my ex-boyfriends dad mudered his wife when my ex-bf was a child, about 10-11yrs old. my ex-bf and his siblings witnessed the whole thing. his dad tried 2 kill himself after killing his wife, but my ex took the knife out of his throat, n his dad survived. his dad killed his wife 4 cheating on him, his dad was really drunk, got manslaughter, served 5-6yrs. my ex seemed 2 stereo-type all women as sluts n whores, i know this was a very traumatizing event in his life, im broken up w/ him now n im kinda worried if he tries 2 do anything 2 me. my ex is very controlling, over-protective, obsessive, stalker-type, violent and he also has a drinking problem. im not worried when he's sober, he's not violent when he's sober but he's complete opposite when he's drunk, crazy, careless, stupid. do u believe that history always repeats itself?
2007-01-10 21:35:48 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Your concern has merit. Be alert. It is a reliable measuring stick to compare upbringing with adulthood and find common threads.
The difference between you and your X's mother is that you have the added information of being prewarned.
In a situation like yours the fear of it happening can often be the spur to set wheels in motion.
Ok, so you know when he is sober all is well.
How to reason with a drunkard .... very hard.
You need to prepare for the event just in case.
Find from your vast knowledge of his past an area which inspires his love and compassion and store it away for such a time when you may need to say or do something to change the situation.
If a bad moment arises try to ask questions rather than make statements.
Do state that you are afraid if that is the case. By doing so, you will empower yourself to deal without panic.
Remain calm, anything else will accelerate the other persons state of agitation.
Finally, look after yourself and set up a help network of friends or neighbours in the event something does happen.
Now the most important part.
This is a case of a very disturbed child growing up with poor relationship skills....It does not mean he is a killer and it is not fair to project that fear upon him.
Therefore, dont let your thoughts breed reptiles of the mind.
Quote." Oh what tortured sufferings come from problems that never arrived "
Feel free to E-mail me...
2007-01-11 09:27:50 · answer #1 · answered by tillermantony 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I see someone suggested a restraining order. How laughable, like a piece of paper will stop a bullet or a knife. Move, as far away as possible because what you've described is a psycopath!
2007-01-10 21:50:46 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It could, however did he have any counseling for it? I would move away if you are concerned or just get a retraining order if he comes around and scares you otherwise just stay away and don't answer his calls.
2007-01-10 21:41:34 · answer #3 · answered by LSD 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It certainly is something you should be taking precaution against! Moving out of the area, is one thing that comes to mind! Or get a really big boyfriend whose trained in the martial arts!
2007-01-10 21:47:38 · answer #4 · answered by wheeliebin 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
think he has things in his past he has not resolved, and if u don't end it with him, u may be in for a very bad life. your boyfriend blames his mother for all of it, her cheating, and all. get rid of this man and never go back to him. his past seems to be affecting his life now.
2007-01-11 00:05:50 · answer #5 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
QUITE OFTEN HISTORY REPEATS ITSELF. THIS PERSON APPARENTLY AGREES W/ FATHER IF HE THINKS ALL WOMEN R SLUTS & WHORES.HE ALSO DRINKS (LIKE FATHER) ,IS A NASTY DRUNK , & SOUNDS LIKE HE'S OK W/ HIS FATHER KILLING HIS MOTHER. HOW LONG DID U DATE HIM ? I WOULD BE AFFRAID. HE'S LIKE HIS FATHER IN ALOT OF WAYS.
2007-01-10 21:53:56 · answer #6 · answered by krzeamy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stay away from him. There are other man out there.
2007-01-10 22:34:01 · answer #7 · answered by RunSueRun 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋