country. Since the internet is my primary support and social network, and has been for many years as I am disabled and ill, for me it has not been terribly difficult.

However, I will also share with you the experience of several of my adult children who did this.

One of my sons, 24 at the time, moved to another state to go to an art institute, but he was independent, and had to work and support himself as well. He loved it, and had no problems making new friends and establishing himself. He did initially move in with someone he had known previously.

My daughter, 19 at the time, had a different experience. She moved from a tiny town on the west coast to New York City. I had arranged with the daughter of an internet friend of mine for her to room with to start with, and she saved up 4 months worth of expenses in advance. Well, she never was able to get a "real" job, and the roommate situation did not work out. Also, her savings went twice as fast as she had expected. She finally got a job doing childcare, but the parent didn't pay her on time, or as much as was owed, and expected long hours on a low daily rate. The apt she found had a shared bathroom, and had been sublet ... illegally she found out ... and she was forced to move in the middle of the night. Still, she managed to stay there 18 months, before deciding to return home, and is glad she did it.

Now, you have heard the horror stories ... my daughters in part could have been waylaid with better preparation and more education in the ways of large cities and getting things in writing.

I tell you this to give you a worst case scenario .. and show you that even in that case ... she was glad she had taken the risk and done it!

Here are my suggestions to you: Save up $6,000 to $10,000 before you move. This gives you a buffer in case of problems. Research the area you are considering moving to very well, including job opportunities, expected wages, and cost of living. Try to secure a job ahead of time, but be ready in case things fall through.

None of the moves mentioned above were because of problems. Your problems will follow you, you can't run away from them. All were for a new start, a change in scenery, something different.

It's okay to be undecided about the rest of your life. A lot of times it is easier to make decisions based on what you know you DON'T like or want, than it is to figure out what you DO want.

If you have a good savings buffer, if things don't work out for you, you can move back. It does not mean failure, it means a change in circumstances or a change in mind, or simply a matter of discovering that what you thought you wanted wasn't.

And .,.. it just might end up being the best thing you could do! My youngest son moved with me when I moved, and he wasn't sure at first, but it turned out being the best thing ever in his life! (He has since returned, but with a new confidence and sense of self than he ever had before ... his return was because he could not immigrate here).

Don't be afraid to take a chance. Ask yourself .. when my life is over, will I regret more that I tried, or that I didn't?

Answer 2

I moved away from all family and friends 5 years ago to be where I am now. I moved from south carolina to michigan because i was 25 and tired of living at home with family and wanted to start over new in a brand new state. it was rough. my grandmother whom i was living with in south carolina wound up passing away the day after i moved (5 years ago today 1-12-02 rip grandma). it was hard but i've managed to get thru it all. good luck to you if your thinking about doing this. just keep in mind that packing up and moving is a huge step and you should be absolutly certain before doing this.

Answer 3

I have moved a lot, but usually with my parents and brother. I just didn't know anyone at school, all 8 of them. but moving so much has helped me learn how to make friends quickly. when I finally moved away from my parents, I didn't know anyone. (it was from Ohio to Florida) everyone was very friendly and helpful. I could ask for help and they told me where to go or what to do. one of the women where I was going to work helped me find a place to rent. you just have to reach out and ask if you need to know something.