i'm pregnant should i abort or not?

Question

i'm in a relationship where i feel as though my bf is not giving 100% to our relationship and he's scared of the situation that we're in right now..besides that i dont think i would be able to raise this baby on my own if things don't work out.....on the other hand i don't want to abort this baby because it has a life already...what would you do? what steps should i take to help me decide?

Answer 1

Please don't. Please, think about your beautiful, innocent child. (s)he did nothing to deserve being killed in cold blood.
Please, don't punish him/her for your boyfriend's shortcomings.
Please, just consider this longer before you decide.
Email me, I have a young baby, and I'd love to talk to you about pregnancy/baby stuff.

Answer 2

Ultimately, this is a decision only you can make. Now that you're in the soup, you have to consider your options (and please, don't ever do this again, for the sake of your own sanity). And consider your resources: who can you turn to for help and support?

Here's what you must consider: every baby should be wanted, adored and cherished by both parents. Your BF might be freaked out right now, but if he can't step up and be a man to support you and the pregnancy (for which he is equally responsible), that's one against.

If you are established in a career, you probably have some money saved and you probably have reliable housing, but if you're a student, that's two against. It will be incredibly difficult to finish your program if you have a baby, and children tend to achieve the level of education their mothers reached. So you'd be selling your child short as well as yourself.

Now, you have some information, you have a decision to make. Remember that adoption is also an option on the table.

You are going to have to sit down as objectively as possible and have this discussion with yourself. Make a list of the pros and cons. If you come up very lopsided on one side, consider your alternatives. Look into resources in your area to find out where you can get support.

And then, have this conversation with your BF. You're not in this by yourself. He's just as responsible for the situation as you are, so he should be just as responsible for the solution. If he flakes out and bails, you've still done the research and know your options and resources.

I wish you the best.

Answer 3

the choice is up to you, but let me just tell you, my sister got pregnant when she was 15, she didnt tell anyone about it until the day she had her son, i was living with her and still didnt notice. she was in the same situation that you are in now, the dad was not in it 100% and they ended up breaking up when my nephew was only a few months old, they had been together for about 4 years, things for her were pretty hard, but she got threw them, she graduated from high school and got a really good job, there is hope, its not always bad for everyone. my sister now is 25 and married to someone alot better, she has my 10 year old nephew and a 4 year old daughter and still has an awsome job.

if worst came to worst, keep the baby and give him/her up for adoption, at least give this baby a life instead of takeing it away. we cannot deside for you but just encourage you to do what we feel is right. the choice is all up to you. just because the dads a jerk isnt the reason to abort the baby though. you can get threw it. good luck, i really hope that you keep this baby.

Answer 4

I would def say DONT ABORT! I was adopted and if it wasnt for the grace and love of my mother I wouldnt be here. I know you are scared, but be strong girl! If you do not think that you can support the baby, thats fine~ there are TONS of people that would LOVE to have your baby. You will not regret that. I can tell you that you will be doing a very noble thing~ you will be the reason that that little baby is alive! Give him/her the chance to have a life just like you had. Pray about, God will tell you what to do and He will give you the strength to get through anything. Good Luck~ I will pray for you

Answer 5

I would say ,to talk to someone that you are close to. Someone that knows you. Knows about your life. Maybe, someone in your family. That will also help you after you make this decision. No matter what you will need someone there after this decision has been made. If you decide to have this baby and things change that you are unable to keep this baby then there are a lot of people out there that would love to adopt a baby. My church has 2 families that have adopted babies. So you can try to reach out to your church, if you cant find someone to help you. P.S. this decision should not be made on what the boyfriend is going to do. Only on what you are going to do. Really this is about you and your baby. I think in life this will be the hardest decision you will make. ( I would choose life, but that is me)

Answer 6

This question is only something that you and your boyfriend can decide. Go talk to some docs about your options. Talk it over with family if they know. Abortion clinics will give you options and most won't be pushing an abortion. They leave it entirely up to you and answer any questions you have, give reading information, and help you decide the best decision for you. Talk to some people before making a decision.

Answer 7

No. Your baby does already have life, so it would be murder. If you feel you cannot raise the baby, you could seek the help of your friends and family or give it up to adoption so that someone who feels they can take care of the baby can adopt him/her.

Also, if you abort, you will certainly have some bad psychological effects from it. You will probably feel a lot of guilt when you do it, though it may take years for the rest of the psychological trauma will come, and it will probably hit you when you least expect.

Answer 8

well as far as your bf goes thats not the babys fault he is the way he is. and u say u dont think that you can raise this baby on your own or u may not be ready but there are alternatives to a situation like this, you can choose to have the baby and put baby with a family who loves and wants a baby... i have a 1 yr old and i wouldnt give her up for the world they are precious miracles that we create you know... abortion to me is like killing apart of ourselves during the whole process you know.. just think about it.. good luck....

Answer 9

If it were me, i most definately would NOT abort the baby. you should talk to your parents, your boyfriend, and your boyfriend's parents. Right now, it is normal for you and your boyfriend to be scared, but that is no reason for you to have an abortion!!! you will regret it later. and you wont have to reaise the baby alone, once your boyfriend, if he is mature, gets use to the idea of you bein pregnant, he will come around, And one more thing, if you are old enough and ready to have sex, then you better be ready to have a child, it just comes with it. you made the decision to have sex, so, if i were you, i would let that baby make the same decision when it gets old enough to. don't cut its life short.

Answer 10

Whatever you do, don't abort. There are plenty of families that want to adopt newbornds if you feel that you can't raise the baby. But you're right....the baby already has life. Don't take that away from him/her.

Answer 11

well I can't tell u what to do in this situation, only u know in your heart what u want. i will say that many years ago I had an abortion. I thouhgt about nothing else before going ahead with it, and made a decision which i have never regretted. Im not saying have one, Im saying weigh up your options, make a decision, make sure its the right one and go for it. Never look back in regret whatever u decide