2007-01-09 14:01:20 · 9 answers · asked by What_A_Gass 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Don't stop being nice, just don't bend over backwards. If you have to say no than help by giving suggestions on how they can get what they need.
Big tip here: Never say "no problem" or "of course" or even "you're welcome" say "you would do the same for me" - it subconsiously sets in their mind that they owe you a favor. Your people pleasing will start to pay off.
2007-01-09 14:07:10 · answer #1 · answered by Bored Enough To Be Here 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm definitely a people pleaser. Part of it, I realized, is because I like making other people happy. I don't think people like us should necessarily stop making others happy, but when it gets to a point where you are being taken advantage of and you start to get hurt, then you have to pull away and realize that you also have to think of yourself. Even though we're givers, we have to be good to ourselves as well. As long as you're not getting hurt, continue being nice to others and making their day a little brighter :)
2007-01-09 14:10:30 · answer #2 · answered by Chelsea 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In order to not be a people pleaser you have to have good boundaries with people. If you do not there are people who will take advantage of you. You set boundaries by saying "no" to those who are trying to manipulate or take advantage of you. If you think you have to say yes to everyone or they will not like you, than you will lose your identity because you cannot please everyone. Stay true to your values, you only have so many resources and when they are gone they are gone. Saying no will protect you from getting depleted emotionally.
2007-01-09 14:17:29 · answer #3 · answered by mjohnson1422 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No way to try to be a people pleaser. You will be the only displeased one, if you try too hard
2007-01-09 14:08:18 · answer #4 · answered by PikC 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
To your first question; I believe that we all do things sometimes to gain the approval of others (even when we may not realize it)..
To your second question; I think that you do have to be wise when it comes to being generous. I say that because you cannot please everyone and people can be ungrateful at times. There are also people who would try to take advantage of your generosity. So you would just have to be careful and learn to say no sometimes. Mind you, I'm not saying become mean-spirited though. I hope that answers your question.
2007-01-09 14:33:49 · answer #5 · answered by Shaniqua R 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I try very hard to please people but I do not dwell on it if they are not happy with what I do for them.
Some people are naturally not happy with anything you will ever do for them so with that in mind I move on and keep pleasing those who WILL BE happy with what I do for them.
A little appreciation goes along way. Those who are not appreciative will soon find themselves very lonely. It is life's way of being fair !!
: )
Happy Tuesday !!
2007-01-09 14:15:35 · answer #6 · answered by Kitty 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Try to be consistent, fair, and do what is right. Some people will try to take advantage of you...not everyone is as descent as you may be.
2007-01-09 14:09:55 · answer #7 · answered by P K 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The key word is no. Their feelings may be hurt but your feelings are more important
2007-01-09 14:14:51 · answer #8 · answered by Raphael M 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
YOU CAN ONLY PLEASE YOURSELF. YOU CAN HELP OTHERS TO THE EXTENT OF IF THERE NOT TRYING TO HELP THEMSELVES THEN YOU'LL FIND THAT YOUR ENABLING THEM TO ACTUALLY NOT EVEN TRY. SO BE NICE. BUT NOT AT YOUR EXPENSE.
2007-01-09 14:11:02 · answer #9 · answered by HADITDUN 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋