if one of my friends is trying to commit SUCIDE what should i do?

Question

im 16 (male) and one of my friends he's also a dude, he told me he is going to commit sucide because he is gay, and he thanked me for being his friend. Is there anything i can do???

Answer 1

He needs to help urgently, try getting him to ring the samaritans for help

http://www.samaritans.org.uk/

Answer 2

It is true that a lot of people who talk about contemplating suicide, don't actually go through with it...however SOME DO! You cannot afford to take that risk!

Try and put yourself in his shoes...

He is obviously deeply hurting and depressed and you must be one of his closest friends. He has confided in you and is asking for your help (whether on a subconsious level of not).

I recommend having a good talk to him...

Make sure it's at a time convient to him, in a place where he will be comfortable and away from other people who may overhear the conversation. Let him know how much you value his friendship regardless of his sexual preference. Remind him of all of his great qualities and inform him that he has the right, as a human being, to be exactly who he is.

Make sure that you also ask for help from someone else. I would inform his parents/guardian - not in a taddle tale way, but out of genuine concern. I would also contact a help line - or something of that sort for more advice on how you can help.

But most importantly - just be there for him....and make sure that he knows it. Be supportive of who he is and be willing to just listen to him...even if you don't know how to respond. Obviously, you're not him...so you will have no idea how he feels (and thats ok) but he may just need someone to talk to, that will really listen to him. Im sure that's something he would REALLY appreciate and probably something he needs.

Also, if you know any other gay people, maybe you could introduce him to them. They may be willing to offer their wisdom or advice on how they "came out" and coped with it. Or if you know of any gay groups and are feeling adventurous - maybe you could offer to accompany him while mingling with people that he can relate to and who may help him feel more accepted.

Well, I hope that I have been of some help - However I am not a professional (just someone who has had their own struggle with depression) So, please!!! - Seek out some professional help!

Good luck - I hope he feels happier soon :)

Answer 3

TELL HIS PA|RENTS! I am 27 and still struggling with my sexual orientation. THinking i was gay caused me to fall into a DEEP deppresion and i'm still taking antideppressant medicine. I also was convinced that if i was gay i didnt want to live and tried suicide 2 times. He's not kidding. That was 6 years ago, and time heals everything. He is so ooverwhelmed right now with this but in time he will reach a point where if he is gay he can handle it and wont want to die. He will realize that being gay isnt who he is just a smal part of him. He might not even be gay could just be confused and will realize hes straight. Tell his parents immediatly, we still live in a world where you are treated like garbage if you are gay so it can be very difficult to accept that you are homosexual. People forget we are people first, and remember your friend is EXACTLY the same person he was before he told you he was gay so treat him like that. I don't know if i'd tell his parents the gay part that could put your friend over the breaking point and really make him try to kill himself, but definitly go to them and say that he told you he is going to try to kill himself. Again, he isnt looking for attention, he isn't bluffing, he wants to be straight and if he isnt then he doesnt want to live, he WILL tryt o kill himself, so help him now b4 its too late. Imean tell his parents in the next day. Gay ppl arent like the stereo types you see, most of us are just normal sportsloving, videogamepalying guys. look where i found this question at, lol, in the basketball section while i was browsing the hoops questions. Being gay is like 1% of who i am.

Answer 4

Just be there for him & say what u feel. being gay is no reason to kill ones self. I have been around the life style all my life. It does not bother me. what is funny is have-ing very long hair{ the girls love running their fingers through it} & have a couple of guys give the whistle. Then i turn around to say thankz & they do not know what to say. or be out to a club w/a couple of female freinds,sitting at a table & some guy taps me on the shoulder to ask me to dance. it is hard not to laugh but that would to rude as well as asking 4 a fight to ensue. So i decline as polite as possible. I f this guy was really serious he would not say anything & just do it. right know he is fishing for responces. So mke sure he gets plenty. not the standard kind either. leave the parents,the clergy & the school out of it. get some of his gay freinds to help as well as straight. plus some female freinds as well. Just make sure he knows that as long as he has freinds he call rely on then lifes short come-ings can be over come.

Answer 5

this question should be in the friends and family section. however as others have said (i will not repeat the organisations listed) contact them. give the numbers and information to your friend. (if it is your friend and not you yourself)
whatever and whoever it is considering suicide if they were serious they would have attempted to comit already. so it is more a cry for help without saying Please help me.
as for him being gay so what no one is perfect. I'm a straight guy who adores women. but i firmly believe that everyone should live their life their own way. what is right for one person is not for someone else.
just get your frind to speak to someone at one of the organisations others have listed.
hopefully your friend will come to understand that being gay is no reason to kill yourself, despite what some small minded individuals and organisations might say.
all you can do is be there for him and listen without judging him hor his lfestyle. remember there are lots of famous gay people around and trust me they have made millions of dollars, ok some of them tried to hide being gay others were open about it. ultimately we now know and always suspected most of the known gay celebrities were different in one way or another.
so as i said sit down wioth your friend ask him to tell you his reasoning behind him wanting to commit suicide he has to have more reasons besides just being gay. just sit listen and say you can understand his reasons but he should talk to a professional such as the samaritans for example. good luck

Answer 6

Yes - you must tell his parents or an adult you trust. A counselor at school would be good. When people are telling others that they are going to commit suicide it is usually a cry for help. You will be helping him.

And I say thank you also - for being his friend.

Answer 7

People that say they're going to kill themselves generally don't. It's a negative attention seeking behavior.

I wish I had a dime for every time someone has threatened to kill themselves and not done it...I'd be rich!

It's the ones that don't TELL anyone they're going to do it that actually carry it through.

Tell him to quit being such a drama queen and get with the program....and to get over himself.

Answer 8

Talk him out of it.
Tell his parents (about the suicide, not the gay).
Tell the school counselor.

Telling others might disrupt the friendship, but so will this guy's death.

Here are some suicide hotlines. I recommend you call them for advice that could help your friend.
http://suicidehotlines.com/national.html

http://www.hopeline.com/

http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/

Good luck to both of you!

Answer 9

maybe posting something important like this belongs elsewhere than a basketball forum.....just a thought.

but hey while here how about a little gay joke? try this, make your buddy laugh, and he'll want to live...

Q:what's the difference between a gay guy and a refridgerator?
A:the fridge doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.




good day.

Answer 10

Yes, talk to a couselor at school. People who say that sort of thing are asking for help in a round about way.