My husband and I have been married for almost 2 years now. With in the past 8 or 9 months I've noticed he's picked up a new hobby or habit which completely disgusts me. Whenever he goes to the bathroom he decides to pass time by "digging for gold" and then he displays his "treasures" on my walls. I thought I must imagining things at first, but no, that's exactly what it is. It's only the two of us in the house, so it's not like there's someone else doing it. It's very obvious, but I feel embarassed to say something. I don't know how to go about it. But he has to know that it is noticeable. How do I descreetly let him no to STOP and clean up his mess, he's almost 30, not 3.
2007-01-10 14:03:18 · 48 answers · asked by Lady blah blah 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Polite my you know what! Just flat out tell him to stop! He is the one who should be embarrassed not you. You could always make a poster and hang it by the pot that says"put em here" or I would humiliate him and start telling everyone about it. You could come up with your own disgusting habit that you know would gross him out and when he complains you can tell him...now you know how I feel. He needs to grow up or read an etiquette book. Good Luck
2007-01-10 14:18:55 · answer #1 · answered by Debcee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hope when you are saying that he is digging for gold means he is picking his nose! I had to giggle at this one. (smile)
I even had to think about this one for awhile because I had never thought that there would be a husband in this world putting his treasures on the walls of his home.
This is sure a bad habbit that he's probably kept since he was a child. Surprise that his mother didn't teach him other ways to rid his treasures.
Well the best thing that I came up with is, when the two of you are home. Ask him to go to the bathroom with you and have him sit on the toilet. Ask him if he notices anything unusual in the bathroom. If he says no, then ask him if he is notices anything different on the floor. If he then says no, then ask him if he notices anything on the walls. You may need to make sure that his treasures are there before asking him about the walls. If he notices them. Then, that is when you ask him, "what do you think those are?" (smile) If he says, "I don't know." Just say to him that you think they are his treasures! He will probably be baffled about all this, but most likely be embarrassed too.
Because once you find out, I bet he will not do it again. And just advice him next time he goes looking for treasure, to make sure he puts them in toilet paper and not on the walls where they are noticeable. Let him know it grosses you out and let him know that it is unsanitary. So simple! But be polite and with humor. (smile)
2007-01-10 14:22:55 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What is marriage? To me (a 25 year old unmarried man) it's all about communicating and trying to live with each other without killing each other. With this in mind I say you if it's a habit that can lead to you killing/leaving him, you should communicate with him and let him know that this thing he does is gross. If you bottle it up inside for any much longer you might snap at him and end up getting a divorce.
Keep in mind though that this habit might be a deeper issue for him. When he digs for that nugget and places it on your beautiful walls, does he jump up with joy and laugh like a schoolgirl? Does he pick that perfect nose treasure and put it up on the wall like he just won first place in the 2007 pick in roll contest? Either way this behavior needs to stop. If you do not say anything, you will lead him to believe that doing disgusting things in your house is an acceptable practice.
What's next you say? Dutch ovens galore(farting in the blanket when you're together and then lifting the blanket so you get a nice aroma of what was for dinner). Taking dumps on the kitchen counter and saying "honey dinner is served". Scratching his Hershey highway and sniffing it and tricking you into smelling it because he says it "smells like lemon". Don't let it get to this point. COMMUNICATE WITH HIM!! He is your husband and if you want your marriage to make it to 2 years so you can get that 24 karate/booger necklace be honest, but let him down easily because if he is proud of these booger postings you might hurt his feelings.
Good Luck
-Beejster
2007-01-10 14:16:26 · answer #3 · answered by lifeagent 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Assuming that you don't have a comfortable channel of communication without embarassing either or both parties, a subtle approach could be to place a small box of tissue paper easily accessible near (not over) his favourite wall-spot.
Be innovative as to how you can place the tissue box on the wall - a clip-holder, simple shelf or even use strong double sided tapes for the mounting of the shelp or box.
If it doesn't work, you can subtly ask him, during an 'overall' toilet cleaning operation, in a curious and 'uninformed' tone, what he thinks of the strange 'fungus-like' growth on the walls.
Either way, find a right time to suggest to him that using the conveniently located tissues could help solve the problem.
2007-01-10 14:14:44 · answer #4 · answered by Son of Gap 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Haha... so funny. But... I know how you feel. My husband has a similar habit. Anyway, DON'T be embarassed to tell him to STOP. He's already embarassed himself by sticking his boogers on the wall. So tell him to stop, and if he doesn't stop, CALL HIS MAMA!
* By the way, you should be really serious about it. Have a serious tone when you confront him. Let him know that you're really, seriously bothered/disgusted by this. Otherwise, it could easily turn into a joke and he'll continue sticking boogers. But DEFINITELY confront him. Grossey gross.
2007-01-10 14:09:24 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Put up a bright red bullseye target. He'll might ask you what it's for and you can tell him (laughingly) that you thought you'd make his extra little "bathroom activity" more fun. Then tell him you got tired of cleaning the walls.
Honey, you'd better learn early not to take this kind of crap. Get it out in the open so the resentment won't build up.
2007-01-10 14:14:30 · answer #6 · answered by TPhi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why did you let it go on for this long?
Take him by the hand, go into the bathroom, point out the problem, him on the nose with a newspaper telling him "bad boy, bad boy!" Who cares if he feels embarrassed??? He should be embarrassed that he's an adult acting like a 4 year old!
2007-01-10 14:22:07 · answer #7 · answered by Ella 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
EEWWW!! What ever happened to magazines in the bathroom?! But seriously, I don't think that there is a discreet way to tell him to stop. Just tell him straight up that you are tired of it and if he doesn't have the decency to grab a little piece of T.P. and flush the darn thing down when he is done, then he needs to find another place to poop! It would be embarrassing for me too, but you gotta do what you gotta do!!
2007-01-10 14:13:55 · answer #8 · answered by melody g 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him to STOP picking his nose and leaving his "findings" on the walls then hand him the all purpose cleaner and a sponge and tell him to get to work. HE's your husband...not a stranger being "embarassed" to say something to him is silly. Don't the two of you communicate at all?
2007-01-10 14:13:52 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't decreetly tell a 30 year old to stop putting boogers on the wall. That's nasty. You need to just flat out tell him it's disgusting and politely ask him to clean the walls. Let him know it makes you want to vomit and if he loves you he'll quit.
2007-01-10 14:08:02 · answer #10 · answered by Michelle G 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋