I live in Mississippi and after hurricane Katrina a lot of men came down to work for the construction comapny I work for setting up FEMA trailers. There was this one guy in particular that I had to work with everyday. He was very nice and was really missing his wife and son back home, he had never been away from them. He has been married 10 yrs and had a 9 yr old son. He was very nice to me and we talked a lot, I did not try to hide my attraction for him, but he told me he was very happily married. After about 6 weeks into the job a bunch of us went out and we all got pretty wasted, I had my roomate arrange for him to come to my house to wait for his ride. When we got there I told him I wanted sex and he kept saying no, but after about an hour and his ride was still not there, I guess he finally could not hold out any longer and we had sex. We still talked everyday (we worked together) I did everything I could to make him love me, and when I did tell him I loved him
2007-01-09 09:57:50 · 37 answers · asked by Catina 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
after about 2 weeks of me telling him, he finally admitted he loved me too. We had sex 8 times over the 9 months he was down there. He finally went back to NC to his family. We continued to talk after that until his wife found out, and he told me he loved her...not me and the only reason he kept talking to me was to keep me from telling his wife everything. Dont you think if he spent that much time with me and told me he loved me there was something there between us? Why would he go back if I could give him everything he needed? He even went as far as to go to counseling with his wife and renew their vows. How can he do this to me and then go back to her?
2007-01-09 10:00:53 · update #1
After he told me it was over and never meant anything (which I do not believe) I called his wife and told her everything. Why would he want to be with her, she actually harrassed me by calling me and calling me all kinds of names and leaving messages on my answering machine that if she found out I called her hubby again she would literally hurt me. I have 3 daughters at home and she knows that, she is so immature to leave a msg like that for them to hear. Why would he see me all those months and say it didnt mean anything? Can it be true, or should I keep trying?
2007-01-09 10:03:57 · update #2
Do Inot deserve to be happy? I saw something I wanted and went after it! There is nothing wrong with wanting someone you have fallen in love with to love you back. I am not a bad person.
2007-01-09 10:16:57 · update #3
You basically bullied a man into having sex with you, and are now angry that he does NOT love you. Newsflash, he NEVER loved you and probably thought you were a psycho. The sex he had with you was mercy sex, and since it only happened a handfull of times over a 9 month period, its pretty obvious he was only doing it so that you would get off his back. My advice to you is, GET OVER IT! Learn from your mistakes and recognize that you tried to wreck a home.
2007-01-09 10:04:23 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 10⤊ 0⤋
Honey i don't mean to sound insensitive but the bottom line is you knew that he had a wife and kid at home and him missing them is what he told you right? He at the time told you what he felt as if you wanted to hear at the time to spare your feelings. There's no doubt he might have liked you alot but to love you was something i don't believe he really felt or was confused about. But one things for sure he went back to the place he felt he belong and i hate you got burnt like that but that's the risk you take from messing around with a married man it's just never a good thing to do because feelings are bound to unrival from it. And his wife probably felt if you were bold enough to call her house and she has a son with her husband after you done slept with him then why should she care anything about you and yours. That's just the way it goes when your hurt alot of times you just don't think before you speak and you should have known the consequences behind messing with a married man. And besides all of this he really probably figured after his time was up there he wouldn't have to see you or worry about you anymore. I'm really sorry this happen to you but you really brought it on yourself and you should leave it alone because it's obvious he is were he figures he should be.
2007-01-09 10:20:27 · answer #2 · answered by 2sweet4u 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
there is so much i can say to this my dear. first i'll start out saying that obviously he doesn't love you and he has a responsibility to his family and he loves his wife. is that so hard for you to understand??
what you did is wrong and i hope that you are a god fearing woman because you are in fact going to hell for it. congratulations for ruining what may have been a great marriage for this guy. you prove women can be total *****.
on top of that, friend, karma works in ways that we don't realize until the end. in this life, i do hope that the same **** happens to you and your husband (regardless if you are married or will get married).
yes, i could blame the man as well, but men can't think without their cocks some of the time anyways and getting them drunk proves it. so, yes, you both will enjoy eternity together and i'm sure you'll love it. don't forget to bring some marshmellows and hot dogs when you both head down there.
2007-01-09 10:08:24 · answer #3 · answered by Shakti Svātantrya Isa 4 · 6⤊ 0⤋
You didn't take no for an answer from him so I doubt you will understand what you obviously need to hear.
You are selfish and self-centered! No matter how many words you use to justify what happened there are none that will make you right.
There is not a person alive that deserves what your desires wife has had to endure. You need a good long class in empathy but I suspect if this were to happen to you, you would be the one saying "Why me?".
Get a life...restore your integrity.
2007-01-09 10:35:10 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 6⤊ 0⤋
The question is How could you do that to him? He told you right off he was married for 10 years with a son. He told you he didn't want sex with you. How much plainer could he have said it? Why did you persist.?You got what you asked for. SEX. Shame on you for interfering with a 10 year marriage. He was there to help victims not become one. Not many men have the willpower to turn down free sex when it is shamelessly thrown at him.The guilt you have caused him and the despair to his family is terrible. He owes you nothing. You owe him an apology.
2007-01-09 10:10:12 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 6⤊ 0⤋
When he told you that he loved his wife you should have left him alone. More often than not a man will not give up his family for a fling, and that is all you were to him. You are just upset that your kids will hear the messages and find out that you are trying to be a homewrecker. You should NOT have called his wife. YOU...not she was the immature one!
2007-01-09 10:04:38 · answer #6 · answered by Ryan's mom 7 · 6⤊ 0⤋
Actually you are a bad person. You were in love with someone that was not available, which means you should have left it alone but you didn't. Right there you show you have no respect for yourself, him, or his family. And he saw that, which also told him you are not a person he can trust. Until you realize you did wrong, you wont understand why he went back.
2007-01-09 10:24:39 · answer #7 · answered by Ydua R 2 · 7⤊ 0⤋
First of all I think that women who go after married men after they tell them "I am in a happy marriage" are scum. You should be ashamed of yourself. Of course He's going to go back to his wife because he's made a commitment to her and he was honoring it until you came along. Don't get me wrong I think he is also at fault here and shouldn't have fed you the crap he did but you need to move on. In the future stay away from married men and you won't have to post stupid questions like this.
2007-01-09 10:05:28 · answer #8 · answered by Sara M 2 · 6⤊ 0⤋
what you should have seen is that he's a taken man. Many people want the things they can't have.
You were wrong to have sex with this married man who initially didn't want any involvement. You gave him so many opportunities and he gave in.
Now you probably destroyed his relationship with his family. Don't get me wrong, you're not the only one to blame; it's his fault too.
I would just let him go. There are other men out there. You just need to find him.
2007-01-09 11:17:51 · answer #9 · answered by The Doctor 3 · 5⤊ 0⤋
you are actually deserve worst than what the wife did
if you were an honest person you should understand that you have nothing to offer this man and if you truly Love him as you pretein you should leave him alone
you say she has nothing to give him well what about his son
you have 3 daughter maybe one day they will be lucky enough to meet a man that care for them and how would you feel if that man meet a woman like you
the comment above is me being nice
Now this is truly what I want to say
you deserve to be bit up have someone hold you down open your leg and empty a few bottle of tabasco and other hot sauce in your Va.......na
LEAVE THE MAN AND HIS WIFE ALONE
2007-01-09 10:13:44 · answer #10 · answered by waiting for baby 6 · 4⤊ 2⤋