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My 16 yr old stepdaughter doesn't follow the house rules of no boys in the bedroom. My husband is really hesitant to discipline her because he wasn't the one who found her. How do I handle this?

2007-01-11 00:48:38 · 6 answers · asked by Angie Kay 2 in Family & Relationships Other - Family & Relationships

6 answers

The person who made the rule should be the one to enforce it, and you really haven't been clear about that. If the house is yours and you made the rule for those that live there, then it's your responsibility to enforce it and discipline her. Otherwise, it is her father's responsibility.

Personally, unless you caught her in the act of something else, you should probably just ignore it and let it pass, and probably rethink the rule while you're at it. If the rule is designed to prevent her from having sex, then it won't work, because she'll just have it somewhere else if she wants it. If the intention is just so that she doesn't do it in YOUR house, then that's a different story. In any case, a rule of "no sex" would be more of what you need, and not banning boys from her bedroom completely. What about those that simply are there to help with a project or homework? You think they want you hovering over them while they're doing it? A rule like this would simply make it more likely that your daughter would go to visit them at their house, instead of them visiting her.

2007-01-14 03:38:45 · answer #1 · answered by baka_otaku30 5 · 0 0

Your husband is her parent, not you. He should be the one to discipline her, with your full support, of course. It seems that he does not want to be the bad guy and that he is trying to bring that burden on to you. Tell your husband that it his duty as a father to discipline his daughter, and that you will back him up in whatever actions he decides to take. Teenagers are masters at playing one adult against the other. Nip this one in the bud, and do not allow anything like this to go unnoticed in your home again. I speak from experience. I have brought six children into adulthood. Good luck to you.

2007-01-11 09:10:37 · answer #2 · answered by Ti 7 · 0 0

Doesn't matter who found her. You and hubby need to present a united front on this, but if he is her biological father he needs to be the one to take the initiative in her discipline......which should begin with a serious talk about why this rule is important and NO EXCEPTIONS. If she is ususlly obedient with a good attitude then the infraction could pass with a minor grounding or such. However, if this is a trend, she may need to be convinced that serious behavior (which this is) will bring on serious consequences.

2007-01-11 08:57:51 · answer #3 · answered by Puzzler 5 · 0 0

Your problem is with your husband ,not your step daughter,he should be the one disciplining her but, he doesn't want her to not like him because he feels guilty for the divorce, and that he and her mother are not together,thus she gets away with murder This is also her way of getting back at him and acting out because her life has been put into a shambles by the adults in her life.Ta DA he needs to be the one to discipline not you...sorry

2007-01-11 08:56:19 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

this was a household rule for me growing up as well..your best bet would be to not allow company when the parents arent home.
when the rules get broken the phone goes first..thats killer, but it always worked on me.

2007-01-11 08:54:27 · answer #5 · answered by kim 3 · 0 0

Slap thie ***** for being a Hoe

2007-01-11 09:01:35 · answer #6 · answered by rm4real 3 · 0 0

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