The doctors say say "It" is healthy do i not find my wife sexually attactive anymore? How do i find out.? Is cheating the only option?
2007-01-10 18:44:17 · 11 answers · asked by ? 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The doctors probably say that because they are not attracted to their wives. I dont think cheating is the answer.....I think communication is the key. If you were sexually attracted to her before....what has changed? Has she put on a lot of weight, has she suddenly got ugly...work out what is turning you off about her and then work on ways to improve it. If you went out and cheated, you would hurt your wife terribly, so wouldnt it be better to talk to her about this?
You probably dont have to talk to her about it, she already knows, but if you havent told her, then she is probably thinking all sorts of things. Get it out in the open....tell her why you are not sexually attracted to her and ask her is there anything you can do to spice your sex life up a bit. Just be honest....I am sure she would appreciate your honesty more than if she found out you were cheating.
Give it a shot....nothing ventured, nothing gained.
2007-01-10 19:00:35 · answer #1 · answered by rightio 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That tuff. At this point it's all in your head. You could do a number of things, not to say thier the best but you could think of someone else while making love to her. If not then you've got to convince yourself that your wife is beautiful. Try to picture her as she was when you got together, or think of your feelings for her at that time. When you see a gorgeous woman don't compare them to your wife or wish they were with you. Be happy your with the one you're with. It sounds like you love this person or you wouldn't be concerned. (if all else fails then put on the beer goggles. j/k) good luck. Cheating won't really tell you if you find your wife attractive or not.
2007-01-11 02:55:15 · answer #2 · answered by Adam L 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
uhm...ok, I guess by "it" you mean your penis. we're adults here - let's call things what they really are.
No, it does not mean you're not attracted to your wife amd cheating is never an option unless you want to ruin your marriage. try sex therapy. try new things in bedroom, get a few videos - not necessarily porn, but erotica (yes, there is a difference). try play sexual games with you wife - there are plenty of books/articles/etc. about it. Try kama sutra books with illustrations. In other words, there are plenty of ways to bring back the spark and make "it" work again
2007-01-11 02:54:38 · answer #3 · answered by pupsik_2001 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Could be stress. Did your Dr. check your testosterone level? You could try Viagra temporarily. Maybe it's a confidence problem. Cheating is not the answer unless you really want to sabotage your marriage.
2007-01-11 02:51:24 · answer #4 · answered by crazywoman88 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been with my boyfriend for 6 yrs so I can tell you, things in bed do get stale every now & then for no reason. It's just the ravages of time.
You obviously love her enough to marry her and that's a tremendous step in a relationship! Sex life and love life are two very diff. things, please don't confuse them. Sex drive seems obviously important to you but you need to 'maintain repairs' on that one. Both you and your wife.
YOu gotta change your routine in the sack. You can't seriously think what worked for you before will work for the next 40 yrs! Talk to her about trying new things. She may act like a prude at first but wait it out and let the idea sink in before she discusses it with you further. Just give her something to think about first. She'll slowly open up!
Next: Spice up your love life. Try sensual massages, bjs, whatever. If you're used to missionary, switch to doggy style. Maybe multiple partners works for you guys. Doing it in public is naughty if you can get away with it. Keep switching and experimenting until you find something that's fun for both of you.
Another thing that hurt our sex life was bouts of deep depression, finance problems that zapped our sex drive, and the fact that he's a morning person and I'm a night owl. We talked out our problems which alleviated our burdens three-fold, then we were happy enough to get it on. We compromised on doing it diff. times of day and night and finally got it right. We continually keep switching styles to keep things fresh. Believe me, it takes a lot of diff. things before you find comfort in your love life.
2007-01-11 03:13:42 · answer #5 · answered by SloBoMo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It probably has more to do with you than with your wife. See a psychologist to help you work on these issues. Do not cheat -- this will not make anything better.
2007-01-11 02:49:42 · answer #6 · answered by drshorty 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no cheating is not a opition talk to your wife about maybe spicing things up in the bedroom and you may have some results with that. but dont cheat on her it is not worth the pain she has to go through.
2007-01-11 02:49:28 · answer #7 · answered by stephanie o 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
dude. 2 words. errectile disfunction. try viagra or sometning
2007-01-11 02:49:24 · answer #8 · answered by blackbelt20 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like a mental problem?
2007-01-11 02:49:22 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
u mean, you never did before?
that's bad!
2007-01-11 03:31:10 · answer #10 · answered by sassy girl 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋