i dont, want her here anymore?

Question

i dont, want my grandaughter liveing here anymore i have had enough of her, i feel bad about this but i cannot stand all the problems and i have no one. the police brought her back today cos she stayed out overnight, i asked why and she said she had no credit on hter phone, she should of come back early. she is nine and was with some girl 14 who comes from from a rough family, this girl she was with said to my son one day your sister is a tramp. and this is the type of person she mixes with, she is murder and shouting all the time, banging things and i want the socail to take her away. i am worn out from it all she has been exclued from school

Answer 1

She needs you more now than ever, don't give up on her, you are her only hope.

Answer 2

Grandparents can only do so much . Call a charity NOW , and get advice , if you don't have a clergyman .Child protective services can't seem to keep track of the kids they have already ; and they may not take you serious until it's too late .By getting in touch with a charity that has counselors / and or childrens' advocates -you get someone else involved and you will have an advocate to deal with the nitty gritty when you need it . She is out of control and could cause harm to herself or you .Give her fair warning and the next time she does something harmful and outlandish , make the call to make the change . Some states have organizations for "grandparents raising grandchild ". Check your Yellow Pages .

Answer 3

Hi, I really feel sorry for you, having had two girls and also been involved with the ATC and having run YC's it can be a real trial.
You say she is your Grand Daughter. That will not help either. I also bet you have not had a holiday and that you have other probs as well.
People may say that it is you and yours at fault but I do realise that it is to a large extent the way of life and do gooders. There is nowadays such a fine line that there is no tolerance for overthetop children. However have you spoken to your doctor and the CAB if you are in the UK. Both of these should be able to give you help. Also having a break may help getting said offspring away from the peer group that is causing the problem sometimes helps.
We had probs with both of ours but they have both sort of turned out OK but possibly with clouds on the horizon so we know the situation. One of ours was sent to a trickcyclist and she told her that we would not let her go out etc. When the TC started to have a go at me I suggested she ring the various friends and then my daughter came clean, She did not even know why she did it. The police are wasters in general, they do not want to help, just exacerbate the situation. You can see my profile.
Grasp the nettle and talk tosomeone

Answer 4

That child is 9 years old and you can't control her? You are right, you do need help. I don't know the situation with her parents and why you are raising your granddaughter, but I do know that you are responsible for how she is behaving at this point. She is way to young to express herself or even understand what is going on with her. My guess is that she is rebelling against her parents who are not there. You have taken the role as her parent and you need to do just that. I have a 9 year old son and he is no where near ready to venture out alone at night. You should get ahold of social services and get in a program that will help you and your granddaughter relate better. You should not give up on her, I'm sure she is used to that by now. What that child needs is love and security. You have to be strict with her but yet loving. You are the grandmother and you should be able to be that to her. Unfortunately you have taken on the role as her parent and you need to step up to the plate. Raising children is not easy, I'm sure you remember. It's a little different this time around because you have to sit them down and get into their business. The more involved you are in her life, the less trouble she will get into. She might get upset, but you are in charge. Keep that in mind. I know you are tired, but you have to keep at it. Coming from a similar situation, she will thank you for it later. Good luck and GOD bless.

Answer 5

My mother took in my then 12year old neice. It has been hell. The girl stays out for DAYS, got kicked out of school, and got kicked out of an alternative school. She lies, steals money, steals the car....the list goes on. Lets not even talk about STDs and pregnancy scares.

She needs boot camp or an alternative school. Social work will only mess her up more: you know what foster care is like. Counseling doesn't help either, but it is a great way to start. If you want to save her, start searching the internet for "troubled children" or "out of control children"

Answer 6

this child has no parents, you do not say why- this could be the cause of her 'acting up' she is trying to get the attention she should be getting from her parents, you will do her no favours by handing her over to social services, she will only turn out worse and never forgive you for it. She is a child who is desperately calling out for help and as her grandparent you have to be the person to help her. It may not be fair to you but that's a problem you have to take up with her parents if they are still around. This girl needs help not abandonment, investigate ways you can get help for her, talk to her school search for organisations on the Internet call NSPCC and air your concerns they will point you in the right direction. Please don't give up on her now she has no one but you and that isn't her fault, her behaviour should not be tolerated but should be understood and dealt with effectively and there are ways for you to learn about managing her. She is just 9 just a child not an adult whilst I agree she is driving you mad as the adult it is your job to get her the help she needs. I'm sorry but it's the truth.

Answer 7

Your state should have a Department of Youth Services or Department of Human Services with a Youth Services division. You can get state funded professional help to deal with this problem - and I suggest that you do before something really bad happens to this young girl (she is very young to be acting this way if she is only 9 years old).

Answer 8

This is a very unhappy little girl. At the age of 9 she should not be out without being picked up by an adult at a reasonable time anyway. 8pm was as late as my children were allowed out to play at that age and certainly not after dark and only within sight of the house.. i think you find it difficult to put your foot down with her. perhaps assertiveness classes for you would help. in the meantime just tell her she is grounded for the next 4 weeks and stick to it. if she yells and screams stick earplugs in.

Answer 9

considering you are the adult, you need to take control of this situation. since you mention you have had enough, the next step is getting some help for her and helping her take care of her problems. she is young and does not understand what she is doing, you do know, however. if you do not want to take care of her, see if another relative can take her in or call her parents to come and get her. run the 14 year old girl off and do not allow her to call or come to you home, if she does, then call the police on her. do not allow your granddaughter to use the phone. that is a harsh thing for a grandmother to say about her own grandchild, but i understand if you cannot take it anymore, considering she is only 9 years old, I'm surprised the police have not already called CPS on you both.

Answer 10

Does your granddaughter do this for attention. I feel by reading your question there might be some underneath problems. Have you tried speaking to the school, they might be able to give you some ideas to help you. Can you talk to your grandchild will she confined in anyone. Good Luck.

Answer 11

Hey lady don't take that from some kid, I can't stand young kids nowadays, after leaving school I look down on them they will grow up when they leave all the immature ones did in my year! You shouldn't put yourself under all this emotion shebang, but I don't know how you could dispose of her until she wakes up and smell the coffee hmmm thats a thinker