My boss pointed his finger at me &called me "young lady" Sex discrim.? p.s. I'm 54 & work here 15 yrs.

Question

This man has been my boss for 3years. i am the manager and he oversees. I have been on this job for 15 years and have 30years ex. in this field. From day one this man has been disrespectful; no communication, sarcastic notes,etc. I had no problems before his tenure.

Answer 1

Is there nobody over him with whom you can discuss this problem? Otherwise, deal with it or find another job. Calling you "young lady" is not sex abuse, nor could it be termed abuse by itsself.
Some people just should not be put in a position where they have to manage and direct others; he's probably one of them. But unless you have an ally at or above his level, it all comes down to deciding how much of his attitude you're going to tolerate.

Answer 2

I'm a legal secretary, so don't think I'm not on your side here. Sexual harassment has very specific definitions. I don't think the words, "young lady" nor the finger pointing qualify. You can report him for just harassment and disrespect and go through a lot of hoops and grilling and chances are, the best that would come of it would be you being told to "learn to get along." Sorry. He's the boss. You're the peon secretary. It's possible that if you tell them you will quit if the problem isn't addressed, as you have 15 years, they may take you seriously. If not, be prepared to follow through on your threat and start looking for another job or suck it up and be prepared to take even more abuse.

Answer 3

The comment "young lady" by itself and the finger pointing is not sexual discrimination. He is not discriminating against you by using the term. You are certainly able to ask him not to address you with that kind of term, same as if someone were to call you honey, babe, or sweetie. If it was one time, I would let it slide. If it happens again, I would sit him down and let him know that is not ok to use with you and you would prefer he find other terminology to address you by.

Pick your battles carefully when you want to file a complaint and don't blow the whistle every time. Save it for when you need the big guns!

Answer 4

Good answer, Lone Star Lou. :-)
I miss the days when people called me a young lady.

My answer is: Don't sweat the small stuff, and pick your fights carefully. If you really think he's harassing you, keep very thorough notes including date, time, and the names of any witnesses. This will give you the ammo you need to get him off your back.

Answer 5

No.
I believe that you can only claim sexual discrimination if he's using your sex as a reason to hold you back on the job. If it truly bothers you, like you have anxiety coming to work, you may have a hostile environment claim.

But both are hard to prove and you can be putting a bullseye on your back and damaging your career if you file without having a solid case.

Good luck.

Answer 6

Get over it, we have too many lawsuits and people who don't want to work already. Deal with it. If this is the most annoying thing he's done, you're easily offended.

Answer 7

Mine called me the "most frustrating woman" he had ever met. I took it as a compliment.

Answer 8

If you personally feel that it is discriminatory and it offends you, then you should report it. There is 0 tolerance of sexual harassment these days, if you don't speak up, it will keep on.

Answer 9

the world is full of assholes,iut seems like u have one..it just makes u job harder..in the long run they get it back..karma

Answer 10

yes i think it is.