im really frustrated at my boyfriend right now...it seems that he doesnt have any sense to help out with the chores around the house. Its not like i ask him to do much...for example. I do the cooking, cleaning up afterwords, laundary, cleaning around the house...shopping for the groceries, and i only ask him once and a while to do small favors. I dont nag him because i know if i nag he wont do anything and he will just get mad. So, i usually just ask him once and sometimes he does it sometimes he dont. He treats me well, he is a great boyfriend otherwise but im just tired doing everything and then askinging him for a favor to help out a little bit and it doesnt get done. Not only is he doing this for me to help out..but for the cleanliness of the aparment. I dont mind doing things like this for him to take care of him...he takes care of me well otherwise...its just frustrating to do all the household duties and and clean up after him as well. How can i get my boyfriend ..cont..
2007-01-10 10:43:28 · 3 answers · asked by magickitty0621 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
how can i get my boyfriend to help out more and not seem like a nagging mom or anything? I just want a little bit of help once and a while, guys, what could i do to really strike it to you to get you to help without being a *****?
2007-01-10 10:45:03 · update #1
Talk to him about. Tell him that you feel that you have to sometimes take on more than you feel is fair. Find out if there are specific chores that he wouldn't mind doing and then have him do those all the time. My husband is great about making sure that he does his share because we are equalls.
Also when you do ask him to do something, get his attention first so that you both know that he heard you ask him. And then don't ask again. Let him do it when he can. Or, if there is a specific time that it needs to be done say that from the get-go. "Hon, I really need some help getting ready for our frinds coming over on Friday. Can you please vacuum the house by Friday morning?"
Always be specific, don't assume they understand what you really want. And communicate! Communication is the most importand part of a successfull relationship.
2007-01-10 11:08:45 · answer #1 · answered by Garfield 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sit him down & talk. Tell him "There are two people living here who contribute to any messes in the household; e.g. clothing strung about, dishes on table, sink. And who also eat here which requires grocery shopping, cooking & cleaning up after. Therefore, there should be two people who contribute positively to all chores."
Before the talk, make up a list of everything which needs to be done. Estimate a time for each chore. Add it up and divide by two. Tell him you expect him to do half. Then ask him which ones he would prefer doing. Discuss the frequency of doing chores. If he agrees, hold him to it.
If he won't agree to it or he does but doesn't follow thru then I suggest that you do only your own laundry & cook only for yourself. And stick with it.
You will also need to face up to the fact that he is lazy & inconsiderate and if you resent it now as I once did, it will only get worse as time goes on. Just think what it would be like if you married the guy & had children! He'd probably be going out with the guys so that he wouldn't have to watch you work around the house & I bet he would want you to work outside the house too.
He's a loser, hon, & you should dump him & find a nice, considerate boyfriend; they make great husbands.
2007-01-10 19:28:21 · answer #2 · answered by Judith 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
are you my girlfriend? lol. :-)
2007-01-10 19:13:37 · answer #3 · answered by Fitz 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋