She has dated some guys in the past, one for 3 years, but never mentioned marriage before with them. Now after dating me for barely 3 months she starts mentioning these frequently. Can anybody clue me in on what her deal is? She is 23 and I am 28.
2007-01-12 00:05:52 · 15 answers · asked by Lothario 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
she sounds like a bunny boiler to me. get rid unless you really are interested in marraige so soon
2007-01-12 00:09:19 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me as though she's been thinking about it as she's getting a little older. You don't say how old she was when she was seeing this other guy for 3 years, but if she was a teenager, marriage and kids would not have been on the horizon. She's heading for her mid-twenties and her maternal feelings are starting to appear.
You might want to ask her if it was 'just a question', as I made a similar 'mistake'. I've been seeing this girl for about 2 weeks now, and just as a 'throwaway' I was wondering if she was the kind of girl who wanted kids someday, so I asked her. She looked a bit shocked and then I realised how it must have sounded!!!
I shouldn't read too much into it.
2007-01-12 08:11:51 · answer #2 · answered by prusec_int 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most women are more open about their wishes for the future than men. If you are not on the same path as her and do not feel the same than you need to be honest with her. It would not be fair for her or to you to stay in a relationship with you both going in 2 different directions! It sounds like she really likes you and can see having a future with you. It sounds like she has found a great guy but you need to tell her that you do not feel the same regarding marriage...at least no marriage plans now!
2007-01-12 08:20:21 · answer #3 · answered by September Sweetie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why not ask her? Perhaps something happened or she came to the decision that her goal is to marry and start a family in the not too distant future. She may not be pushing you to do this, but wants to know your view on it in general. If you don't see a wife/kids in your not-too-distant future then she may want to move on to someone who wants those things.
Communicate with her...let her know your feelings on both issues, and if you are ready now (or soon) for those things with a woman who is a good match, or if you don't see those things in your life for years down the road, if ever. And make it clear to her that even if you are open to those things, 3 months isn't long enough to know if you two would be a good long-term match.
2007-01-12 08:22:18 · answer #4 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am always suspect of anyone that mentions love and marriage this early in a relationship. It smacks of desperation and maybe a little instability. I'd back away. Oh, by the way always use protection if you're sleeping together. Don't leave birth control to her. Just a feeling I've got. Be careful and good luck.
2007-01-12 08:17:02 · answer #5 · answered by mjm52 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's normal. However, she should probably keep this to herself. She probably has friends that are getting married and so she likely thinks about it. By 23, women often date to find the person they are going to marry. We analyze your potential as a husband and father from day one. Although we do this... the smarter of the women don't let that be known to the man they are dating.
Good luck buddy!
2007-01-14 02:12:13 · answer #6 · answered by Carrie J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She must really love you and want to be with and commit to you in marriage... This is a good thing but make sure she is the right one for you and you for her.... Yes this is normal for a girl because you have been together for a while for now.
2007-01-12 08:09:35 · answer #7 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So what are your plans wit her~my gosh~let her know up front~do not play her~if u do not want ta marry her then let her know~do not lead her on~just talk ta her~I think the most important things is trust and honesty~wit those two things u can never go wrong~have a great day and let me know~~~taco_momma@hotmail.com~~~~~
2007-01-12 08:10:59 · answer #8 · answered by Jill F 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends on how she's approaching the conversation as to whether or not it's talking about her goals and what she wants to have later in life.
2007-01-12 08:10:06 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe she is in love with you and wants to know how you feel, she wants to know that the relationship has a future, but I doubt she wants you to pop the question yet. Just let her know how you feel.
2007-01-12 08:09:52 · answer #10 · answered by Jessy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she is needing security..... maybe she really likes you and can see herself having a future with you. Take it slow and talk to her and let her know that it's to early for you to think about that right now that you are still getting to know one another.
2007-01-12 08:20:38 · answer #11 · answered by harleychickfatboy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋