TO CUTTERS: why do you guys do it?

Question

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Answer 1

OK, so I added this question to my watch list when I saw it on the home page with the intention to come back and answer it later, preferably after having consumed a fair amount of alcohol. The alcohol thing didn't happen, but I'll try to answer anyway.

I'm not really a fan of the all-caps "to cutters," or the "you guys." I cut myself, but I don't like being labeled a "cutter." Cutting is an unhealthy coping mechanism, kind of like drinking excessively or using drugs. It not my defining attribute. Plus there are so many different reasons that people cut themselves, and it can be a symptom of so many different things, that it doesn't really make sense to lump everyone that cuts themselves into one catagory.

I'm 20 years old, which is a few years older than the "typical" cutter. I started cutting myself during my junior year of high school. I'm now in my second year of college. I went to one of the best private high schools in the area, and I'm now at a competative, nationally known college. I come from a good family, I'm doing well in school, and am well on my way to the career I've wanted to pursue since I was a small child. The point is that most people would consider me "high-functioning," and emotionally healthy. Almost no one knows I cut, and almost no one would guess that I might. I'm definitely not the stereotypical 14-year-old "emo kid" type of cutter.

I'm not sure that I can explain exactly why I cut because I'm not always sure I know why I do it, and it's not always for the same reason, but I'll try... A lot of the time when I cut myself it's because of something silly that I said or did that I was embarased about, something that I'm sure no one else who was there even remembers, but I'll get so angry at myself that the only way to let it go is to hurt myself. It's kind of like a punishment that then once I've done that I don't have to think about whatever it was anymore. Of course, whatever was bothering me always ends up coming back, but it does work for a while.

Other times it was basically for attention, even though no one ever saw the cuts. That was mainly when I was younger. When I'd cut myself, I'd want so much for someone to see it, and I don't even know exactly what I wanted them to do, I just wanted someone, some adult in my life, to notice that something was wrong. That definitely never worked, though, because the next day I'd wake up and put on a long sleeve shirt to make sure that no one could see the cuts.

That doesn't even come close to explaining why I do it, but those are the only two partial reasons that I could figure out how to say.

There are lots of other reasons that people cut themselves that are differnet than why I do it. Some people do it to feel something, because they're so numb from past traumas. Other people do it to distract themselves from the emotional pain the feel, just like if you stub your toe and the slam your finger in the door you forget that your toe hurts. So people (particularly survivors of sexual abuse) do it to make their bodies less attractive to potential predators. For other people it's about control - they feel like they have no control over their lives, and cutting gives them control over their body, and their experience of physical pain. It can also be a way of proving to themself that they're strong enough to do it. Sometimes it is to get attention, particularly among kids who may not be getting much attention at home (maybe because their parents are going through a divorce, a sibling is seriously ill, or their primary caregiver is abusing drugs or alcohol). There are some number of people who cut themselves just to fit in with the "emo" crowd, but these people definitely represent the minority of cutters. The vast majority of the time, there's something behind it other than that the person thinks it's just a cool or fun thing to do.

Answer 2

I'm not one myself, but I understand them. Some of them do it because they need help and the physical pain can make other types of pain go away. It's just like when your head hurts so much and you kick the wall so that your leg starts hurting. And when a stronger pain is rising in a different part of your body, the other pain seems less significant and by concentrating on the new pain, you forget about the initial one. Cutters get rid of emotional pain by replacing it with physical pain. But that's just in some cases, I'm not generalizing.

Answer 3

They do it so they know they are alive. They feel so depressed and numb to the world that feeling the pain of cutting themselves and seeing the blood lets them know that they really are alive. It's a physical release of emotional pain.

More than 1/2 of cutters have experienced sexual abuse in their lives.

Answer 4

Because scars make me look HOT