why does he not want to live with you? is it so he can live like he is single?? i would imagine it is,,,,,,,,, also some men do not want to work out the finances or feel they have something to lose if they divorce (besides the woman),. i personally would not stay married to a man who treated me this way,,,,,, nor to a man whom i wasnt living with,,,,,,, maybe he thinks by staying married that will allow him to return anytime he wishes,,,,,,,,,,, you need to think seriously about all this,,,,, if you allow him to treat you this way,,,,,, it will not get in better in the future,,,,,if he left you,, its best to lose him,,, and get a divorce,,,,,, hard i know,,,,,,,, but what possible security/trust would you be able to have with him?
2007-01-09 11:56:47
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answer #1
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answered by dlin333 7
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He's up to something! Tell him you want to know what's up. You have a right to know everything. This is your life! He owes you an honest and thorough explanation.
Ask him if he can think of any way to save the marriage--a vacation, counseling, etc. As a last resort, suggest a short separation to think of possible solutions!
If there are indeed irreconcilable differences--divorce may be the answer. Unfortunately, the commitment of marriage does not have the same value that it used to and should still have. You sound like you take your vows very seriously, maybe he just needs some help working out issues.
Remember, time heals all wounds and you will survive this. Chances are you will be a stronger and better you when this is all over---whichever way it goes!!
Good luck!
2007-01-09 19:56:30
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answer #2
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answered by kinzziegirl 2
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lol ive heard this from people married many years that would end up paying spousal support or huge amounts of child support. If he doesnt want to live with you in the same home as husband and wife then its time to get divorced. Dont put up with his crap honey let him know its all or nothing and stand your ground the more you give in the more he will take. maybe he's having an affair on the side why else would he not want to reside with you
2007-01-09 20:14:45
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answer #3
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answered by texas_angel_wattitude 6
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Let me explain my situation.....and you can judge if it compares to yours. I have been married for 21 years to my husband and it has come to the point where we cannot be in the same room without hurting each others feelings. We have agreed that the best thing for us to do is for me to move out for a year, both of us get counseling, then seek marriage counseling. If at that point we decide it is over, then we will seek a divorce.
2007-01-09 20:03:05
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answer #4
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answered by Deneen C 1
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he is saying that right now he doesn't want a divorce, but doesn't love u enough to stay with u, because of the obvious, he is seeing someone else and wants to be with her too. i would not allow him to do this, and come and go at his convenience, when he feels like it. he has become interested in something else, and wants to check it out and make sure it is going to work out before he actually asks u for a divorce. face the facts here, don't deny it, or u will not be able to see the truth. he is playing games with you, keeping u there for him, just in case he has no where else to go. time to get a divorce, u won't be able to stop him, he won't even listen to u, he seems to want to do whatever he wishes, no matter who it hurts.
2007-01-09 20:22:13
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answer #5
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answered by jude 7
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Tell him he can't have his cake and eat it too. Ask why he doesn't want to live with you if he wants to stay married. Tell him if there's a problem you need to work it, it isn't going to get worked out with him living somewhere else. If he wants it like this permanently just cuz he doesn't want to pay for a divorce or whatever, tell him to get over himself. Tell him you don't want a husband in name only.
2007-01-09 20:09:23
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answer #6
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answered by benjis.girl 3
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If he just wants to live apart and see you only for sex, then he's not ready to be a husband and to have any responsibilities. Its sad, and I hope you can work it out, but I think his mind is made up, and maybe he might want you to file for divorce, so he can tell everyone, it was your fault????
2007-01-09 19:57:46
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answer #7
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answered by Anonymous
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you didnt leave enough information, either hes wanting to sneak around without getting caught, this is why he wants you to be in a different location, or he loves you but cant live with you, so he is re-evaluating you and him by spending time alone, he cant live with you but cant fathom the thought of divorce either, so id take my pick from the 2 because there isnt too much grey area,
2007-01-09 19:56:34
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answer #8
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answered by waterboy 4
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Ask HIM what this means. To me, this means he doesn't want to be around you, he wants to be single and screw around, but he doesn't want to spend the money on divorce. If I were you, I would be divorcing his a** and taking half of everything. Call a lawyer.
2007-01-09 19:58:11
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answer #9
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answered by Anonymous
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Maybe he just needs a break, has there been a lot of tension lately? I suggest, if he is willing of course, to get couples/marriage counseling. From there you can communicate to each other about whatever has been going on, and try avoid divorce from that.
2007-01-09 19:54:28
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answer #10
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answered by ~carmie~ 5
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