I don't want to hurt his feelings. His father and I have been separated for about 2 years now and the baby I am carrying is from my current mate. My 17 year old and current mate don't really mingle because I do not want to force my son to mingle with him. My ex and I had a bad separation. I had a restraining order, but did not fully comply because I didn't want to deny my son the right to see his father. I am confused and don't know what the correct way to tell him would be.....
2007-01-10 04:49:46 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Well, you could always wait until you're in labor and ask him to drive you to the hospital!
You have waited *7 months*!?! You need to work on your backbone, dear. I can totally identify with you, so I don't mean to sound judgemental. I'm the same way.
When the two of you are alone, say, "Honey, I'm pregnant. It's a boy/girl, and I'm due ______". Then ask for his thoughts and feelings, listen until he's totally spent, and validate everything he says. Don't defend yourself, but don't feel guilty. Just becuse you have him doesn't mean you shouldn't have others. However, he's already lost a dad, partly a mom (to the new guy), and now will lose most of his mom to her new family with the new baby. Ya know?
Good luck.
2007-01-10 05:03:09 · answer #1 · answered by Margie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What I am impressed with, is that you are 7 months and not showing! Congratulations. As for your teenager, you should have told him a long time ago. Now, it will be, Oh, by the way, you'll have a new sibling in 2 months. He could have been a great support for you this whole time. You need to sit him down and TALK to him. He must know you love him - you allowed him to see his father. He will probably be hurt, maybe even angry at first, but he will probably come around. You sound like a very good mom. Enjoy your new baby. Your first baby might just surprise you.
2007-01-10 13:00:08 · answer #2 · answered by momof3cuties 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your 7 months and haven't told him yet. You need to set down and talk to him now if he hasn't figured it out already. You need to set him down and talk to him like he is an adult not a little kid. My boyfriend told his 16 year old daughter as soon as he found out I was expecting a baby and she and I had never met up until 1 month or so ago. But she accepted it. I'm sure your son will be fine, if anything he will be more hurt that you waited so long to tell him.
2007-01-10 13:48:31 · answer #3 · answered by racehorsegal 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I personally think that when you both are in a good mood and getting along you should just say I know that this is last minute and all but... I have something to tell you...you're going to be an older brother, and just say he/she will look up to you....you will be his/her idol or maybe even hero! I know that this isn't exactly how you would've wanted me to tell you but I had to tell you sometime. Maybe even he could help you name the baby.
P.S. how did he not figure out that you were 7 months pregnant, do you wear really baggy shirts or sweatshirts or something?
2007-01-10 13:01:27 · answer #4 · answered by iloveyouu<3 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seven months? I'm sure he has noticed already.Maybe take him out for a special lunch and just tell him straight out near the end of the lunch. If you were worried about him possibly disapproving, you should not have become pregnant, use more reliable birth control. Hopefully you are in a secure, trusting relationship where you both will care for the new baby.
2007-01-10 12:56:38 · answer #5 · answered by nanny4hap 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Wow Im 7 months and huge. I cant imagine not being able to tell, but let me say, I'd be more hurt finding out you are 7 months pregnant and never told me. So I think it is a good idea to go ahead and tell him now. Its getting closer and closer to the time for the baby to come. Time is running it out to tell him.
2007-01-10 12:59:43 · answer #6 · answered by Blondi 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him the truth. Do not put it off any longer. The longer you put it off. The more he is gonna wonder why. If you just be honest with him. He should understand. But I think you should have told him sooner. He would have had more time to adjust. Ya know? Try and do something with you and your mate, and your son together. That may make them get closer. But It still may take awhile. But do not push him. Just let him do it himself. But just be honest with your kids on everything.
2007-01-10 13:09:56 · answer #7 · answered by Melinda 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take him to a movie this weekend and then to good restaurant for a dinner. Before the food comes start the topic and tell him. I hope he will understand your situation. Still he doesn't understand and wishes to go back to his father then leave the things there. Let him go and you start your life a fresh. You've got the right to live the way you like it.
2007-01-10 12:57:07 · answer #8 · answered by Kiran 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes you waited 7 months, however it is your decision to tell him. However you do not want to wait till it is too late. Just explain to him what happened and ask him even though your current mate and him do not get along ask him to at least try and welcome this newest bundle of joy coming into both of your lives. Tell him what is in your heart though and don't hold back because the more you hold back the worse it could get.
2007-01-10 13:07:23 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well there are 2 ways to handle this you can lie to him and then he will find out when it comes or you can be honest with him,sounds like you,re not giving the kid much credit,talk to him ask him how he feels about the boyfriend they might just like each other not as father and son but maybe as friends they might have something in common as for the child it would be better to tell him about it BEFORE! it is born, just tell him you want to talk about something , he just might up and ask you if you are pregnant.
2007-01-10 13:00:30 · answer #10 · answered by leather_2000_27203 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋