How can I not let what others say affect me?

Question

I have depression and I am angry all the time. I don't let people in because I can't handle being rejected. I cry and cut myself. I just don't know what to do with the hurt I feel. So this stranger I met in a chat said I was beyond help. I had talked to him a few times and he said cared about because he has suffered a lot? I don't think I'm beyond help, I just think I have a lot of healing to do and am not at the point of being in new relationships. I feel like I need others validations to be alright. How can I change that?

I know I am seeking validation right now. I just don't know what to do. I am on meds and I do have a psychatrist. I only cut when things get too out of control with my emotions. The hurt I feel it in my chest and I think to myself, "how can this be living?"

Answer 1

I think you need medication to stabilize your moods also do something you wanted to do but have been too afraid to due to other peoples opinions such as wearing something you like and you don't think other people would, the only way to stop needing other peoples opinions for your own personal needs is to become more independent to teach your self not to rely on everything other people say there are times in life that we will have to do things alone and make important decisions without the help of our friends. Get into the routine of doing things on your own choice like seeing a movie on your own or other places you wouldn't usually go to without your friends to keep you company.
I think something to help your moods a good friend to listen to your problems and teaching your self to be more independent will help your problems

Answer 2

First of all noone is beyond help
humans were made so that they can always improve
you do not need the validation on anyone. Think of everything you've done in your life think of hte bad and the good. Whats done is done but you still have a long future. Any th ing you did u dont like do do again. and pls pls do not cut your self its not the way to get out of depression. Im sure after you cut yourself your even more depressed. What you need the most is a good friend. someone to let all this o ut to. and with the hurt your feeling- time will heal

Answer 3

I don't think you have to change that completely. Everyone needs a certain amount of validation from whatever social networks like friends or family. I think you need to talk to someone with professional experience who can counsel you about the way you feel and give you advice on what to do.

Don't listen to whoever said you're "beyond hope." What does he know?

Answer 4

You're looking for validation right now. You're looking for the safest form of validation...from a bunch of people that cannot see or hear you. All they can do is read the words that you typed. You need to seek professional help if you are so depressed that you'd harm yourself physically. That's something that can lead you down so many other dangerous paths. I really wish you all the best in the world...and I truly hope that what you said was truthful..and if it was, you really need to talk to a professional psychiatrist or therapist.

Answer 5

I would recommend a book by Depok Choppa: The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success. He gives an excellent explanation for your question. According to him you don't need to rely on others opinions of you. You cannot be at the mercy of anyone walking down the street who makes a negative remark to you. Remember that almost all the time when people criticize you or others it is because of their owns fear of inadequacy.

Try to take what people say, how they remark to you, for what it is worth at that moment, then let it go. Don't allow yourself to be a prisoner of the thoughts of others. Hope this helps.

Answer 6

Simple. We live in a world where EVERYONE is set on worrying what others think of them al the time despite social position. So with that said if they are all so infatuated with themselves and how they appear outwardly then it is only logical that when you are not around they dont think of you soo who cares what they think when they are around you if that is the case.