I had an "oops" with my hubby last night and he wants me to take the morning after pill and I don't. Advise?

Question

We are planning on trying later in the year, however, we were hoping to catch up on some bills, etc. I personally would like to just see what happens but he is firm that he wants to try in the fall....

I found out today that I am ovulating. We are planning on trying later this fall. I would like to wait and see what happens but my husband want to wait until when we planned on trying so that we can get out finances situated, etc.

Answer 1

Why are you married to someone that would kill his own baby for the sake of paying some extra bills?

God almighty woman, think about it a minute. Is 8 months really going to make that big of a difference? Why cant you pay the bills while you're pregnant?

Guh. People like your husband make me sick.

Answer 2

The morning after pill is not an abortion. It prevents pregnancy in the same ways the standard birth control pill does. It just ramps up the process very quickly, thus the increased side effects. If you would not have a moral problem with the Pill, there is no issue with the MAP.

That out of the way, it is ultimately your choice to take a medication or not, but my feeling would be - if you and your husband agreed to use contreception and wait on a child, and the contreception failed, your husband is not out of line in wanting you to use a backup. If you hadn't made any clear decisions, his pressure is more unacceptable.

It sounds like there as been a massive failure of communication and planning. Hopefully pregnancy won't result this month because it will cause a huge amount of stress on your relationship if it does. If it doesn't, I'd recomend a sit down on an actual plan for children, including whether you will use emergency contreception.

Answer 3

Not that long ago I was you, except my husband never suggested the morning after pill. We wanted another child but were going to wait until the summer, but instead got pregnant and now I am due any day now. The thing is you have to look at it this way: You want children together. That is it, and you know what none of us are debt free, well I know that we arn't and it will be a struggle until I go back to work. But if we did abort this child and something happened to one of us and that person wasn't there anymore how would we feel. If you are pregnant think of it and explain it to your husband that tomorrow might not come for one of you, and if there is a baby then it is a gift not a hassle. If he is still insistent on you taking the morning after pill, then you have to think about what your options are. I don't agree with the MAP or abortion, but if you truly love this man and he truly loves you he will understand how you feel. The other thing is will you really be OUT of debt in 8 months? Anyway hope all goes well, and good luck.
Kath

Answer 4

This is tough for anbody, but for me personally ... parenting is a 2 way street and I'd have to respect my husband's wishes... only when both parents are on the same page can you truely work as a unit. You may want to tell your husband though that the side effects of the morning after pill are NOT pleasant, you'll need to take 2 days off of work (so much for those bills!) you'll be cramping like mad and sick to your stomach. I had to take it once when i was 19 and i'm telling you, i'd never do it again... what are the chances that you are pregnant? Is this around your ovulation date? If it's before I doubt you'd have to worry anyway... think about it. If something hurts that bad to take, is it worth the risk of it doing damage? Did you know that if you take the morning after pill mid cycle that the failure rate is high, and because of the high dose of hormones in it.If pregnancy does occur, the use of these drugs can have significant effects on the developing embryo. Pregnancy termination may have to be considered anyway. Could you live with yourself having caused such harm to your body, your baby, and then having to have an abortion anyway? All because your husband has a few bills.... think about it.

Answer 5

Honey you need to sit down and have a two way conversation with your hubby not just let him tell you how it is going to be. You got 9 months to prepare for a baby, so if you actually are going to get pregnant it will be fall before its born. Plan you'r finance better like don't buy that just because and don't eat out just because and catch up on those bills faster. Good Luck.

Answer 6

It is YOUR body..do what you feel is right! Don't let him make that decision for you. Wouldn't you want to give this possible pregnancy a chance? There is also another chance that you are not pregnant. Why would you put yourself through all the possible side-effects that the morning-after pill comes with. He should have been a little more careful last night if he didn't want you to become pregnant until later this year.

Answer 7

you should kick back down regardless. i recognize that's now complicated yet you'll locate that you imagine clearer and are more desirable concentrated on the concern. i imagine any style of argument is ideal stated in man or woman. initially, it really is a lot less complicated to dangle up than walk away. Secondly, there is contact. in case you want to say something which couldn't bypass over nicely, a contact will ease the discomfort. yet attempt to hit upon a answer not throw rocks at one yet another to damage one yet another (as tempting because that's).

Answer 8

Some people are very ignorant and believe that the morning after pill kills a implanted egg. This is far from the truth. All the morning after pill will do is prevent implantation.

Go with your heart. However, your husband could end up resenting the child if he knows that it could have been prevented.

Go to plannedparenthood.com for more information, such as truths and falses about the morning after pill, and BC, and condoms.

Good luck.

Answer 9

its not like your not married...
and if he was planning on trying in the fall there isnt that much difference.
you got 9 months to pay your bills. Thats enough time and even if you still have some remaining and its that bad set up payment plans... nothing wrong with that...
you dont even know if your pregnant or not anyways. so i would ADVISE no. you dont want to so DONT!
and you should have been on birth control if you were both really worried about it. Or if you didnt want to be on that i know condoms suck but if you used one more than likley you wouldnt be in this situation.
talk to your husband if he's anything of a man he will understand its not just your fault. it took both of you!!!!
GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!!

Answer 10

hey there,

having a baby is beautiful but also frustrated . especially when the finances are not there. it can get very expensive . i would get my finances together first ,so your child can have a comfortable life... don't never rush into things ! you will regret later. just make a plan talk to your husband and work things out . after all you guys are a team. and a baby is a gift from god . so it's god's timing .. god bless you .

Answer 11

I'd take it. It partly depends on where you are in your cycle; if your period's due in a couple of days or you just had one, then don't bother, but otherwise if you are pregnant he may resent the baby and be less supportive as a result. If you're not, no harm done.

And the thing about the MAP is that you won't ever have to think about it again. There might, just possibly, but probably not, be a bunch of cells multiplying away in there, but that's all.

Then, use BC properly and start taking Folic Acid and generally preparing yourself to get pregnant in the fall.

BTW - not everyone reacts that badly to the MAP. I took it years ago and it didn't bother me in the slightest; no cramps, no sickness, nothing.