My fiance was 'caught' dropping an employye's wife off. The thing is when her husband called she lied as where she was and with whom. If it was all innocent, why lie?
After this, I insisted on no contact. Two days before New Years, a text came in on his phone- that I had- 'hi honey. you were trying to call me. call me now.'
Since it did not have a name to the number, I called and asked him. He said he didn't know. I called the number the person said 'hello' I asked who it was and the person hung up. I recognised the voice so I called her husband and he confirmed that that was her new number.
My now fiance is insisting that nothing has happened between them. I am trying to just put it all behind me. But I don't know how. I don't trust him. I need to know where he is all the time. It is making him frustrated, and me even more so.
I have a four month old son, we are in the process of finding land for building a home, etc. What do I do???
2007-01-10 04:51:26 · 9 answers · asked by stacy 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You can learn to trust again, but it is a slow slow, daily process that takes a long time. The person regaining the trust has to prove their self daily and it is a hard road back, but it can be done. You will learn to trust, but you will always be suspicious and I mean always because you can forgive, but one can never forget.
2007-01-10 05:07:59 · answer #1 · answered by Premo Mom 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sorry you're going through this with a 4 month old. Unfortunately, the "hi honey" text message would have been a deal breaker with me. The rest of the text said "you were trying to call me, call me now". Did he admit that he called her? What was his reason for contacting her? It's too gray to me and I would go with my instincts if I were you.
I agree with the other answers. You should put the wedding and land purchase on hold until you clear this whole thing out. The last thing you want to do is marry a man whom you're already having doubts about. Take some time to think and maybe go see a counselor. Couples counseling would be good idea. Good luck!
2007-01-10 05:28:16 · answer #2 · answered by jazz_lover_25 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You pretty much have a good idea about what is going on. If you need proof, hire a P.I. or go in on a P.I. with this lady's husband. I feel so sorry that you have such a young child with him. Cancel future plans with wedding and house. I know it is incredibly hard because you have a child with him, but think of the future. Can you really trust him if you get married? You will be tied to him financially especially with property and debt. What if more kids come along and some day you end up with some STD because he cheated on you? It is so much easier now than later. Good luck.
2007-01-10 05:02:10 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well your answers are in front of you, There is something going on or he would have told you hes dropping off this person and allowing to to be a part of this, at least he would be upfront. Even after he said nothing happened still contact continues. Hes hiding something confront again and get your point across and your feelings, if he dont respond and continues to deny you know that its more than he says. Dont wait to lnog and get trapped into a siutation that might get worse.
2007-01-10 05:54:12 · answer #4 · answered by P_a94 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would suggest that you postpone the wedding, and buying land, until this is all settled. I think the "hi honey" text message makes it clear that something is going on. It would be a good idea for you to talk to a counseler to help you decide what to do next.
2007-01-10 05:02:53 · answer #5 · answered by Faith 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love him give hime the benefit of the doubt and let it pass. Begin showing him respect unconditionally and watch how things turn around. Men need rspect more than they desire love. GIve him that and he will be all yours in no time. Read the book LOVE AND RESPECT by DR EMERSON EGGERICHS. THis book is brilliant and many marriages have been saved because of it. Good luck to you both
2007-01-10 05:26:24 · answer #6 · answered by uniquechild 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe your fiance hasn't done anything wrong and was just helping out a friend....Not all me cheat...my only question is are 100% sure that he cheated on you with this woman...and if you are...can you get passed it and move on with your life!
2007-01-10 05:04:03 · answer #7 · answered by Ŗεŋεε 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO NO NO once the trust has gone out of a relationship you don't have a relationship becuae that is the main source of the relationship.TRUST..
2007-01-10 04:56:29 · answer #8 · answered by gblue52 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The "hi honey, call me now" says it all.
2007-01-10 05:13:55 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋