my husband is having some issues and i really cant understns but he ask me all the time if i love or how much di i love him and it is driving me nuts he asks this like 5-8 times a day and he is at work for 12 hours so you know that is alot in a short period of time. I was thinking if i dont pay much attention to this he will stop not sure though what could be the problem?
2007-01-11 23:34:45 · 17 answers · asked by faithfullyyours 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Maybe because he's not around or from the way you act with him he feels the relationship is vulnerable to you fooling around. Or maybe he knows something you don't and if you don't do anything to reassure him or to simply let him know he means something to you (and by that I mean DO something not just say it) his only way to try and deal with it is reassurance from you. Which as it sounds is an inconvenience for you. Perhaps if you said it without him asking he'd stop asking.
If the shoe was on the other foot and you needed something and your husband failed to respond how would you feel? Or better yet if he didn't ask how you felt about him at all. He's working 12 hours a day and thinking about YOU. What are you doing to appreciate what he does? Maybe you should ask yourself if there is anything you could be doing or NOT doing that is creating this situation. It didn't come out of a vacuum.
What you should do is sit him down tell him how you feel and ASK him why he feels so afraid.
2007-01-12 00:00:01 · answer #1 · answered by Cybrocupid 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Something in your relationship has changed that has him feeling insecure. It may be something that seems minor and insignificant to you but a major deal to him. If you can't pin point what the change might be, ask him. That is the only way to correct the issue.
I have been married 17 years and still tell my husband repeatedly that I love him. I end every phone conversation with I love you, the last thing I say before going to sleep and first thing I say when I wake up is I love you. Include thank you often too it will help!
2007-01-12 09:18:41 · answer #2 · answered by T 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It could be many different things, but I would off the top of my head say he has a security problem. It isn't anything you've done, is it? Sometimes a person isn't secure in themselves, and it will come out in this way. Now, to address the work issue- being away from your spouse can take a toll on any relationship. Whatever time the two of you can get together, then BE together. Alone. Trust me, I've seen alot of marriages and relationships destroyed because an employer treats employees like paid slaves, demanding their time. Take care.
2007-01-12 07:48:01 · answer #3 · answered by Jed 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, don't ignore it. Saying those three words, at least once a day, is very important. He works away from you for 12 hours a day and needs reassurance. What would happen if he stopped saying that to you? Sure, you would might think, "Oh, thank God!" But, in the back of your mind...you would really wonder and possibly start to worry.
I understand that the amount of "I love yous" might possibly lessen their meaning...but, apparently he adores you more than anyone else. Count yourself lucky...he more than likely will abate as time goes on....you might want to initiate the "I love yous" every once in a while...and in different and creative ways.
2007-01-12 07:43:13 · answer #4 · answered by What, what, what?? 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he needs reassurance. Instead of waiting for him to call and ask, make a point of waking up in the morning, rolling over and saying, "Honey, I love you!" Call him during the day for no reason just to say you love him...and do things that make him believe that it's true - like buy him chocolates, or a gift just because, or give him great fully body massages. Then maybe the constant questions about it will stop.
2007-01-12 07:43:22 · answer #5 · answered by Rachel 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your husband is insecure and obviously needs the reassurance. Give it to him, but at the same time tell him that all those questions make you wonder whether he trusts you or not.
God bless and you will come out fine.
2007-01-12 07:56:21 · answer #6 · answered by Cyrill sneer 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is feeling insecure it seems like,he may not have any confidence in your marriage. Ignoring it won't solve anything try buying him a card and writing him a note inside, and when he starts feeling that way he can always read what you wrote.
2007-01-12 07:55:24 · answer #7 · answered by Denny O 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I did this to my husband to some degree when we were first married. I think I was just suffering from low self-esteem. My husband finally started giving me cards with "I love you" on them and it made a big difference.
2007-01-12 07:39:51 · answer #8 · answered by Wendy 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Tell him to stop asking you the same thing over and over again, tell him that the word LOVE losses it's special meaning if it's forced out of you. You can always make a BIG BANNER and write on it in big bright letters:
"YES YES YES I LOVE MY AMAZING HUSBAND!!!"
And just point to it every time he asks.
2007-01-12 07:47:54 · answer #9 · answered by artist-oranit.com. 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Either ask him whats will all the "do you love me questions", see what he says. Or, maybe for a short time, you could send "I love you" emails, notes and just say it a bit and see how what happens.
2007-01-12 07:40:15 · answer #10 · answered by bluechick 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋