How do you get along with your ex?

Question

My ex husband and I cannot get along. We have a son together so we have to get along. We seem to get along fine until something comes up that we disagree over and then things get nasty. It is amazing how we can still push each other's buttons. Does it get better with time or is it normal to fight every now and then? Is it also normal to fight like you did when you were married? When we were married my ex always blamed me for things that went wrong - he still does that!

He is with someone else! That is why we divorced. Plus, I never argue in front of my son. He does not need that!

Answer 1

Well honey, after awhile you just start to get tired of it all and learn to choose your battles. Always stand up for what you believe in but sometimes the arguing isnt worth it. It wears you out, so just smile big and nod. My ex and I were the same way , but now we barely even speak to one another. Our youngest is 16 now, so I just let him and his dad work it out anymore. If his dad oversteps his bounderie then I wil step up. Which he used to do alot to see if he could get a rise outa me. Now that he realizes that I dont respond to the negatives, he has learned to leave well enough alone. As far as the blame game is concerned, he will always blame someone other then himself, now some other woman has to put up with that ,not you anymore. Let him blame you, thats his problem and it isnt worth the hassle of trying to correct him because h will never give. Stay strong my friend, this too shall pass.

Answer 2

Just because you are not married anymore doesn't mean he will suddenly decide to take the blame for anything. Some things never change.Some people will not admit they are wrong about anything.I don't think it will get better with time.Unless you learn to accept the blame and know where the blame should be placed.In other words, in one ear out the other. If it isn't important enough to cause problems, let it go.And until you two have some closure with each other you will continue to push the right buttons because you still need to feel like you mean a lot to the other person and anger is the best proof that there is still feelings between you two.Good Luck.

Answer 3

It doesnt get any easier,if anything they get under you skin even more.I cannot stand my ex husband,i wouldnt **** on him if he was on fire,but i get along with my daughters biological father when he come around.There is a big difference between the 2.My ex-husband trys to blame me for everything and is still hung up on me divorcing him for beating the crap out of me,to where my ex-fiance knows that i will jump all up in his crap and get his mother involved.Just do the best you can and choose your battles carefully,and dont ever let on to your kids that there is a problem,because no matter how ya'll feel about each other you are still the kids parents and they love ya'll equaly.

Answer 4

well just let him win each time maybe he thinks its fun to argue with you, be the bigger person when you dont agree on what he says or dose then let him know you disagree then wait until he goes on and on about why you dont and why he dose and why you should just simply ignore him, this will kill the argument, let him know your not changing your mind, and he will realise there is no point in arguing over things. as for blamming you for something simply say "i did not do it" and when he says yes you did ignore him this will also kill that argument lol may even drive him crazy but he wont have a reason to argue and would just leave you alone, and your son dont have to see mommy and daddy fussing all the time, most likely he will see his dad as being a more bigger fuss and you being calm.

Answer 5

Me and my x don't get along at all infact i despies the ground that he walks on. We have children together too. I can forgive for what all he put me through but i cannot and will not for my children. He walked out of their life and didn't look back till he was served with child support paper and no matter how hard i tried to keep him interested in his children he simply was not and didn't hesitate to tell me so.So finially i quite pushing, After he was served with childsupport papers he would pay but only when i would take out a warrent for his arrest. Then he called one day to say that if i didn't stop the childsupport then he would seek visitation after he hasn't laid eyes on them in 7 years. My x also mentioned that he didn't want to see them he just didn't want to pay and the best way to make that stop is to threaten me with reentering there lives. I couldn't sumit my children to a man who didn't want them or had no use for them so i stopped the childsupport. they have had a wonderful father for the last 5 years. My advice is to avoid contact when possiable.

Answer 6

Same as your doing. I was blamed for the weather being bad. It's going on 10 years now since our divorce and he complains to the girls about me at every chance he gets and generally they tell him if he has nothing good to say about me then just don't mention their Mom. I rarely talk to him these days, so I guess it will get better when your son is old enough to see Dad on his own as my girls are now.

Answer 7

Nope things never get better in fact they get worse. I not only get blamed for everything that goes wrong when we have something come up with our kids but he also blames me for the things that go wrong with his and his new wife's life. I wish I didn't ever have to talk to him again but I know as well as you do that isn't a possibility. I guess as bad as we hate to we just need to put a smile on our faces,grit our teeth and bare whatever it is they feel they need to throw out there. I feel for ya sister.

Answer 8

I found it was normal to fight now and then. If there is a child you should try to get along as good as possible for the child. Sometimes this is not possible (as is the case in all relationships).

Answer 9

Just hope he finds someone else, that is when all that will end. Walk off and leave him talking to himself when he starts that, that IS why you got the divorce and your little one doesn't want to keep hearing the fighting. Good Luck to You!!

Answer 10

i'm getting alongside fantastic consisting of his ex. in spite of the undeniable fact that, lately their little ones were very disrespectful in the direction of me for no actual reason. It style of got here suddenly, when we hadn't considered them for months. i'm somewhat suspicious that their mom has some thing to do with it. it truly is weird and wonderful and unhappy.