Time to bid Farwell
Ring a bell, well
This would be the last time
Being alive was a crime
So, I am expressing my self in rhymes
Time to bid farewell
We really did make a good pair
Anyway, Take care
I know, Life is unfair
Just remember me in despair
Remember my kiss
That will bring you bliss
I promise,
I hope so,
Now I have to go
Just like the wind blow
I will remember the way you kissed
But I Swear
YOU WILL BE MISSED!!!!!!
2007-01-09 06:33:38 · 19 answers · asked by PheoniX 1 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Philosophy
It's not very good really.
But whats important is that you have released your deepest innermost emotions allowing the world to see exactly whats inside your soul.
2007-01-09 06:38:10 · answer #1 · answered by Bohdisatva 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think is very well made, kinda sad, first part makes me think the person who wrote it wants to commit suicide, and the second part kinda confirms it.... in a way the top part doesnt go with the last, unless what whoever wrote this ment to say a story, althought the top part should be the last part or it would be better in the middle. So it should go like this:
Time to bid farewell
We really did make a good pair
Anyway, Take care
I know, Life is unfair
Just remember me in despair
Remember my kiss
That will bring you bliss
I promise,
I hope so,
Time to bid Farwell
Ring a bell, well
This would be the last time
Being alive was a crime
So, I am expressing my self in rhymes
Now I have to go
Just like the wind blow
I will remember the way you kissed
But I Swear
YOU WILL BE MISSED!!!!!!
sounds better that way... or so I think.
2007-01-09 06:41:32 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
More like a Rap song than a poem ...
anyways ... if you in the following age - groups then these are the following ratings ...
7-10 - Excellent
10-13 - Fairly Good
13-16 - Average
16 - 21- Under Average
21 and above - You should try a few more variables in the poetry ...
2007-01-09 06:38:46 · answer #3 · answered by shukan i 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's pretty good...First of all you spelled Farewell in the first line lol.
some of the time...the rhyming really takes away the strength of the poem
you could try to rewrite it without using rhymes
i always find non-rhyming poems make more of an impact
but otherwise its really sweet
2007-01-09 06:41:38 · answer #4 · answered by bec 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's a nice poem. Anything a person writes that expresses their true feelings is a good piece of material.
2007-01-09 06:42:34 · answer #5 · answered by poetryprincess 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems carelessly written. As much as I like the stream-of-consciousness kind of flow of the poem, I don't think that it bears repeated reading -- it lacks depth.
2007-01-09 07:07:25 · answer #6 · answered by Drew 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, I think it's really good, it sounds like it is a type of sonnet.
Did it take you a very long time to write it?
2007-01-09 07:37:12 · answer #7 · answered by Miriam A. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's ok.
But, not all poems have to rhyme.
Some of the most heartfelt poems have been free verse.
2007-01-09 06:42:20 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
man thats a nice poem you got there. what were you inspired by?
cool poem once again
2007-01-09 06:37:53 · answer #9 · answered by delux191jnz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whoever convinced people that poems are better when they rhyme should be shot dead.
2007-01-09 06:37:18 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋