We live across the country from each other, and we can't seems to stop aruging. My son has many medical needs which I take care of. My son is 7 years old and every time he asks to call his dad I ALWAYS let him. His dad NEVER, and I mean not even once, has ever called him. He says he loves his son, wants to talk to him, wants to be a part of his life ect. I have sole physical custody and joint legal. I have to by law tell him about the medical procedures, IF he objects to the methods of treatment we have to go to court. Luckly he leaves ALL the important decisions up to me. I don't understand why we have to argue. He won't send the stuff to him because he says I stole his son from him when I left him 9 months ago and took our son. I did have valid reasons though. My son is getting the medical care that he didn't get there. I even told his dad if he would just send 4 boxes I would give him MY car that he is driving. He can come visit his son if he wants to. I just wants my sons things.
2007-01-11 16:33:59 · 3 answers · asked by Diana W 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Don't give him your car! He isn't reasonable at all. He's acting like a selfish 2 year old. You go get your sons things, or ask someone you trust to pack them and send them to you. You pay them for the favor. Forget about him and concentrate on your son. You obviously can't depend on him. You are a good mother and take great care of your son, his father needs to grow up.Good luck and God Bless, I hope your son gets better soon.
2007-01-11 16:46:07 · answer #1 · answered by mamabear 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your son has more than medical problems he has severe emotional problems because his dad moved across the country away from him, his family is destroyed and there does not appear to be any counselling for yourself and your son to work through the abandonment issues.
Your x-husband feels abandoned also therefore his unreasonableness. You made the choice to leave and now you must do the work to repair the relationship in its new mode for the sake of your son. Just as there is no 50/50 in marriage more often 90/10 on the give and take scale the same applies to divorce.
Apologize to him for not being able to be what he needed and remind him the son was the wonderful thing the marriage created and he will only grow into a wonderful man if the two of you put his happiness in front of your own. This may open some communication. Have your son call his Dad at least (repeat, at least) once a week without him having to ask to call so that you open the communication for them. Their relationship is as important as yours with your son. A 7 year old needs guidance and he should not have to ask to speak to his father. If dad does not call then you call dad because later you will see the more you put into a relationship or whatever the better the end result. This is about your son, not about you and your x-husband.
2007-01-12 00:47:07 · answer #2 · answered by Jeanne 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How can you be civil? Keep putting your son's needs first. Your son needs to know that his is the best Dad for him and that his DAd loves him. No matter how aggravated you get with the Dad, remember:
your son is created 1/2 from his father...and he therefore feels less secure in himself if he ever feels something is wrong with his Dad.
Please be civil to the Dad. Everyone wins. He will come around and give you the boxes. He will call more. You are all going through some major transitions.
Good Luck,
CF
2007-01-12 00:43:22 · answer #3 · answered by Crispy_Frog 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋