Do you think it's easier to be a gay man or lesbian in America? or it's hard for both parties?

Question

I hard a discussion about this in my Women's studies class and I wanted to know. Because I think gay man have a harder time because being gay is like the ultimate opposite of what society thinks a man should be and a threat to Male musculity in America society. Guys are suppose to what to have sex with as many women he can until he's old! So what do you think?

Answer 1

Both face legal discrimination unfortunately.

On the social level, the difficulties are different.

Because we live in a patriarchal society, most of the ideas about masculinity and femininity are 'male driven,' in that there is a clean divide between the way that a male should behave and the way that a female should behave. I believe that women are a bit more fluid in that mode of thought rather than rigid.

A gay man, whether he is effeminate or not, crosses that rigid boundary. Males are threatened by that (IMO) because they see gay men as veiwing straight men the way that straigh men veiw women. (As conquests)

Because of this, gay men are more likely to face physical hostility and violence.

Women, on the other hand, are allowed a bit more fluidity in gender expression than men. The sexualized stereotype of lesbians has created a lot more social tolerance that of male counterparts, but it also opens many lesbians up to leering and/or lacivious behavior on the part of men where they would otherwise deem inappropriate (toward straight women).

After all of that, I still suspect that it is somewhat harder for gay men in the US than it is for Gay women, but not by as big of a gap as many may think.

Answer 2

I think that being a lesbian is easier than being a gay man because gay men seem to be more stigmatized because they are perceived as less masculine. Mind you, being gay or lesbian is harder in America than in countries like Canada or the Netherlands. After all, same-sex marriage is legalized there.

Answer 3

As a lesbian I have to admit that for some reason gay males have a more difficult time in society than lesbians. But then at the same time women gay or straight have a more difficult time in society than males do.

Answer 4

I would tend to agree with you - maybe not for ALL the reasons stated, but to be certain being a gay male flies in the face of the common view of 'manhood'.

Lesbian's on the other hand, can still fulfill all of roles expected of women - nuturing; home makers; parents; bearing and nursing children........have you noticed also that say,. in Hollywood, some women 'change their minds' and then embrace heterosexuality without anyone saying therafter, 'she is a lesbian'.

In the case of your question, this is one time women seem to hav it better than men in society.

Answer 5

It's much easier to be a lesbian cos the mainstream society deems lesbians to be butch, which isn't always the case. But a gay man definitely faces more obstacles cos masculine or effeminate, people who hate guys will call them gay, and for gay men with good hearts, it is difficult to remain friendly and kind to people in general, especially in a workplace environment, where one is supposed to get along with his colleagues.

Answer 6

Women can hold hands and nobody breaks their nose for it. It that way, it's easier and safer for women to espress affection and be themselves.

American society seems less threatend by lesbians, especially since so many straight men include lesbians in their sexual fantasies.

Generally speaking, it might be a lot harder for men. but in high school kids are so cruel, that it's probably equal for both.

Answer 7

I think it is significantly easier for lesbians than for gay men in America today. Lesbianism is viewed as sexy by most of the population and that is usually not the attitude of the masses when it comes to gay men.

Answer 8

In my opinion it would be men having a harder time. Women can kinda hide it too. With men society looks at them differently because they are supposed to be the stronger of the two.

Answer 9

i think it's easier to be a lesbian than a gay man. because for some reason in society gay men are looked down upon while lesbians are more sexually arrousing to males and more attractive to certain peopl.

Answer 10

I think it's equally hard on both side but for different reasons.

Women are supposed to follow social trends, if not their peers can be as cruel as they come. Her peers will mock her, call her all sorts of names even spread viscious lies about her to males out of spite.
Men are supposed to be overtly masculine, be sexual conquerers and whatnot and never ever show any signs of feminity whatsoever. If they're gay their peers can ruin them socially as well.
Both groups have their own set of difficulties in the social arena.