Would you tell you husband that he's a mamma's boy.?

Question

He always seems to have to confirm the same question with his mother even if I have given him the same answer his mother has givenhim an hour later. I feel like nothing I do is right! But his mother is perfect

Answer 1

He's probably just so used to his mother babying him and taking care of him that he really can't make decisions for himself. If that's the case you will never be up there with his mom. The best thing to do about that is to just brush it off and act like you don't give a crap. Then when he asks for your opinion again, tell him to go ask his mama.

Answer 2

I know how frustrating that can be-mine was. We are still married, she passed away a year ago. The thing is, you probably shouldn't tell him. It won't change anything, and it will only cause problems with all 3 of you. If you really love him, try not to be obvious about how much it bothers you unless it is causing a conflict.....as long as she isn't meddling with those decisions/questions/major life stuff it really isn't hurting anything. My husband is really a good guy, and because I didn't heed the advice I'm giving you he still harbors some resentment towards me because he thinks I "hated" his mother, and now she's gone. Think about this situation long and hard-she's been there from day one, and would be there even if you weren't. The dynamic of their relationship was formed long before you knew him, and nothing you do or say will have much an effect on that. But complaining about something you cannot change can cause stress between you and him.....if it's really worth it to you, and you think it will make a difference, then atleast choose your words carefully-because she won't be around forever, and those words will come back to haunt you.

Answer 3

My husband use to be the same way when we first moved in together...he was making hamburger helper and I asked him to put extra noodles in so it would make more and we could have lunch the following day. He asked what he had to do and I told him just add some more water and milk...he called his mom and asked her. she said the same thing. Now he trusts that I am right and know something....just be open with him...don't call him a mamma's boy...it would be the start of something that would never end and you would not be happy.

Communication is the best way to solve problems between two people. Just sit down and talk calmly and respectfully and in short sentances for a short period of time and see what happens.

Answer 4

Yes I would tell him! My first husband was a mama's boy, and when we were engaged, he didn't want to move out of his mama's house because he didn't want her to stop doing his laundry--you need to get this out in the open right now! Let him know that you feel unimportant in comparison to his mother. Communicate how you are feeling to him and let him know that it is becoming a big problem in your relationship. Let him know that his constant "running to his mommy" is affecting the marriage and that he needs to set the boundries. Having mom involved is ok, but a man is to marry and leave the home--not bring the mother with him! You have to communicate this to him, or your marriage will end up like mine--in divorce!!

Answer 5

My mother always told me there is nothing wrong with marrying a Mama's boy because they have been taught to respect and love a woman, that is so true, my husband adored his mom and I am so glad he did. She did not make it long after we were married and I got upset a couple of times yes, but she was a great person and a good mother. My husband adored her and has MANY happy memories of her and I am so glad now that I quit bickering with him and let him have the best of everything. It did not hurt me to share him with his mom and I learned alot from her myself.

Answer 6

Sounds like he's still leaning on her too much. You may want to tell him that his actions bug you but calling him a "Mama's boy" even if he acts like one, isn't going to help your case. I'd suggest saying something like, "You know, it seems to me like you need to get a second opinion from your mother, everytime you ask me a question? Is it that you don't trust me? Or what's the deal?"

Some counseling may be in order also. Just a few thoughts! Good luck!!

Answer 7

What good will telling him do? It is just going to cause a fight. By labeling his behavior, you put him on the defensive. Instead, try owning your own feelings. I usually get better results when I try something like this..."I know it is probably just me, but when you do X it makes me feel Y. Can you help me figure out a way that we can approach this that works for both of us?" Men love to "fix" things for the women in their life. And they hate to feel like they are being attacked. Instead of putting him on the defense, you give him the chance to be your hero.

Answer 8

no i wouldnt tell him hes a mommas boy. im sure that him doing this is really annoying but you could look at it as a good thing since he respects his mothers opinion. as long as hes not allowing her to make decisions as far as when he should go to the bathroom or anything to that degree, i would just leave it alone. im pretty sure that when ever his mother passes(god forbid) that you will take over the position. it will bring you two closer.

Answer 9

Don't be getting upset by this, he obviously thinks his mum is wise. Try to not be hurt by this, instead, always say later, " wow your mum and i think alike", praise his mum, it will take a little time, but he will come to the conclusion after a while, that you are both wise and think in a similar manner. and eventually you will be the one he comes to first. don't criticise him, it will only cause a fight, just go about making a good friend of his mum, he will be happier, you will feel less conflicted and eventually he will put his mum after you. I t's a hard spot to be in, but remember he loves you both.

Answer 10

I have told my hubby a million times that he is a mamma's boy for the very same reasons. i finally got fed up & said who keeps ur bed warm at night, cleans after you and pleasures you? whos done that for the past 22 yrs? meeeeeeeeeee so i know u best now i am right!