My friend has 2 children with her boyfriend one is a newborn baby and her boyfriend is very abusive he hits her and tells her shes crazy and tells the kids that shes stupid and things. I don't know if he has ever hit the children. She tried to leave him noce but he followed her everywhere, stood outside the playgroups where she was and she eventually got back with him. Is there anything I can do?
2007-01-12 01:16:35 · 15 answers · asked by cigaro19 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
She went to a womens refuge when she left him but he followed her there and would wait round the corner everyday when she went out.
2007-01-12 08:00:33 · update #1
She needs to report the abuse, sooner rather than later. The only thing you can do is to be there for her, to support her and hopefully to persuade her to go and seek the help that she needs. At the end of the day, it has to be her decision and the decision to do something positive must ultimately come from her. You could try talking to her, showing your concerns, not only for her, but for the children as well. There are organisations which can help, she just needs the courage to seek that help. If the children have been abused, then she must report it to the police. The Child Protection Team (CPT) will do everything they can to help and make things easier for her. They are professionals and have the experience. (This is in the U.K.)
2007-01-12 01:26:43 · answer #1 · answered by JillPinky 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
not sure you can actually do anything other than try and subtley wean her off him, the problem is if hes worn her down enough she might not want to go so it jst means youll have to stand by her no matter how hard it gets because when she does leave him she will really need you. in the mean time try asking shelter or any of the domestic violence support schemes for advice in helping her. im sure you can find info on them in doctor surgeries and on the internet, if you find one in your area you can always suggest it to her as an option!?
i so hope you succeed and help her escape, it will be hard but it sounds like she has a wonderful friend in you! good luck! xx
2007-01-12 03:05:42 · answer #2 · answered by pinkjessie 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Be a good friend and find a womens shelter for her. There are groups who help abused women all over the country and they will offer her a safe place to stay and help her get on her feet. The best thing you can do is to offer her your support and help her find a way out. As soon as she leaves she needs to file a restraining order against him. She really needs to get herself and her children out of there.....for her childrens sake and safety. He may or may not be abusing the children, but if they are watching him abuse mommy, that in itself is child abuse and will have an adverse effect on those children. Help your friend get out of this very dangerous situation. Good luck to both of you. You are a good friend to help her.
2007-01-12 02:08:08 · answer #3 · answered by vanhammer 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
is it possible for you to put her up with the kids till she finds somewhere to go....there are shelters that provide accommodation for abused women, he is being a bastard to her and i think she should get out asap...if he keeps following her then tell her to get the police and have an injunction served to him, he's a freak....she has a new born and a 2 year old and he is hitting her in front of them kids...jeez....has she got an older brother that can come over and teach the little coward a lesson, he cannot keep hurting her like that...something has to be done....and she needs to get away from him before he does worse....poor girl....all you can do is be there for her and try help her get away, even if it means she has to take her child from play group
2007-01-12 03:11:18 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to help get your friend away from this man as soon as possible but be very careful how and when you do it.There are places for your friend and children to go like women's refuge.The only way forward for your friend is if she disappears from this man without a trace,does your friend have proof that he hits her like bruises or marks that can be photographed and logged with the police?I know she might not want the police involved but the only way to keep this man out of her life is to get the police involved and they could get an injunction on this man to keep him away.And remember to be there for your friend as she will be counting on your strength and support through this difficult time....good luck.
2007-01-12 02:02:41 · answer #5 · answered by sarah y 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
think the best think for your friend and her children is to leave, has she family that could support her till she find´s somewhere to stay ? the reason he follows her and waits for her is because he is frightened she will report him to the police ,when really she should go to the police and report him . she should do something about this man soon before she find´s herself in a hospital bed and her children taken away from her by the authorities
2007-01-12 02:03:09 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
just keep being there for her, offering support and telling her this kind of behavior in her boyfriend isn't okay. get pamplets from shelters and other literature on abuse in the home and give it to her so she will have numbers and information handy should she need it.
2007-01-12 01:40:15 · answer #7 · answered by ladybug 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Be her friend for sure--let someone know within the boundaries of the law and her family-if something should happen to her--then at least you told people and the finger is pointed at him.
2007-01-12 01:35:58 · answer #8 · answered by smeezleme 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Ring social services and talk to the Duty Social worker about it. They may be able to help you. This is to much emotional worry to keep to your self, without professional help.
2007-01-12 02:22:14 · answer #9 · answered by : 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
You can not help those that will not help themselves, Police are faced with this all the time, person is abused knows where help is but stays in relationship? it's all part of the cycle of abuse, they have to help themselves.
2007-01-12 01:39:25 · answer #10 · answered by yawhosucs 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋