I'm in a program with a good but fairly shy guy and I wanted to ask him out (no real clue if he's gay).
I've asked him for coffee (not too much came of it) and I'm trying to get him to come for beers with me and some of my friends. I just can't figure out a way to ask him if he's gay and interested without coming out to the entire university and embarrassing him in the process.
He's always really kind to me and lately seems to be standing very very close.
Any suggestions on how to handle this delicately (he's really shy)?
Thanks everyone :)
(no flames pls, I've heard most of them already ;) )
2007-01-11 15:18:56 · 7 answers · asked by Gene M 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Thanks for the info/encouragement guys. Much appreciated :)
2007-01-11 15:27:38 · update #1
Maybe try asking him how he feels about the gay marriage issue..or some other topic that might let you know how he feels about gay life.
2007-01-11 15:23:06 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to ask him questions about books or movies or clothes - they may give you a clue if he is or isn't. I always suspected my best friend was gay but did not really find out until we went shopping for back-to-school clothes one year. He was in denial but I guess I always knew he was because he was always dressed in desinger clothes and knew all the trendy spots and had a very open mind, plus he was not afraid to say he thought vintage Charelton Heston was sexy! Ask probing questions without being obvious or you might scare him. Good luck!
2007-01-11 15:27:11 · answer #2 · answered by Jen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just ask. Unless you are just as shy, you will be single for the rest of your life.
But to do this delicately, ask him out for a burger after class or to a movie, if you are gay just watch him, you will be able to tell, then just go from their. If anything, you will have a new found friend.
2007-01-11 15:25:12 · answer #3 · answered by bakodel1023 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your right don't out yourself in an uncomfortable situation.
Time will hopefully change that it's your generation that is going to count on that most.
Give it time he may have his own way of doing things.
Being shy means he is playful but quiet about it.
Everyone has a different way of saying I like you.
At least he knows if he says something you will be sure to respond a yes on that.
Good luck
2007-01-11 15:24:56 · answer #4 · answered by chicagonative60657 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should initiate chatting with her. i understand it is demanding before each and everything yet you want to get to entice close her earlier you ask her out. Then ask her to flow to a basketball recreation or something college appropriate and tell her that she will be able to convey a chum. Then sit down next to her and search for suggestion from from her and get to entice close her better. Then on the end of the evening tell her chum that you somewhat like the shy lady. trust me her chum WILL tell her that you want her. then you could initiate perchance ingesting lunch with them or something yet do not completely ignore about your friends. Then ultimately you could ask her out =]
2016-12-02 03:51:55 · answer #5 · answered by duperne 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to get him alone in a private setting with no one else around, like your room with the door closed and tell him what you've just told all of us. The important thing is to leave him an out, I mean tell him its cool if he's not into it but you value his friendship and was just wondering if he was interested in more. If not, tell him it is cool. If so, go slow, at his pace.
2007-01-11 15:30:54 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
just drag him along to whatever you want him to accompany to.
2007-01-11 15:23:31 · answer #7 · answered by p 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋