2007-01-09 05:38:01 · 29 answers · asked by justme 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
just as guilty ????? no , shes the one cheating not u.. the best thing u can do is try at every opportunity u get to show ur dislike of them cheating..but its not ur place to tell their spouse, she will either heed ur warnings , or she will do as she pleases and have to face the consequences of her actions.. but ur not as guilty especially if ur the one trying to get them to listen to reason.. and they just dont care, it wont be from a lack of trying on ur part.
2007-01-09 05:43:39 · answer #1 · answered by brwneyedgrl 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Not just as guilty, but I wonder why you don't disapprove. Your friend is married and having an affair, why don't you think its wrong? Is that marriage so bad than an affair is the only way to go?
2007-01-09 13:43:42 · answer #2 · answered by David L 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Would you let a friend drive when you knew they have had to much to drink? Knowing that they might hurt themselves or someones else. The pain and hurt that would bring to all families involved. Since this woman is your friend, it would be right for you to counsel her and advise her against having an affair, emphasizing everything that she'd be risking.
But under no circumstances should you let her put you in the middle, like being an alibi for her, nor should you ever put yourself in the middle, like telling her husband or otherwise intervening.
Remember that you're not the one putting your friendship at risk either. She is doing that, and she does not appear to care about what that might do.
If you're married put yourself in your husband shoes & he was cheating and his friends knew. You're @ home taking care of the kids while he's out with his friends being suppprtive of him. Are they really his friends if they didn't think & remind him of yours and your kids feeling if this affair was ever found out.
2007-01-09 14:02:21 · answer #3 · answered by WhyNotMe 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You would be guilty if you act like your friend - if you are married and have an affair. If you feel guilty for keeping your friend's secret - that's another story. Anyway, I think that it's none of your business to tell your friend's spouse that your friend is cheating on them.
If you want to have affair/s then don't get married until you are ready for the commitment.
2007-01-09 13:45:09 · answer #4 · answered by vicktop 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think those who do not tell their friends that they are doing anything wrong are doing their friends a disservice.
If I had a friend whose opinion I trusted and they thought I was really screwing up I think they should tell me.
If your friend were robbing banks, would you say something? Of course. Not just because of legal aspects, but because you know it's wrong.
If you are friends with her husband, when (not if) he finds out, and he finds out you knew and didn't say anything, he will hate your guts.
When you stand behind someone who is committing a wrong, you become an accesory. You are not"just as guilty", but why would you stay friends with someone like that?
If she can't even not betray her husband, the man she swore to love and cherish and be faithful to, what makes you think she wouldn't betray YOU if it was convenient for her?
I would NEVER stay friends with someone who was having an affair.
2007-01-09 13:46:23 · answer #5 · answered by fucose_man 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
well if you aren't "disapproving" her then you are doing what ? ???
I think its obvious that you are approving it to some extent...so yes you are guilty (just as guilty as her-not so sure about) but if you know something is wrong/morally unsound then you should say something... If people fail to encourage others to do the right thing more problems in society will happen, not less... not saying anything makes people feel "neutral" but when in fact they are not.
2007-01-09 13:43:06 · answer #6 · answered by Lichen360 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No it's not your fault she is having an affair. My best friend cheated on her hubby and then told him I was the one cheating on my husband. I guess she couldn't come right out and tell him so she told him all the details about her affair and used me as the main character in her story. Needless to say, we are not friends anymore. *****!
If I were you, I'd stay away from dishonest people like your friend. They are selfish and will find a way to pull you into their deceit!
2007-01-09 13:47:05 · answer #7 · answered by Smiles 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I guess it depends on what you mean by "do not disapprove." Do you mean that you just don't say anything? In that case, I would think you're not guilty. Do you mean you cover for him/her? Then I'd say your just as guilty.
2007-01-09 13:50:55 · answer #8 · answered by Sean J 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your married friend having an affair is their business...yours is simply to be a friend....it is not necessary for u to approve or disapprove...just be their friend
2007-01-09 13:51:44 · answer #9 · answered by sunbun 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What would you be guilty of if you don't disapprove?
Guilty of something you don't think is wrong?
Either way, no...you can only be guilty of things you do, not of how you feel about things other people do. I may approve of the Dad who killed his daughter's rapist...but they can't hold me guilty of that crime since I didn't do it.
2007-01-09 13:45:20 · answer #10 · answered by Captain Jack 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes, what type of friend are you? Obviously not one who's willing to keep them straight & narrow toward doing right in his marriage. Now how would you feel if the shoe was on the other foot and he told you to stop cheating. He would be a real friend unlike you are to him.
2007-01-09 13:47:19 · answer #11 · answered by msthinkpositive 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋