i am gonna keep my baby, but the thing is am worried cos i dint just open-wide i was raped, not by one guy but by 8. am lucky to be alive councelling isnt helpin cant bring myself to abort what am i to do?
2007-01-10 12:44:25 · 11 answers · asked by doyinn 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
try talkin with a friends or your parents
2007-01-10 12:57:08 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Over 30 years ago my Mum was gang raped & fell pregnant. She was 16 and was forced to give her baby up for adoption- there was no help for mums back then . She wanted to keep her baby - despite how it came to be it was still her baby and she wanted it but her parents forced her into an unwed mothers home and the baby - a girl - was given up for adoption. Some 20 years later and mother and daughter were reunited and it was incredibly difficult - my Mum relived the rape and its trauma over again and was faced with telling her daughter how she was conceived and that she didn't know who the father was - more trauma. They now have no relationship at all and I just wanted you to hear another side of what can happen. My Mum always said losing a child changes who you are as a person. Please weigh up your options, keep up with the councelling and make a decision that is right for you, a decision that you can live with for the rest of your life. Stay strong and know you are in my prayers.
2007-01-10 21:24:12 · answer #2 · answered by kfraserseeto 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You are right it is not your fault. However, you should think long and hard about what it is you wish to do. There are other options besides getting an abortion. There is adoption. You need to think about what may happen a little later in life and about how you and the baby may feel. In the end, you are the only person who can decide what to do. I wish you well.
2007-01-10 20:54:37 · answer #3 · answered by suz' 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seek a different counselor if this one isn't helping. I feel so badly for you. Abortion is never a solution... & I think you will feel worse if you have one... Try finding an adoption agency & search for a nice loving family... Hearing their stories & knowing that through your tradgedy you can put a smile on their face & a child in their arms may help you to feel better about everthing that has happened! My prayers are with you!
2007-01-10 20:55:08 · answer #4 · answered by Boppysgirl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you considered adoption? You may find that trying to raise a child conceived of rape will only remind you of the assault everytime you see the child, have to deal with it's needs, etc. Somone is out there who can give the child a good, loving home without the history of how it was conceived or who it's father might be.
Also, please consider finding a different therapist. They aren't all the same. Be persistent and find one that does help,
2007-01-10 20:52:01 · answer #5 · answered by knittinmama 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
eventually you will come to a decision own your own no one can tell you how to feel or what to feel it is awful what happened to you but you have 2 ways to look at this! 1 is the baby is part of you no matter what and you will love that baby! 2 is you need to come to terms with can you look at the baby everyday for the rest of your life in love and not hate my thing is it wasn't yours or the babys fault and i hope those guys pay big time GOOD LUCK in everything you choose
2007-01-10 21:29:10 · answer #6 · answered by Jennifer B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its really up to you....if you do not belive in abortion, i admire you....after what happened to you...youre a hero. you could consider adoption, and ask to be part of the baby;s life. if you are even thinking about keeping the baby, think it throughly. counceling is crap, to be honest with you. you might wanna search for help somewhere else..
i REALLY hope that whatever decision you take its the one YOU want, and will be happy with.
2007-01-10 20:53:39 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all....stay strong! MANY women these days are single parents...(I am one of them) You have to think about what you want for the child. There are many services and people to help you and the emotional aftermath you must be going through! I can say for myself that no matter how I got in my situation, my daughter is the best thing that has ever happened to me. Good luck.
2007-01-10 20:59:13 · answer #8 · answered by jaime j 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is not your fault. It is not the babies fault. You are not obligated to keep it, but if you do, that is your choice. If it helps.. I have a 7 year old with a man that never has seen her by choice, and I don't look at her and think of him.. I did at first, but after awhile.. you see your child as an indivual.. as just yours... I don't look at her and think of him...
Whatever you choose... don't be hard on yoruself.. whatever you choose is OK...
2007-01-10 21:44:22 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you thought about adoption? You should look into a women's shelter if you need assistance, perhaps they can recommend a better therapist or a rape survivors group.
2007-01-10 20:49:16 · answer #10 · answered by iampatsajak 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sweetie, you should really think more serious about abortion the turaum of having this child could cause you to have a breakdown. No it is not your fault and I hope you pressed charges, but carrying this baby will be with you for life. At least think about adoption
2007-01-10 20:49:34 · answer #11 · answered by iseemen 5 · 0⤊ 5⤋