Is my husband cheating on me?

Question

He has been leaving a lot more lately, and coming home looking nervous or happy..Sometimes when i talk to him on the cell phone, i either hear soft music or loud background noises(Such as crowds), but most of the time it is soundless.When he comes home sometimes he smells like perfume or a candle scent.I DID hear him talking on the phone, and it was a HUGE clue that he was cheating..Telling the person on the phone "I love you baby bye bye".When he leaves to work he always says short i love you's or doesn't say it at all.He wasn't acting like the man i married at all.We've been together for 1 year and 4 months, and i am beginning to think i should not of married him..Should i be invading his privacy looking for clues?Or should i tell him straight in the face if he is seeing another women?

Answer 1

The phone call would have been the final straw for me.

You can either confront him now, or wait until you have concrete evidence to throw in his face. Given the fact that men tend to try to turn it around and make it as if either you are acting crazy and jealous for no reason, or accuse you of spying on them when they get caught cheating, be ready for a fight.

Answer 2

It does sound like you have ample reason to beleive he's cheating. Enough that I think what you are really asking is just what should you do. You ask for guidence in either asking him outright or to go looking for more clues. Before you do that though I'd suggest you take a deep breath and decide just what this means to you? What will this mean to your relationship from your position, and what do you want to see happen? If you are both willing do you think you can repair the damage this will have done? And so on, these are tough questions, but things you'll want to think about or at least be aware of before you go on. Secondly, whatever his answers to anything that comes, be aware that by his cheating, you've been sexually exposed to other people and should probably be tested for STDs. Make sure you look after yourself during this.

Ok - to confront or to keep looking. I am generally against invading someone else's privacy, though do admit there are times where it may be justified. However, in this case, what do you expect to get? What more evidence do you want? It seems like you know and more evidence would only be useful in the event he just follows a path of "deny deny deny." Which is really where that former thought on your part comes in. Even if you have more evidence, he could still just deny everything - but in either case, if his cheating is a symptom of something he's found missing, that he'd really rather try and have with you if you can mend things, he's probably going to be anxious to try and mend things either by guilt or hope or a bit of both. But you will need to confront him and have him explain what's happening.

Answer 3

This sounds like a pretty serious situation, and I don't blame you at all for suspecting a cheating husband. If I were you, just ask him a few more questions about his day, don't let him brush it off, but don't let it be like an interrogation, just say your interested in his day and you feel as if you've been a little distant from eachother. I would say to him "ahhh you smell lovely- is that a new fragrence" ask him in a way in which he knows that you could on to him- then watch him very carefully- if he avoids eye contact and tries to brush it off/change the subject then there is definately something up! i would say that you now can start your investigation, maybe team up with a friend of yours (but not his) and get her to help you out, perhaps she can follow him one day? then if anything comes out of it and he IS seeing someone, THEN you should ask him if he is having an affair- give him the chance to be honest (for once!) if he still denies, then say well I saw you with my own eyes and have evidence!... For your sake I really hope this turns out not to be the case, but either way know that you are not alone and that this is not your fault. Goodluck and I have my fingers crossed for you.

Answer 4

No, you shouldn't tell him you THINK he's seeing another, until you are sure you KNOW he's seeing another woman. This way, if you decide to let the marriage dissolve, there won't be any ill feelings about it. So, if you've heard these type of comments, then you just need to get proof, and then let him know what your intentions are about the situation. You don't want to give up your years in a marriage that's not going to thrive into happiness and take away your life for nothing. Take care of business.

Answer 5

Be blunt and straight to the point, it will catch him off guard, and you obviously know him or you would not have married him, you know if he is telliing a lie, and go by that. I had a similar problem with my Ex, but she was cheating on me when I went to Afghanistan, not while I was there. good luck, from what your saying something does not sound right, and don't feel bad for wondering, if he was any kind of a good man then he would not even give you the slightest reason to even wonder

Answer 6

I'm not sure of this, but I feel that women are given very strong intuitive feelings. Once they suspect something is going wrong, something is really going wrong. I am not saying that your husband is really cheating on you but the way you describe things going on with your husband, there must be something we have to worry about.
You are on the adjustment period. Here is where most of what we do not know with our partner come out. This may not be in relation to your question but if ever he's really on with somebody, there might be something you have to look into with your relationship. Build on something that you already have that attract him most and if possible add more to that. If you do this your husband will never, never leave you for someone else.
If you believe in God, you pray about this.

Answer 7

It all sounds very saddening babe. Invade his privacy theres no such thing when you get married anyway.

Confront her and ask her if she knows that she is screwing a married man then call her a slut.

Then finish with him don't tell him why or cry or anything just tell him to go.

Answer 8

thats a toughy... while some people will say that you shouldnt invade his privacy and be respectful, if you just go and ask him in his face, he could lie.. If I were in your situation, I would get some sort of proof first, and then ask him if he is sleeping with anyone(give him a chance to tell the truth). If he says no, you can then present the hard evidential proof. You could also try following him..

Answer 9

Jess I hate to say it but I thnk so but do to the fact you only been
together a little over a year that the plus side I known your upset but would confornt him if he is get the hell out because he may dump this chick but in time it will more then likly happen again.
most of the time its a pattern that repeats its self you desever Better then that best of luck Rick

Answer 10

its okay to snoop if u think he is cheating,but if u feel there is something wrong, and u hear him telling someone else on the phone that he loved them, than yes he is for certain cheating on u. when they begin affairs they never act like the same man we married, maybe u need to rethink this marriage, and get out of it, before you have children to think of. he does sound as if he is cheating on u, and there isn't much u can do but divorce the creep. he loves someone but it isn't u, my ex treated me the same way only it took me forever to find out why i was feeling so bad about the relationship, didn't understand why he didn't seem to love me anymore.