Why can't people admit that they want children because of SELFISH reasons?

Question

The one thing that I learned from my parents is that they decided to get married and have children for SELFISH reasons. And I have noticed that most people, especially women, are the same way, but are afraid to admit it.

My mother, when she met my father, was a lazy single mother who never worked a day in her entire life (she still hasn’t). She needed a “sugar daddy” to support her, her son, and her extravagant lifestyle. Of course, most men didn’t fall for that trap. So she settled for my father, an over-the-hill 40 year-old man at the time, who wasn’t “rich” but made enough money to support my desperate, dependent mother. I doubt either could do any better, so they settled for each other, got married, and decided to have a few more children out of pure selfishness. They never had me in mind; they never thought of the kind of impact it would have on me growing up and the extreme inferiority complex any normal person in my situation would have developed;

and my mother wasn’t really a loving mother (she didn’t hate me, but she never gave me the attention that I needed growing up). Today, I contend that my mother was a lazy, desperate, gold-digging *****, and my father was a sucker who should have remained single the rest of his life.

Today, things are worse than ever. Western Women s|ut it up (trust me, I’ve nailed over 100 different women), until they reach the “Age of Desperation.” Then they wish to “settle down” and hope that some sucker will come along and support them. Over my dead body. Older women (25-40) hit on young hotties like me all the time and I blow them off every time. I throw away their numbers that I never even asked for and only use them for sex if I cannot find a younger chick to bed down that night. I refuse to marry or have children with an AW, and guess what? __I__ am called “selfish.” Pffft! OK… I am selfish… I’ll admit it… but so are YOU! So don’t blame me when I remain single, only use AW for no-strings-attached sex, save up, and eventually emigrate to Russia where I will marry a tall, blonde, Russian woman to bear my beautiful, (hopefully) blonde children. In the words of Kanye West, “We’re all self-centered, I’m just the first to admit it!”

A similar question just posted by a woman slightly older than me in this section:

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20070111095136AARn7L0&r=w&pa=FZptHWf.BGRX3OFMhzxQU18B9j0ACIPRRRJ5T8ZGNjLxK6wRtxRgB5CEzQwtjBHr3YeEpZRjRNkGjNATGQ--&paid=answered#FpcvXWe0UTiXO2Hll00QmbMGAv2vpRdzBrp5bmebDIPYLuOTPdkn

Shlane: With that mouth, I hope you don't get anywhere NEAR children. They don't need to be exposed to that kind of potty-mouth.

Answer 1

People only want kids because you know, they want their own. People like sex. That's about it. They like the cuteness of babies and all that crap.
Why should these mothers have their own babies when there are TONS of kids in orphanages and without homes?
TELL ME THAT>

You've got a good point, man. I give you kudos.

Answer 2

Wow your question welcomes some serious controversy.
My stance is a little in between. Although I know SOME people don't have children for selfish reasons, there are an awful LOT that do. And the reasons for having children differs from person to person depending on their culture, their upbringings, personal preference, etc. I've asked myself time and time again "Why should I have children?" And I can't come up w/ a good answer. Don't get me wrong, I'm thankful that my parents decided to have me. But I was fortunate enough to have strong loving parents who decided not only to conceive me, but to RAISE me. There's a BIG difference. Giving birth does not make you a PARENT. Animals can give birth too. If more people would have children for the "right" reasons, then maybe society as a whole will have a better chance of surviving in one piece. The cost of living is increasing rapidly, crime is NEVER going to end, hatred will ALWAYS be a part of this world, it would hurt me to see my child have to endure the cruelties of this world w/out being able to always protect him/her.
So I for one chose not to have children, as for the rest of you, I respect your decision.

Answer 3

My mom was 24 when she married my 40 year old dad, who was also a sugar-daddy. And I'm absolutely fine. No inferiority complex whatsoever. You have a 100% stake in what you make of your life and your problems. If you stopped blaming others and looked inward, then you might start to feel better.

Your problems are that you refuse to accept personal responsibility, but instead choose to point fingers at other people for causing your problems. You feel the need to assign blame for feelings that could just be a genetic chemical imbalance. How old are you and why is it so hard to get past the fact that that your mother wasn't affectionate enough toward you? And what on Earth DOESN'T have a selfish motive behind it?

I agree with shlane... it sounds like you probably would be better off dating men, and there's nothing wrong with that. I don't have a problem with what you do with your life as long as nobody gets hurt. That being said, you should disregard what anybody says would be reasonable for a person in your situation and figure out what you really want. Once you figure it out, go for it. You have one chance with your life. Live it as though it's your second chance to get it right and you're about to make the same mistakes. Everybody gets scarred, and there are no guarantees.

Answer 4

Wow, such anger. Every parent becomes so out of selfishness, yes that is true. I am a parent and did so for the same reason. But I dote on my girls and I love them both with all my heart and soul. They both know that. Everything I do, I say, how I act and the person I've become because of them is in thanks to having the children I do have. Without them, I am no one.

Sorry your upbringing was so crappy, but not everyone was brought up like you. Some of us came from loving and supportive homes. It's too bad that you think so poorly of your parents (both of them). Hope you never become a parent or hell even a hubby, I can see a very abusive person behind your angry words. Do all women a favor, and stay single without becoming a father ever.

Answer 5

Blimey!!

Hope you've got that out of you're system.

Relax, enjoy life.

That's what it's for!!

Answer 6

boi sum ppl are just shallow.

Answer 7

So she married for selfish reasons, but what were the "selfish reasons" for having kids? Thanks for inviting us all to your pity party extravaganza. It's your own responsibility to make yourself happy.

Answer 8

Got therapy?

Answer 9

Wow...looks like you have serious issues........anyway, pretty much everything everybody does is for selfish reasons!!! duh!!