I have been with my boyfriend for 5 years. We've lived together for 4 years and have a baby together. A few months ago we decided to sleep in separate bedrooms because of his excessive snoring. We haven't had sex in about 4 months. He got a promotion around that time, which increased his work load, and he says that he is just extremely tired and is feeling total burn out. He is 48 years old.
Out of curiosity I went online and found a list of 35 signs of a cheating spouse. 20 out of the 35 applied to him so now I'm left wondering....is he cheating? I don't have "that feeling" that says he is cheating, but how can I be sure?
I confronted him on this and he, of course, said that he's not cheating and has never cheated on me. How can I find out if this is true? I am a stay at home mom so I can't afford an investigator. His phone bill (company phone), bank and credit card statements have always been sent to his office, even before I met him. Any ideas or suggestions?
2007-01-11 15:58:19 · 4 answers · asked by Wendy 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Ask him if he's cheating one more time. If he laughs or looks or to the side (but not at you) when he says that he's not cheating, he's lying. There are other signs of lying, but you will probably know. Like if he gives you a hard stare like he's trying not to be obvious, or his lips quiver.
If you think he's telling the truth, don't make yourself crazy over it, just let it go.
This book is great if you can't figure it out
http://www.amazon.com/Never-Lied-Again-Conversation-Situation/dp/0312186347
2007-01-11 16:37:19 · answer #1 · answered by Anne 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe your boyfriend is just tired.....and the snoring thing I can relate to. Many people don't sleep in the same bed due to snoring. It doesn't mean they don't love each other, or are having an affair.
Why not show up at your boyfriend's office when he's not expecting you and perhpas you can go to lunch with him?
Just a thought. Also, I would wonder why you guys aren't getting married, especially since you have a child together? Just wondering. If he afraid of commitment?
If you really truly suspect he is cheating then be your own detective and follow him. It is kind of weird that all of his bills and things are sent to his office and not your home. I would try to get those and look at them.
Good luck.
2007-01-11 16:10:28 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The easiest way to know for sure is to give him every reason NOT to.
I'm not just saying this because I'm male, I genuinely mean that if your man is happy with you and your relationship, he has no reason other than mental defect, to cheat.
Don't sleep in a different room. Hell, my wife snores like a bear, but I've actually gotten to where I don't sleep as well when I'm on the road because I don't have her snoring next to me.
Make time to have sex on his terms. You're at home all day. So when he gets home he's tired or whatever, leave him alone then. Start examining times that are good for him, and work on setting up those situations. Sex is extremely important ... it feeds a carnal desire in both men and women, but especially men.
Make sure he's happy with what you're doing at home as far as cooking, cleaning, etc. Now, my wife works full time so I help her with housework and stuff. But even she says that if she could stay home all day, I'd never have to lift a finger because she'd already have it done.
In the end, if you're making him as happy as he can be, he'll have no reason to cheat, and EVERY reason to make sure that you're as happy as you can be too.
2007-01-11 16:08:20 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
no
2007-01-11 16:07:44 · answer #4 · answered by Patrick H 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋