I have a Question for all the wives and mothers out there....?

Question

I'm not trying to be mean or sarcastic, I'm asking these questions in earnest...

Do you feel that getting married and having a family was a mistake? or was it the best thing you ever done?

Do you feel like the demands of being a wife and a mother hold you back from doing what you want in life? or do they make your life happy??

Answer 1

Of course your lifestyle changes....it's no longer just about "you".
Instead of it being about "ME" it becomes "WE"...

My perception of what life was all about changed dramatically when I had a child, certain things like going out clubbing were no longer important, the neighbourhood I was living in before having children needed to change for the well being of my children.

I don't think being married or having children stops one from doing things if a woman has a good support system in place. Single parenthood is a whole different ball game believe me!

I think one of the most important things is to make sure you've "had a life" before bringing another into this world. So many of my friends who married/had children young talk about the things they wanted to do but could not do because of marriage/family obligations.

I waited to have children until I was 27 and by then I had traveled the world and had many crazy adventures, by then I felt I was ready to settle down. My kids drive me crazy at times, but I wouldn't change a thing......(ok maybe the man I married but hey we all make "mistakes" ;) and my children were never a mistake because of the joy they bring me everyday :)

Answer 2

I feel that being married and having children was a wonderful decision and I wouldn't change a thing. I am glad I had my kids while I was young. I would not want to be in a position now that I had a young child (under the age of 8). My husband has two days off a week and the kids are in school so we get to spend the days just the two of us, which is wonderful. Also, I don't look at being a wife and mother as "demands" I see them as challenges and rewards. There are many many rewards.
L.

Answer 3

To be honest, a little of both.

To be a wife and mother is to give up some things, at least for a while. I would love to have a few minutes to myself sometimes (in the bathroom even) so I have given up some of myself.

I would have gone to college if I hadn't gotten pregnant (at 22, didn't know where my mother was so didn't qualify for any financial aid since I couldn't include her income until I was 24, or so the office told me). At this point, with young children who need me and the necessity of a FT job, I just can't take more time away from them for classes. So it held me back in that way.

I am ever grateful for my wonderful children and family. They are worth the price I have paid and am paying. I really think they have enlightened my life despite any hardships caused.

Edited to add that marriage has been a sacrifice too in some ways, as any relationship is. I wouldn't trade it though.

Hope this helps.

Answer 4

Sometimes I feel like I am tied down, but then I realize I have the most precious thing in the world. Family and love. Family is what life is all about. When I see really old people, I rarely see a couple that has made it through the years and when I do, I think God, that is what life is all about, finding your life partner, and becoming one with them. And nothing has ever made me happier and been more rewarding than being a mother. I would not give that up for all the money in the world.

Answer 5

I feel it was the best thing I've ever done. I do get frustrated from time to time, as any mother and wife would, because it can get pretty chaotic at times in my house! But it's also the best feeling in the world to me to feel so needed, and to see that all I do for the household has such a positive effect on everyone. And I don't feel it's holding me back. Actually, I'm thankful to be able to stay at home with my kids. I used to be a single parent who worked all the time and hardly ever got to see my kids. The last job I had was actually a service member in the Navy. My kids were always in day care, because my job was so demanding. Demanding to the point where I got injured and am now disabled (bad knees). But on a positive note, I met my husband while in the Navy, and we couldn't be happier together. My disability pay is like a second income, so we're not hurting, and he doesn't make me feel bad about staying at home. He respects and supports my decision. Plus, I get to spend a lot more time with my kids, which is a good thing now that they're in school. I could never participate in their classes if I were still working. But now, I can spend as much time with them as they'd like.

Answer 6

I am 45 and feel that I made poor choices in mates, though the children I have with my ex's were the best decisions I made.
I incorporated my children as a part of my life and my successes.
I would give anything for an honest companion at my age, but am going to put my children first until they are older. I am only held back in that area as the time constraints of a full-time job and being a full-time mother keep me from doing any dating.

Answer 7

I feel being married and having children has made my life better,My best accomplishment in life was having my children..
Of course at times its very demanding being a wife and mother, But It was certainly is worth it..My kids are both grown and married now..And now i have grandchldren, They make it all worth it..My Hubby,Kids and grandkids make me happy!

Answer 8

I started young so I think young women should get out and experience life first. I wouldn't change anything about my life, it's extremely rewarding, but I want my daughters to have a million more life experiences than just being a wife and mother. I want them to travel, learn, and love themselves first.

Answer 9

Having a family isn't a mistake. And alot of women I know wouldn't change it for anything, that they have have absolutely no regrets about getting married and having a kids and have never felt like they were held back.

Answer 10

A FAMILY ISINT A MISTAKE I DONT REGRET MY DAUGHTER BUT IF I COULD CHANGE THING AROUND I WOULD MARRIAGE IS NOT REALLY WHAT U THINK....SOME TIMES U HAVE TO STOP FROM DOING YOUR THING TO BE WITH YOUR HUSBAND OR FAMILY TIME FLYS AND THERE IS NO RETURN...:(