Lot of people would say leave him - not so easy he is my all. and he asked me to marry him. And yes we have had sex - more than ones and i might be pregment now.
2007-01-08 20:41:16 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Yeah I know how it feels. He's your everything and you want to give him another chance so bad right? Maybe he'll change? Maybe he wont do it again? He will. If he dosent, I give him props! More power to him! You have to look at the reality hunny...Every time he loses his temper, you suffer for his actions? It's just not right. You might be pregnant? Thats a decision you have to make on your own.Its your responsibility. You need to ask yourself questions like ''Am I ready for this baby? Can I support him if worst comes to worst?''.Those are questions you have to ask yourself before you make a big decision like this.I dont condone abortion! But I have had one myself.I dont believe in bringing a baby to this world to make it suffer if you are not mentally and physically prepared.Then again you could give it up for adoption and thats better because you give life to a being :) and its beautiful. But back to you sweety, if he has a short temper chances are he isnt going to change.You need to get out while you can! Before this escalates you need to think about what you're going to do. He asked you to marry him...yeah..thats beautiful, but if he wants you to marry him he has to change his ways.Marriage is about love and owning up to the vows...he cant mistreat you! It's wrong. I cant change your mind, but you can think of all the possibilites and see where this relationship might be heading.Think of the worst that could happen.Dont try and blind yourself from the truth. Best of luck babygirl. You can contact me for support at Nycz_Most_Envied_Mami@Yahoo.com
2007-01-08 21:53:44 · answer #1 · answered by ♥ Loving My Babyboy ;) ♥ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He can only change if he wants to change. You can't cjange him. Tell him that his temper outbursts are unnaceptible to you. Better now than later. Imagine yourself 5 years later - married to him, hurt by him and your future child may be hurt by him as well. Act now to prevent it. Sadly, abusers don't change - they remain abusers.
Why are you getting yourself into this mess? He asked you to marry him - is that a good enough gift to accept? Big deal he asked you. You deserve better. Noone deserves to be hurt and slapped. You say you love him, but it sounds like you love the wrong person. Guys are not fixer-uppers, they are people. Love him the way he is, not his potential. If you find it hard to love him (and you should!) don't hope that he will change. So what you had sex - you can find a lot more sex somehwere else where you are not slapped.
2007-01-08 21:32:42 · answer #2 · answered by Everybody's Favorite 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When anything has anything to do with the subject of love nothing is or will be easy! Your dudes temper problem will only become worse and more volatile, making the damage he does to you more severe hence more painful. A man should never hurt you either mentally emotionally, and/or physically. But that is not what gets me... this is what gets me...
You might be pregnant, correct? Why on earth would you endanger your unborn this way by putting yourself in harms way? Why would you want a potentially dangerous man near your child at all? Look, you seem like a sweet sensible girl and you know what is the right and best choice, so make it. Again I ask you only I'm re-wording the questions using hypothetical worst case scenarios ... Would you leave your baby girl with a baby raper? Would you continue to stay if i were to tell you in a fit of rage your lover made you miscarry by kicking you in the stomach at 7mo pregnant, and you deliver a still born(dead baby)?
now try this imagine 5-10 years down the road or so, ok ..., how are you gonna feel when your daughter or son has to watch their daddy beat and hurt their mommy; or worse yet, what if he starts to hurt your kids using them as a method to control you. What then?
I know these things that I mention above horrify you as they do me, but the reality of this is these type scenarios happen daily. Innocent women and children are subjected to disbelieving grossly terrible acts of cruelty and malice, keep in mind not one of them was deserving of the punishments enacted upon them forcefully, nor did one ever think they would allow another to treat them or their children this way at all.
I understand your duress, but it isnt unheard of to be a single mother doing it all by herself, I did. I am a single mother of 1 and I'm not going to lie to you it wasn't easy but everything turned out for the good of things.
If by chance you decide to stay make him go to counselling! I DON'T believe he'll change but him attending counselling sessions is better than not doing any kind of intervention at all.
I hope you will see what the right decision is and then follow through with the right decision. All it takes is for you to know and trust the fact based on this, YOU DESERVE SOMEONE WHO DOESN'T HURT YOU, period!
I cannot think or even fathom the idea that you would knowingly put your innocent unborn child in harms way or even consider staying. So, in a nutshell I agree with the probable majority rid yourself of him now. The brutality down the road will be worse, make no mistake. I believe you to be rather young and impressionable, so let me leave this impression upon your mind, GET RID OF THIS GUY HE IS A DANGER TO YOU AND YOUR BABY!!!!!!
2007-01-09 00:42:12 · answer #3 · answered by chynamist02 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like u already have the answer and yet u r fearing to take steps.. let me tell u once someone hits u once, he will always hit u again n again. There is this song of eve where a gal is hit by the hubby n she keeps goin back in the name of love.in the end she is beaten so much n dies.. so my dear, Watch out n fllow what ur mind tells you... (dont follow ur Heart)
2007-01-08 23:05:31 · answer #4 · answered by aasweet 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is easy you are and will be an a abusive relationship even more so if you marry him you don't need or deserve that kind of treatment from anyone and if you are pregnant think of what can happen with a child involved. if we cannot convince you here you need to go talk to a counselor asap. for your sake and maybe your life get out of this relationship now.
2007-01-08 22:14:24 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Once he hits you and you don't leave. It will never stop. It will get worse much worse.
2007-01-08 22:14:59 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
RUN AWAY...NOW!!!! If he hurts you, he may also hurt your baby...and would you REALLY want your child to watch its mother being slapped around by its dad??
2007-01-08 20:46:32 · answer #7 · answered by koreateacher96 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it will only get worse its called domestic violence if this is what you want then yer sure go ahead and marry him
2007-01-08 22:16:31 · answer #8 · answered by trcyhanna 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to change him.
2007-01-08 21:37:01 · answer #9 · answered by kirthi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he is not suiting you, just look for others, like me
2007-01-08 20:46:53 · answer #10 · answered by shiva k 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋