how can I forget ex-wife?

Question

I am divorced since one Month and I am the one who wanted to divorce, but I still love her too much and I think about her.... she did many bad things to me, she lies, tel me bad things... when we sleep together she behaves like a whore and my family dont like her because she behave like a crazy.... what should I do? I cant forget her ... now we are 4 moths separated and one month divorced... I cant think about work ... I knew other women but I have no mood to saty with them ... I think only about my ex wife....

Answer 1

You are going through the grieving part of divorce, which is normal.

Keep yourself busy and when you do find yourself thinking about her, think about all the wrong that was done and how you never want to live like that again.

Answer 2

Sir most all humans have issues; most don't even know they have issues. I was in that group until age 46. Now I am aware of my issues.... and working on them.

Sir you have an issue. For some reason you are attracted to a partner treating you badly and misbehaving and causing you problems. When you figure out why, you will no longer miss your ex wife and you will desire a partner who treats you with respect, and consideration.

A good counsler can help you. I figured out my issues in group sessions; by listening to the story of another person. It's amazing how much we all have in common.

Our past experience shape our behavior today. Some experience in your past has led you to believe you deserve this poor behavior from a partner. In a similar way I have a common issue. I have always been the victim in the victim/bully relationship... I'm getting a lot better now, I don't allow others to bully me.... most of the time now.

Good luck.

Answer 3

Man, I glad u raise it out. I've been thru the same situation u r going thru now. Always wanted to pour it out and now's the time. I think basically u r a nice and loving husband, so nice that u might over pamper, over forgiving yr ex most of the time. Yet she could be the active, restless and rebellous type that always get u worried and feeling lousy. Luckily, inside u there's still some consicous that tells u that leaving her is the correct decision. I agreed with u, u make the right choice. I also see that u do not hv any kids as u did not mention and that's even easier for u to go thru. For me, I've got 2 kids, one 3yo and other 7yo when she left. I mean she just literally left just like that, no contacts and no one knows where she is. Later that I found out she went overseas and later living in one of her gal fren hse. How would u feel? She got a family, husband,children yet she stay in her fren hse! I feel terrible at that time. She has done many, so much hurt that I been tolerating it for past 10yrs. They're even some incidents that I can't even bear to recap at all. Even then I still try begging her to stay but she wouldn't listen. I take a long time to make the decision to file for divorce. (3 yrs) Finally, I can stand no more and pull the trigger. Ya, I was like going thru hell. I lost my job b'cos I can't concentrate in my work and screw up big time. I need to wake up every 3-4 hrs at night to feed my son and change diapers, and in the morning I need to fetch my daughter to school. Imagine, I still think of her, but keep telling myself that's no point to hold on this relationship. Is very sad, very de-moralise for me, I've never done this before and be honest, sometimes by looking at my children, my tears could roll out just like a pouring waterfall. Still I'm thinking about her, just can't understand why? I persist to tell myself, I hv to stand firm on my decision cos I knew I make a very right one! After 4mths past, the missing feeling began to subside and later I found a new job and life begin to blossom again. I even met a gal that I like so much. First, I thought I hv forbia but later I understand her better, she's such an angel to me, totally different from my ex and in fact, the kind of gal I dream of when I was young. She knew of my condition and even accepted me though I hv 2 kids! How wonderful. Now it seems like a happy ending? No, guess what? My ex then came back and express regrett of the whole thing and wanted the me and the family back. After some serious thought, I say no! (Cos I finally understand, a leopard nvr change its spots, and I'm too afraid to go thru everything again as I'm feeling very comfortable with my life now) And let stay this way. Now,she would live her own life and I live mine, occassionally we bring our kids out and I still having the gal of my dreams. If I can forget and live a better life why not u? Cheer up man, I never expected things to happen like this, guess b'cos if you're a good man, god never mistreat u! Good luck, U WILL OVERCOME!

Answer 4

Only time helps. Now you remember only the good and forget the bad. As time passes you will remember only the bad. Go round and see her and she will probably tell you to get lost so that will help you forget her quicker. You have no future with her. Date someone else but take it slowly.

Answer 5

here is the thing if you divorced her it was for the best. and here is the biggest thing you are not mourning the relashionship you are mourning the person you wish she was. please do the best thing and move on when you find that special person and you will you will wonder why you waited so long~

Answer 6

S M A R T must stand for something but what?

Answer 7

It is over, forget about her! Nothing you said about her was good, so why do you care? Over is Over!