BREAST FEEDING.DIFFICULTY should I give up trying?

Question

Hi. I gave birth to a wonderful new baby boy on dec. 29th. Since then I have attempted to breast feed but he just won't take to the breast. AT birth I had a c-section and unfortunetly I was unable to breast feed or hold him because of the effects of the anesthesia I ran a really high temp and was just totally out of it! I am still young about 21 years old and I am starting up school (college) again and I just don't have the time. I feel like I'm a failure at this---and I know breast feeding is a way to get the best nutrients. My breasts are almost back to their normal size I haven't pumped them really since the second week from birth. I feel horrible...should I just give up? and would breastfeeding at this current time be pointless? All commentary welcome.

P.S.- IF anyone out there has fed their child via the bottle from birth please leave your experience with that. Was your baby sick more often as a result of not being breast fed? All COMMENTARY WELCOME.

Answer 1

It will be SO WORTH it to keep trying. Trust me! Most moms have a hard time with the first baby. What you need is support. Contact the La Leche league, they are a wonderful source of support and can help on a one to one basis. Also ask your OBGYN for a good Lactation consultant. Lastly if you would like you can email me and I will send you the link to a wonderful group right here on Yahoo!. I know you're young and have a lot going on right now, but in reality breastfeeding is much easier than bottle feeding once you get the hang of it. You can do it! I know people who had a much worse start be successful. Don't give up!!!

Answer 2

My daughter just got her first cold around her 1 year birthday. I breastfed her for 8 months. I had alot of trouble breastfeeding for the first week especially (bleeding nipples, bad latch, etc). I pumped some, but was worried about my supply. After exactly a week of persistence, she decided she was going to latch on the right way and act as if she knew what she was doing all along.

I have lots of experience with breastfeeding troubles, but not so much with refusing the breast. Maybe you could express some near or in baby's mouth?

As far as your supply... I don't know if you have been breast or bottle feeding since birth, but if you are getting any milk, I'd suggest nursing or pumping every 2-3 hours for 10 minutes. Empty breasts make more milk faster. I would guess that you are still at a stage where you can choose which way to go-breast or bottle if you have been nursing at all in these two weeks.

Mom's milk is the best food because of the antibodies from disease, but nutritionally the formulas today are an equal alternative and if you hold your baby close (talk, sing, look into baby's eyes) when you bottle feed, you can have the bonding that goes with breastfeeding as well.

The choice is yours, absolutely. If you think you want to try breastfeeding, though, you have to work at it and be persistent. But also, if you decide you don't want to breastfeed, DON'T FEEL BAD and don't let others make you feel bad. The baby is yours and you have to do what is best for you both.

Answer 3

I was in the same situation. I had a baby boy in June via c-section and that made it very difficult to breastfeed. He lost quite a bit of weight before we left the hospital and the pediatrician had recommended that we supplement with formula. I really wanted to breastfeed so we kept trying, but he would just not latch on well every time. I really struggled with this emotionally... I felt the same way, like I was a failure. I cried all of the time about it, and I think that my son could probably sense the frustration. I did pump, and was lucky enough to be able to pump a ton of milk. We decided that the most important thing to us was that he get the benefit of having breastmilk, even if that meant that I had to pump and feed him out of a bottle. People will tell you that this is a lot of work. It is, but it is also not any more work than having to breastfeed. For me, I was lucky. My son is now almost 7 months old and I have been pumping and feeding him from a bottle since day 1. Once I figured it out that I could pump this much milk, we stopped supplementing with formula. I figured that once I went back to work at 8 weeks, I was going to have to feed him from a bottle anyway....

Bottom line, do what feels best for you. Not everyone can breastfeed and thats ok. Don' t let anyone tell you that it's not. You are not a failure!!!! Keep your head up and all will work out in the end!!!

Answer 4

Don't feel bad. My son had issues breast feeding as well. He didn't take it well and as a result I don't think I ever got a great amount of milk in. I tried for 2 weeks and then just pumped and gave it to him in a bottle. Then my grandma got sick and we spent a lot of time at the hospital and I also had to go back to work. Between all that, I wasn't pumping when I should have and pretty much lost my milk at 8 weeks.

My son has used Good Start with ARA/DHA when he was on formula. He's only got a few colds (which all kids get, breastfed or not) and had strep once. Never had an ear infection or anything major like that. My son is now 14 months old and healthy as a horse. He's in the top 75% for height and 50% for weight and very smart.

If it's not working, switch to bottle, it will be less stressful for both of you and you'll bond much better. You can always try again with your second if you wish. That's what I plan on doing with my second. We'll see if it works.

Answer 5

Breastmilk supply is based on demand - the more your baby nurses (or you pump), the more you will produce. If you haven't been breastfeeding regularly, your supply will have reduced or gone away and it will take some time to build it back up. If you want to try to do this, you'll need to nurse and pump very frequently for a few days. You can nurse your baby first, then supplement with a bottle since you probably won't have enough milk at this point to meet his needs. As your supply increases over time, he will probably take less and less from the bottles and if you get to the point where he nurses and then doesn't want the bottles at all, you'll know your supply is back up to the point where you don't need to supplement anymore if you don't want to. You'll want to be careful, though, that your baby is getting enough to keep gaining weight and avoid dehydration, so in your situation where your supply is reduced, you will definitely need to supplement with formula at first.

This will be very time consuming for a while - at first you'll probably need to nurse or pump at least every 2 hours until your supply starts to increase again.

It would probably be really helpful to call your local La Leche League (a breastfeeding support group) or a lactation consultant. None of what I've told you will help solve your original problem that your baby doesn't want to take the breast, and they may be able to help with that, plus they can provide a lot more information and support than I can in a few paragraphs.

And although I'm all for breastfeeding, lots and lots of babies are formula-fed and go on to lead happy and productive lives. Don't feel horrible, your baby will be fine either way, and you are not a failure. If you want to breastfeed, it is probably still possible but it will take quite a bit of time and effort. If you decide that formula feeding is the best choice for you and your baby right now, I think that's a perfectly valid choice too. The fact that you care so much about doing what's right for your little one shows what a good mom you are.

Congratulations on your new baby!

Answer 6

It sounds like you just stopped pumping recently, and you can probably build your supply back up fairly easily. If you want to continue breastfeeding then just be patient. It takes a while for baby to learn how to do it and for mom to learn how baby does it best. The first few weeks can sometimes seem like the the baby will never get the hang of it and it is a waste of time, but from experience things do get better and easier. It really does just take lots of time, patience, and practice. Also, many breastfeeding mothers get frustrated somewhere around 2-3 weeks when the baby hits a grow spurt. To a nursing mother that hasn't gotten good sleep for a few weeks and is now having to nurse much more often to accomodate the growth spurt it will seem like the baby isn't getting enough milk since they are eating more often. This is when a lot of moms mistakenly think that breastfeeding isn't satisfying thier baby and they need to move to formula.

I'll be quite frank on the going back to school soon thing...Pumping your is no fun. For me it is worth it. I pumped 3 times a day for 12 months with my first and will do the same with my second starting in a couple of weeks.

Answer 7

Breastmilk is the best thing you can give your child and it is a wonderful bonding experience, but it is not easy to do. You really have to make a committment to do it. If you are willing to make that commitment you should see a lactation consultant. Check out the le leche league website and they can hook you up with one. I am pretty sure it is free.
If you are still unable to get you baby to latch on, perhaps you might just pump and give it to him in a bottle. You can revive your milk supply if it is low, by pumping every two hours, drinking alot of water, and eating the right foods. You can also take fenugreek (herb you can get at any healthfood store) to boost your supply.
Anyway, to answer the other part of your question - my 9 month old has been feed breastmilk and formula and she hasn't been sick yet. For the first 4 months, it was only breastmilk, then we supplemented with formula because I couldn't get my supply up.
Some breast milk is better than none. I highly encourage you to keep trying.

Answer 8

No you shouldn't give up, unless that is what you want to do.

However if you are determined to breastfeed you will be able to succeed. However if you are going back to classes and will not have the opportunity to pump then you may end up not being able to in the long run. Some women have and easier time pumping than others,and some can go longer without pumping/feeding than others.

It is all dependant on how much effort you are willing to put into it. I am not going to lie it may not be easy.

The first thing you need to do is see a lactation consultant or La Leche League leader. Lacation consultants may or may not be free/covered by insurance. The La Leche League is free and often leaders can spend a whole day with you to really work it out. Once you have the baby latching you will have to spend a lot of time feeding to get your supply back up. You may need to use a supplimental nursing system for a time. You also may need to pump between feedings to build up a supply.

You will also need a pump most likely. WIC and other organizations will give you one for free if you qualify. Otherwise you will need to buy or rent one.

You can also exclusively pump if you are not willing to work on getting your baby to breast. This can be done though it hard work. Combining all the inconvenience of bottle feeding with the added inconvenience of pumping. However I know some moms who have done it.

You need to assess what is going to work for YOU. You aren't a failure if you just can't do it. It is hard enough being a mom and in school. However the time you spend nursing, quiet and snuggly can be the most precious time with your baby.

Answer 9

Kinda sounds to me like you dried up? Maybe from not breast feeding at first and then not pumping since a few weeks ago. That could be what's wrong. There's nothing there and the baby is getting frustrated by not getting anything.

If your not comfortable doing it, just use the bottle. I did breast feed all 4 of mine, but not for that long. Only a few months each. At least that way you can be sure of what your baby is getting. It's not a crime to bottle feed. You still get to hold and snuggle with them while they are feeding. That is what is important.

Good luck to you and happy mothering!

Answer 10

I bottle fed my first and he had ear infections all the time I don't know if it was from bottle feeding but he did and my second I breastfed for 1 month and she has so far not been sick If you have a pump you should see how much you have. Or you could breastfeed him and then after top him up with a bottle. It is totally up to you whether you keep breastfeeding or not it is just not for some people.