What Makes A Parent "Unfit"?

Question

My kids have always lived with me. Their biological father and I were never married or living together, and he only sees them a couple of times a year. He makes no effort to see them..his family does. But he'll defend to the death his "rights" as a parent. It's all about control.
To be frank, I don't think he deserves any rights, and I want them taken away. I know he smokes marijuana and drinks. When I knew him he used to steal things from the local store. And right now he's in jail for 30 days for not paying child support.
My question is, if I was going to try to have ALL his rights taken away, would the prison sentence alone be enough to make him "unfit" in a judge's eyes? Or would I have to hire a PI to prove the drug use and other things as well?

Answer 1

You can't just go to court with accusations. You have to have proof. Hire an investigator to do a background check and to get current information on him. You may even need to have this guy followed for a while to document his actions and routine (after he gets out of jail, of course). If you go to court unprepared, you may not get a second chance to prove him as unfit, so go in as prepared as you can be.
Good luck.

Answer 2

Being unfit could be several different definitions. If someone is actively using illegal substances and if you can prove it, the person is unfit. If they are abusive or neglectful, they are unfit.

Get all your documentation in order and you should be able to have a lawyer help you will getting full custody for your children.

A prison sentence alone will not be viewed as a parent being unfit. They take into consideration of what the crime was.

Many people can turn around completely and clean themselves up. Many people deserve a second chance. However, it doesn't sound like this man will be making any changes for the better anytime soon.

My husband is in prison for past drug use and has been clean even before he had to go back to prison. The drug addiction will always be there, but it does not mean they are using. A person with a drug addiction needs to find skills to cope with cravings and other avenues to keep clean, but it's up to the person.

Answer 3

all you really need is someone that knows him and will testify that he does drugs. also if he does not pay support he can get his right to visits taken away anyway. the judge will see all of this when in court. he will have to prove you unfit and that is almost impossible unless he has some really bad photos of you doing wrong. he also would have to prove he was the father since you were never living together or married. that takes money, and he don't sound as if he is that well off.

Answer 4

Most likely, if you report drug use, they'll do a test. Even if he finds out beforehand, it hardly matters- he won't stay off it. People like to say MJ isn't addictive but in truth, I have known people to quit caffiene, crack, coke, meth, pills, and even cigarettes- but I have never known of anyone quitting pot.

I'm in a similar situation with my son's bio dad. He makes no effort to contact- just sends gifts at birthday. But he's 500 miles away so I do't care too much.

If your kids are old enough to care, then their opinion does matter. So ask some discreet questions (Would you like to see Dad more often? Do you have fun with him?) first. Then get a lawyer. Do not get a cheap lawyer. Get a decent lawyer. He will tell you for certain if you'll need a PI or not, and will probably reccomend the right one if so- after all, he has probably worked with many and knows which are good.

Answer 5

I can honestly tell you from expierance you must go by the rules of your state And a prison sentance alone will not do it you need to document everything from arguments abuse when he sees the kids and report every nonpayment of support. you document when his family has gotten the children and when he has gotten the children because he could and will use the well when my family got them i seen them then story. You need to write everything down and I used just a basic notebook from walmart carry it with you at all times because you will need dates and times in it. It is a long process and then if he doesnt pay his support and goes to jail for a good while you can do what I did hire an attorney and give him this option work with the state and see if he will give up his rights to the children for a get out of jail cheaper card. Good luck and if you need extra support email me at [e-mail]

Answer 6

You will need something documented to prove the drug use and it still may not be enough. Judges aren't too fond of dead beat dads anyway and if he doesn't have an attorney and you do...you might be able to. If you can also show that your children are in harms way when he does see them, at the very least you can push for supervised visits. Remember though that your kids need a father, even if its twice a year...

Answer 7

First, 2 considerable rules: a million. Set the occasion of the guy you desire your toddler to grow to be-remeber the previous anti-drug commercial- mothers and dads who use drugs have chideren who use drugs. That applies to each element of elevating childeren. If a be certain beverages to extra, so will the youngster; if aparent beats their important different, so will the youngster; if a be certain cusses and swears, so will the youngster. Conversely. if a be certain shows recognize to others, so will the youngster; if a be certain votes often, so will the youngster; if a be certain volunteers to help contained locally, so will the youngster. 2. Be in touch interior the childs life and activities, make each and every attempt to tutor at up be certain instructor conferences, be in touch in scouting with your toddler, no longer purely be there for soccer video games and gymnastic meets yet make the practices as much as attainable. My daughter replaced right into a gymnast and that i hardly neglected a prepare and under no circumstances neglected a meet. that does no longer propose you are able to desire to take on the region of being a coach or chief, purely be there. I relatively have seen too many disapointed faces at those issues as a results of fact mom and/or dad did no longer ensue. different issues to bear in mind- Ask questions-the place are you going? who's going to be there? whilst are you coming abode? etc. call and be certain the solutions. ensue unanounced irregularly that way the youngster does not understand whilst mom and/or dad will seem. attempt to sidestep snooping till you're easily optimistic they're attempting to cover something. believe yet be certain. I instructed my babies there is not any longer something extra considerable than coaching. Homework got here first after college, then play time or spectacular out with buddies. and specific maximum mandatory-HAVE a humorousness!!! And whilst issues go undesirable and that they'll, you are able to desire to assert someting like this" i'm relatively mad at you presently, yet I nonetheless love you." i'm a unmarried dad and that i raised 3 childeren, 2 sons and a daughter. All 3 have graduated intense college and went directly to submit intense college coaching. I under no circumstances had a situation with ingesting, smoking, teenager intercourse, drugs, or any of the subject concerns linked with the teenager years. i like to think of it replaced into as a results of fact i replaced into so vigilant.

Answer 8

Truthfully, if you have the money, hire a PI and get documented evidence against the father. You don't want someone like that around your children! Good Luck!

Answer 9

It would take alot to make a person unfit in the judge's eyes, because htere is ALWAYS supervised visitation.