My best friend and I are like brother and sister. For as long as I can remember we have done pretty much everything together. Until a few months ago we used to walk every afternoon, hang together most nights, watch movies, play pool and see our mates at the pub.
Now he has a girlfriend. Don't get me wrong, I love seeing him happy, and I am pretty good friends with his gf too, but it seems that now they are neglecting their other friendships. At first I thought i was just being jealous, but then I got talking with his gf's best mate and she feels the same. I never hear from him unless I call him or go see him and I really miss my best friend. When I need him most he is "too busy" to talk / listen, and I have tried explaining to him that just one day out of every week, just the two of us would be nice. All he can say is "you can come round and see US whenever you want"
Why doesn't he get that I need time with just him sometimes?
What should I do?
2007-01-10 15:39:54 · 12 answers · asked by loza500 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
*** that happens anytime people get into a new relationship. they can't get enuf of each other, and it seems their friends always feel the pinch cause they're the ones being left out. it's not really fair cause the friendships'll last and the love relationships don't always last. i guess it's just a case where u have to be understanding cause the day'll come when u have a brand new bf and you'll forget about your friend for a bit. thing is, just know that he'll come around and he'll be back...things just are ever changing in any relationship.
Also, this gives u a chance to make some new friends or bond a little tighter w/ your other friends. I mean, it's a sad thing but a person can't have just one super close person and no one else.
And maybe this experience will help u realize that this isn't how u wanna treat your friends when u have a bf. it's painful but it IS a learning experience.
2007-01-10 15:58:38 · answer #1 · answered by meme 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I assume this happened in the short term..maybe a month or less? When friends fall in love it's like they can't get enough of one another and it's in some ways 'normal' for them to just seem to forget about anything else. Can't really blame them though, when love comes everyone somehow loses some sense and minds.
That said, being together a lot also mean that people will end up having just a little too much of each other. Then they can start striking a balance, and of course, if things didn't go well then he'll need his best friend's advice right?
It's going to be a little tricky to get used to way things are, but as the good friend you are, just be patient and don't start blaming/hating anyone because it's not worth it. A strong friendship proves itself in not how much time friends spend time together, but how long the friendship actually lasts over the years. He'll get back to you sooner or later for ideas and things here and there. All the best!
2007-01-10 15:48:43 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is so tough. I've just gone through something exactly the same, worse still, they ended up moving away and despite tears and promises to keep in touch, I haven't heard a thing for a month except a Merry Christmas text. It makes me question who I like and that really sucks. All it reveals to me is that I needn't be so head over heals the next time I fall for a guy. It is no wonder that some girls experience such heartbreak when they break up with somebody; they have forgotten their friendships and family and all of a sudden this guy leaves their life and they can't remember what to do or how to get through the day. It is a mistake on their part and it hurts but you have to get on with life. He will eventually come back to you when the honeymoon is over.
2007-01-10 15:54:27 · answer #3 · answered by sticky 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are truly his best friend, you will not lose each other but adjust to the changes that occur when adding partners to the mix. It's about working on the relationship needs of the partnership.
Everyone adjusts and finds a place to fit, without causing problems in the relationship. Just because you go over to "their" place doesn't mean he won't be available for a chat alone with you. And you never know, she just might prove to be invaluable with support and advice when you need it. Don't think if it as losing a best friend, but perhaps gaining another support person in your life. It will show him that you understand how important his relationship with his partner is to him and show her that you understand the new dynamics.
Not a good idea nor is it necessary for him to go out without her. A new relationship needs quality time to build a solid foundation.
And if your relationship as his "best" friends is solid it will survive the impending changes. If you are willing to adjust with it and not fight it.
You need to decide how important your friendship is with him. To help you determine how much or little you are willing to adjust.
Perhaps you care for him a bit more than as a 'best' friend.
2007-01-10 16:10:45 · answer #4 · answered by T esira 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all. She's no longer engaged at 15, -- it is purely stupid teenager speaking. i understand you are able to love at 15, I did -- yet engagement is a distinct tale. human beings threat lots from 15 to an older age. i'm 22 now and that i've got matured lots as a results of fact i replaced into 15. -- That being mentioned i think of it replaced into incorrect of her as much as now a buddies Ex ... it is an off limits zone constantly! yet what's executed is complete, .. it relatively is been very nearly a three hundred and sixty 5 days now and she or he's misplaced the buddies already.
2016-12-19 14:48:23 · answer #5 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is what happens when people get older and develop relationships. It's part of life. When you get a boyfriend you'll feel the same way. You might not like it now , but you have to try to understand.
2007-01-10 15:44:34 · answer #6 · answered by . 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He has a girlfriend. You are a friend, there is a difference. Go find a boyfriend for YOU!
2007-01-10 15:48:34 · answer #7 · answered by regwoman123 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is a couple now.Go visit sometimes like he said.Find a boyfriend of your own.
2007-01-10 15:43:46 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
well i think hes way too into the relationship rite now. maybe he will get over it soon when hes not soo into his gf as he is now.
2007-01-10 15:43:40 · answer #9 · answered by anonymous 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i honestly don't know but if you do find out you should tell me cuz i'm currently going through the same thing with my best friend and her b/f it sux!!
2007-01-10 15:49:33 · answer #10 · answered by maddog 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋