My 25 year old (younger) brother has been in jail many times. He can't handle alcohol and does drugs at times and even sells them at times. He says he's addicted to that kind of lifestyle. He doesn't work and doesn't have a license to drive until he takes a class because he has a couple of DUIs and recently totalled three vehicles in a 5 week period. He's cost my parents so much money and grief and heartache. He has a grim outlook for life and needs help...desperately. He won't go to the local rehab center again. He's been before. He gets violent when drinking or on drugs. He yells and cusses you and calls you the worst things you've ever heard. His mind is deranged when he messes with substances. He is gentle and loveable and comical when he's not messing with that stuff, but those good times are rare. We had to throw him out of the house recently and I am scared of him now. It's awful to be afraid of your own brother. is anyone else going through this and how do you handle it
2007-01-10 11:27:32 · 3 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Wow, I am so sorry you are going through this. And your brother too. I was the one who was the sibling in and out of jail, been to prison twice, drugs, dealing, the "lifestyle" you described was mine. I am trying so hard now to be clean. Its been a few months now. I have moved to another state. It is so hard. I miss the life but also hate it. Life is so dull now, like someone took out the 100 watt bulb and put in a 40 watt. I dont know what to tell you. I caused my family pain also. Never on purpose. No one can or will change unless they are removed from the scene for a period of time, and they have to have even a little desire to change. It is still so hard. I want to want to. Does that make sense to you? Just one thing, Love him no matter what. Always love him. He will find his own path in his own time, but he will always want your love no matter how he acts or what he does. Believe me. I am him.
2007-01-12 16:48:35 · answer #1 · answered by wild 1 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't personally have one, but I want to make sure to say that it's VERY important he gets checked into rehab. Even if he refuses to go to the local one, send him to another one. If he doesn't do it, there's really no way to get him off the drugs, especially since he has convinced himself that he's addicted. If he still refuses, you have to kick him out of the house. Maybe it'll shock him into the fact that because of the drugs, he's lost his family. Tell him that if he kicks the habit, you'll take him back, but until then, he's not part of your family anymore.
2007-01-10 21:55:14 · answer #2 · answered by Kelly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's called tough love...he needs medial and psychological help....he'll probably have to hit rock bottom though before he seeks it...hopefully by then he won't be dead or in prison. You and your family cannot be enablers...you have to cut him off but be there if he needs help (that is, help getting into rehab, not $$$)
2007-01-11 23:02:14 · answer #3 · answered by Scott 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋