I am scared of natural birth, even though I want to do it as it is the right thing for the baby. Can I get some feedback from other mums that have had natural birth and cesarians.
My closest friend is always complaining that she wants an operation to tighten her vaginal walls, as she said they were ruined giving birth naturally to her son, and that she and her husband dont enjoy sex as much anymore (She ripped from front to back when she gave birth and required many stiches).. Do you think she is exagerating, or is it really true, sex is an important part of my life aswell and I want to still be able to enjoy it, if I give birth nautrally. I am interested on your opinions and personal experiences as honest as possible please.
2007-01-10 10:09:17 · 12 answers · asked by jazyj 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
well i have three girls 7,4, and 2 and i am 20 weeks pregnant so obviously i am in full working order and thre is something there he still likes,,,lol.But anyway on a serious note i did ask both my doctor and my husband if things would and did go back to normal and my doctor said they would and my husband says they DID. I tore from front to back with my four year old (she weighed almost 10 lbs) and yes it took alot of stitches but everything is fine now.. good luck
2007-01-10 12:26:09 · answer #1 · answered by baby_angell_vt 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have had 3 kids at home, all natural. My first was 8 lbs, my 2nd was 9 lbs 11 oz, and my third was 9 lbs 1oz. I never ripped once with any of them. I am a 100 lb person when I am not pregnant, and people worried about me, but it was so easy. I have a formula that I started taking 5 weeks before I had my babies, that helps you stretch out down there so that you don't rip, or you rip very little, it's amazing! I am not sure of everything that is in the 5 week formula, but if you email me I can tell you my midwife's name and number and you could call and ask her. ( I don't want to publish her name all over the internet). As for the permanent stretching stuff, DON'T exercise for 6 weeks after your baby is born! A lot of people feel good, and so they think they can exercise. That is a lot of what causes permanent stretching. Also, do your keegles! I still enjoy sex very much, and I had 3 kids within 2 1/2 years, no twins! :)
wildhareswife@yahoo.com
2007-01-10 10:53:19 · answer #2 · answered by fungirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well anything is possible and yes it will stretch some but for most people is is not enough to really tell. My husband does not complain and trust me he is a sex addict!! I tore and it is likely if it is your first you will to. The stitches healed and everything was back to normal. It is fine and out of all the millions of women who have given birth naturally I bet there are only about 2-5 % that have that complaint. It is better to have a vaginal delivery for numerous reasons like better for baby, not a big surgery , and less complications and better recovery time. Also with a c-section you will have a scar that is forever!!
PS. I only know of about 5% of people who have bladder problems from child birth ...it is VERY unusual....plus most doc. will not let you have c-section unless it is necessary!!
2007-01-10 10:36:17 · answer #3 · answered by mommy of 2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should know that doing kegal excersizes help to strengthen the muscles that tighten the vaginal walls, so if she's too "loose" after childbirth for her liking it has little to do with the stretch, and more to do with lack of toning. Tearing is definitly a scare and a risk of vaginal delivery, but the doctor's have a good handle on it and you'll be back to new before you know it. Doing your kegals and doing paraneal massage with olive oil will help to avoid this.
I've given birth naturally and granted sex was a little different the first time we did it (about 6 weeks after I gave birth) it wasn't less pleasurable. I just kept up with my kegals daily and I'm not any more loose then i was before, probibly more toned then I was before even.
2007-01-10 10:37:53 · answer #4 · answered by Gig 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's over exaggerating!! Sometimes you can tear from pushing and sometimes they have to cut you a little so the baby will come out easier and sometimes you don't tear, rip or have to cut you at all. I've never heard of anyone ripping from front to back (not to sure what she meant). Also i've never heard of anyone having a operation to tighten vaginal walls!! Things actually go back to normal after you have a baby. The only thing that doesn't go back to natural size is the uterus. If it was as bad as your friend is making it out to be then women would stop at one child instead of having 2,3,4,5 etc... If your friend and her husband don't enjoy their sex life anymore it prolly has to do with her attitude or like you say exaggeration.
2007-01-10 10:46:51 · answer #5 · answered by Curious J. 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I gave birth naturally twice once 13 yrs ago to my first child and then 7 months ago to my second child. Most people will rip during delievery and if it is going to be excessive more often then not the dr will cut you {which is what happened with my first child} Your friend is full of crap her husband doesnt enjoy sex with her for another reason. My husband enjoys sex just the same as he always has. Dont be scared its worth it in the end oh and I was stitched both times
2007-01-10 10:33:37 · answer #6 · answered by texas_angel_wattitude 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well I don't know where you live, but here in America our doctors can give you a episotomy to help with the delivery of the baby. I was give once the first time and I tore the second time. I'm not floppy down there, and it's not the same as it was, but your friend must be lying, because I had two big babies, and nothing like that happened. Don't worry, doing a c-section will only worsen your recovery time
2007-01-10 10:39:53 · answer #7 · answered by fourcheeks4 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i had a c-section, not by choice. But I'm glad I did. it was over in 20 minutes and although the recovery was longer than for a natural birth, I don't have to worry about bladder control problems later in life like some moms do from delivering natural. Also my scar is a lot smaller than you think it would be. AND I didn't get torn to shreads. I am happy it turned out that way.
2007-01-10 10:32:49 · answer #8 · answered by Kiss My Shaz 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
No offense, don't listen to your friend. I had four children, my first was with an epideral and it was terrible. I had no feeling and no control, so I had an epesiotomy that ripped and I had 33 stitches. Yes down there!! Three natural and only a few stitches and much better recovery. Yes it hurts but you will feel so much better after it is over. Good Luck!
2007-01-10 12:04:04 · answer #9 · answered by Hudson Valley Ceremonies 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's possible but unlikely.
I've given birth naturally 3 times, never ripped and am not stretched out. This is so TMI but dh is happier now than he was before kids. It's very resiliant down there, heck childbirth is what it was made for.
Good Luck.
2007-01-10 10:35:19 · answer #10 · answered by Wanting a Ferret 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋