I just found out today my parents are breaking up. I know it's a fairly common thing and I'm not different than any other child of divorce, but that doesn't make things any easier. I'm angry at my parents...angry at me for being angry at them....I'm just angry at everyone. I dont know what's going on. They never fought and everything seemed like normal, and then all of a sudden they told my sister and I....I don't know.....it's just kind of crazy right now. How the hell am I supposed to deal with this?
2007-01-09 10:46:56 · 8 answers · asked by pookie 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You need to get some counseling.
2007-01-09 10:50:16 · answer #1 · answered by Jack C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, you should know that if they love you, they could be dealing with a ton of guilt for things not working out. While I think anger is a pretty normal response, I dont see where it will help anyone. Start out with letting both of them know you love them. Then talk to them and try to keep the lines of communication as open as possible. I think you could start out by saying exactly what you stated here. Divorce is a very scary thing - for parents and kids alike. I dont know how old you are but there are people you can talk to in addition to parents. School councilors and whoever guides your church can be good sounding boards when you cant talk about it directly with your parents. If either or both of your parents are going through counciling, try to get a session or two yourself... it can be a really good way to understand what you feel and how to deal with it.. Good luck to your whole family.
2007-01-09 11:24:50 · answer #2 · answered by joe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well for one you need not to be mad at your parents. They are divorcing for a reason and I can tell you it's not you or your sister's fault, so get that thought out of your mind. SOme parents just can't stand living with each other when the Love is gone from their marriage. You and your sister need to let your parentrs know that you'll love them and you wish they wouldn't do it, But if they have to you'll are agreement with it. Even if your not. Because why make them feel worse when they are going thrru this. You and your sister just live your lifes like you always have. And if something happens just deal with it. But you and your sister need to grow up faster in life now that you will be going from one parent to the other. But alwasy remember that your parents love you and it's isn't about you'll OK. Need a friend just IM me anytime
2007-01-09 10:59:18 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
the only reason why you never saw them fight is because they did not let you see them fight. just because they are divorcing doesn't mean that they don't love you any less. believe me, me and my younger sister are children of divorced parents. it's not easy on anyone. how are you supposed to deal? well you could write out everything that you are feeling in a journal of some sort. thats what i do when i'm upset at something. i write. writing helps me feel better. or maybe you can vent to a friend that is willing to lend their ear and their shoulder (so you can cry). how else to deal...by taking it one day at a time and by putting one foot in front of the other. hopes this helps. :o)
2007-01-09 11:30:37 · answer #4 · answered by cfalways 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My brother and his wife divorced but they tried to make it as easy as they could on my neice and nephew and we are all friends. I know it's terribly confusing and heart wrenching when parents split, but try to look at it from a different perspective - you will have two homes instead of one. You will hopefully find that your parents make more time for you and they will hopefully be happier individuals. Things are not always as bad as they first appear. Remember that your mother and father both love you and at least they are still alive so you haven't actually lost them. Things could be worse. I still keep in touch with them when it is their turn to stay with their father and I also visit them at their Mother's house. You won't lose aunts and uncles or grandparents if they have an amicable divorce. Try not to worry and don't be afraid to tell your parents what is worrying you or troubling you.
2007-01-09 10:58:00 · answer #5 · answered by Poppy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Minute by minute, hour by hour, day by day. You can be sure that your parents are also going through with you. Be open with them. Tell them what hurts and ask them to help you get through this. You will be just fine. Anger is a normal emotion to have. Read this so article on the 5 stages of grief. It could be helpful to you. Hope you get to feeling like yourself again soon and rest assured everything will be fine sweetie.
2007-01-09 10:51:12 · answer #6 · answered by surfer_grl_ca 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
keep this in mind its not you guys fault parents after being together for so long they do fall out of love and its only fair there alowed to start new lives not without you two it will always have you and your sister involved but you have to be fair and allow your parents to experience love and happinesss they can still be friends just not in love any more
2007-01-09 11:13:43 · answer #7 · answered by treatau 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
remember, your parent are going throught much harder than you.
2007-01-09 10:57:55 · answer #8 · answered by ken401lam 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋