i get rejected in class...?

Question

In classes i sit with some people who i think will include me...and then, no one talks to me, not even the people who i thought would include me...i get really embarrased because its easy for everyone around me to notice that i've barely got any friends. what should i do to make it less noticeable?

Answer 1

Dear, it must be really hard on you. I do not know exactly your situation, but it sounds a lot like what I've been through just some years back.

It's difficult to get people to be interested in you, but the easiest way to do that is to get interested in others first. I know you may think 'how to be interested in others when they seem unwilling to talk to me or hang out with me?'. Sometimes if you keep your mouth shut all the time, people may read you as arrogant and stuck up. Start with a confident and friendly smile. Take an interest in others eg find stuff to compliment others on like that's a cute bag where did you get it from. Start with small talk. Gradually you'll find people you can click with. Gradually people will start to take an interest in you.

But don't expect anything from others at all and you will be surprised. Go with the flow, dare to be yourself.

Speaking of which, I understand it can be tough to be almost friendless in a class where many people know who you are. Pressure of the clique. But as I personally found, nobody actually go around noticing people who are loners. Trust me, people don't take that great notice of others especially not their close friends. Sometimes, the more you try to hide your own perceptions from others, the more you flinch and stuff like that and that attracts unnecessary attention.

Perhaps the thing getting you down is that negative judgmental voice inside yourself. Why do you find it 'embarasing' to be without a clique? Read your situation in a positive way -you are independent. Turn your stituation around within yourself. Remember: nobody is watching you after all so don't worry. Even if they see you alone, so what? They are just being shallow if they brand you as a loner and feel superior just because they are popular. You are just independent.

I am not sure if you are Christian but if you are, believe that God will provide and what you are going through may be part of his will and plan for you. God loves you and he is there with you. Pray. And more practically, go join a christian youth group to learn more about God (and hone your social skills too). I find that people who have that love in them are just happier and hence more well liked. Learn to love others and you will be \fee loved.

It's the pain of growing up. You will live past it don't worry.

Oh, you may want to give this classic a try -How to win friends and influence people by Dale Carnegie. It sounds tacky but believe me it's a very useful and motivating book. It's been a best seller for more than half a century. It helped me a lot in getting out of situations like yours.

All the best and love. Good luck and smile always!

Answer 2

I felt like that too Seashell, and I felt like I was always ignored or a 'wall flower'. I found out I had low-self esteem. I took some classes last semester in college. I wish I would have the knowledge then that I have now. Do things to make yourself feel good - not to please others. Take some time each day to do something for yourself to feel good for you; paint your nails & toes, different hair styles, get a make over at the mall, do it for yourself. Continue studying to be the best you can be. It helps you later in life when it's most important and it when guys really appreciate and admire the ones with the brains - hold your head up and know that your all that and who cares what others think as long as you know your nice to everyone. Good luck!!

Answer 3

That is another way of explaining the perception of the majority of the people regarding the occupy movement and why the people involving themselves with it should just leave/go away/go back and concentrate of bettering their own lives and being a goddammnuisance /eyesores. The class warfare rhetoric has been attempted to incite dissatisfaction and angst, and while all this was part of the design to orchestrate passion to be manipulated and played on to gain re election in 2012, there is a much more sinister underlying probability of attempting to destroy America from within the hearts of its own people.

Answer 4

If you are loud, tone it down. If you are quiet, speak up. If you are clingy, back off. If you frown alot, smile more. If you are snappy, try to have more patience. If you are judgemental, try to remember that most judgements are wrong. You can be yourself, but if you want friends, you have to give people a reason to want to get to know you. Give them something they can go "hmm....cool" about. Everyone hated me in my school, until senior year. That's when I decided that if they did not want to be my friend, I did not need them. Believe me...once you get out of school, it's a whole new ball game.

Answer 5

Well just do your thing in class, don't worry about it... If you act like you know all the answers to the class homework, they will so be your friends... But don't worry to much if they don't talk to you..

Answer 6

Don't be embarrassed that you don't have many friends:) if they don't want to be your friend then forget them concentrate on the friends you already have. If you still want to try to be friends with them try talking to them first that may help!
Good Luck!

Answer 7

You're just not outgoing enough, act hyper and pretend like you're not shy and interact in conversations.

Answer 8

friends with others share your secrets to others do good to others with no returns and make them smile to ear in other section make friends

Answer 9

YOU ARE THERE TO BE EDUCATED LET THAT BE THE ONE THING THAT MOTIVATES YOU..YOU WILL MAKE FRIEND EVENTUALLY JUST DONT LET IT STRESS YOU NOW.