What are the stages you go through after losing a special person in your life?

Question

How do feelings of loss progress?

Answer 1

I studied some Psycology during my midwifery training and i can remember relating to the 5 stages of grief as outlined by Elsabeth Kubler-Ross because i had lost someone close to me who passed away around that time of terminal cancer.

The 5 stages are - Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance.

Denial - When i learned of my uncle's terminal illness i did not truly believe he was going to die. I blanked the situation out of my mind and told myself he was going to get better.

Anger - I then became very anxious and angry that the doctors were not doing enough for him and that they should be treating him faster, in the hope that he would beat this illness and was angry that no one would liten to me!

Bargaining - I prayed to god that he would be ok and that he would fight the illness and eventually beat it.

Depression - I couldnt help him get better, i felt helpless and depressed.

Acceptance - The illness took him quickly and i never truly accepted that he was going to leave me until the day he passed away

If you have a think about each stage you may be able to relate to them in your own way regarding your own situation. I hope this is of some help to you.

Answer 2

Many people always associate loss with death and this may well be your case, if it is I am very sorry for that. You will go through four phases of what they call the Grief Wheel which is made up like this Shock, Protest, Disorganisation and then finally Reorganisation, you can find this on any web-site if you put in The Grief Wheel and it will explain what the four phases mean, as its rather a long explanation. Please read these words I hope you can try and draw some comfort from them:-

Don`t hurry grief - just take your time and know that love lives on with every thought and every pain and every hour gone.

Don`t analyse the way you feel, accept that you feel low, the wound of grief is very deep and must have time to heal.

No-one can ever take from you the memories within, so hug them close and let them grow for eventually the memories will win.

With my best wishes - Julie

Answer 3

I am assuming that you are talking about death (though a divorce etc comes very close) - I have lost someone recently and I went through guilt (was not there always) - anger (why did you die!) - paranoia (I have same thing - everyone I love is going to die the same way etc!), depression (why should I bother), Comfort eating / not eating depending on what mood I was in - Anxiety attacks/ Panic attacks, total deflation and loss of confidence (this happened in the first 6 months), after that I was able to start celebrating what was good about that person, about the gifts we shared, outlook got a lot more positive; decided to take charge of my life. Now I am able to talk about it and listen to other people without getting too upset (2 years later) - it does take time - especially if you were really close

Answer 4

There are no stages, everyone goes through there own stages and its the level of acceptance that takes us forward and our denial that keeps us stuck there. My mother died 22 years ago and I got divorced 2 years later. I didnt accept both losses until I was ready to. I cried more for my ex, but that's because he is still living, I accepted my mothers death more readily because death is final and I still held hope for my ex. Not any more though, I have finally moved on.

Answer 5

almost. (on the least i can do a life like "make-in good structure" pastime) yet i'd have a tendency to placed the stages previously. Denial - "i'm not having severe doubts. i'm a superb, believing Christian." Anger - "AARRGGH! Why am I searching this so complicated? If that's genuine it really is going to be sparkling and obtrusive! different each and every man or woman is so satisfied and untroubled!* " Bargaining - Prayer, with fasting and tears, asking God for some recognize-how of a thanks to make each and every thing make experience. melancholy - Have i really been going so incorrect for see you later? How am i able to face my Christian friends? How am i able to placed a sparkling philosophy or worldview mutually? attractiveness - nicely apparently like I even might want to renounce on theism, if i'm to stay honest with myself, so enable's see the position this leads. *i became a lot fooled, on the time, through the "solid fronts" that different Christians placed on, (felt they had to placed on?)

Answer 6

My dear brother died 5 yrs ago we were very good friends and couldn't be separate from each other, we share so many things together but unfortunately he died at the age of 34 I was 29 yrs, and the pain was so much that I decided to get strengh from inside. And the way I didn't was not to think of him at all nor have a picture of him in my house, and believe me that worked. Now after 5 yrs. I feel ok. And now I can think of all those memories and even have his pic in my house.

Answer 7

The stages are:

1. Denial - The "This can't be real" stage.: "This is not happening to me. There must be a mistake."
2. Anger - The "Why me?" stage.: "How dare you do this to me?!" (either referring to God, the deceased, or oneself)
3. Bargaining - The "If I do this, you’ll do that" stage.: "Just let me live to see my son graduate."
4. Depression - The "Defeated" stage.: "I can't bear to face going through this, putting my family through this."
5. Acceptance - The "This is going to happen" stage.: "I'm ready, I don't want to struggle anymore."

If you want more information about the kubler theory of Death, research the book "On Death and Dying"

Answer 8

everyone is so different on so many different levels that you can't say 'it'll be like this', even for the majority of people.

at it's most basic there are probably two, before and after acceptance. for a long time you'll 'realise' the person has gone, whether it's seeing something that reminds you or noticing something and thinking you'll mention it to them before remembering they're gone. one day it changes, and you think of them as gone without having to realise it again. personally i don't think that's 'getting over' it so much as 'getting used to it'. at it's most base it's another experience that shapes you and who you are.

the thing to remember is that everyone is different and reacts differently. also everyone goes through a completely different set of emotions and feelings, probably THE most extreme they'll experience in their life. most importantly that means that no feeling you have is wrong. whether it's anger, fear, whatever, it's not WRONG, it's part of the process.

if you're asking for personal reasons all the best to you.

Answer 9

upset, anger, loss of appitite,frustration,walking round,sense of misfortune and sometimes depression.
please dont ask the whats whys and wheres as this can make you worse try to remember the good time the laughs the special things they did when they came into you life,trust me iv been there.

Answer 10

Do you mean if they died because if you do than just when you are about to cry just think of some good memories that you have had with that someone. Sorry for your lost if that is what you mean P.S E-mail me at [e-mail]