I've started to realize that I may be attracted to emotional pain and hurt. I find that I put myself into situations where I will be hurt emotionally.
For example, I tend to crush on straight guys constantly and guys who can't and won't reciprocate those love and affection. i've thought about it a lot and i think that a part me secretly digs getting hurt and beat up on.
Are these feelings typical? do you think that i should be worried about this?
2007-01-08 16:33:06 · 8 answers · asked by Venus Mantrap 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I don't think you should be too worried about this. A lot of people find themselves needing pain, but for most of them they can never consciously admit it to themselves. I think your very smart for seeing and understanding this side of yourself. Since you can see this I think you are more likely to find a relationship that will satisfy your needs in that area because you are no longer blind to the fact that its there. I believe you will eventually find someone that can bring out that side of you in a way that will benefit the both of you.
2007-01-08 16:54:35 · answer #1 · answered by katchoo_792 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think its a STRESS thing and you've just gotten adjusted to it being in your life. AND YES, IT IS ADDICTIVE. Its like having a family member that constantly complains or bit*hes. Their looking for their adrenaline or fight fix. It also gets OLD for the rest of the family.
You have a psychological condition IF you are indeed attracted to emotional pain and being abused. Especially someone as attractive as you inside. From your Lists you obviously have a romantic heart and that means that pain is not something that leads to a happy ending :// You deserve better, as everyone does!
Pride & Prejudice, The Princess Bride, Little House on the Prarie, The Crucible (a real story of unfairness - but was basically written about the McCarthy Era but based on the Salem Witch Trials), etc. That doesn't sound like anything but GOOD.
I have the feeling that growing up as a Mormon (I grew up as a Jehovah's Witness) colored some of your world. Feeling like perhaps no matter what, you would never, EVER be worthy of your God. I know that's how I felt. I even went overboard for 14 years and spent 45 hours a month trying to prove my love, however in the end, I finally accepted myself and have been HAPPY ever since. I hope YOU can do the same too! Your young, take advantage of that and stop picking the emotionally and physically unavailable ones! Give your love to someone WORTHY of you, and trust me a young guy out there, much like you is out there. YOU CAN'T BE THE ONLY ONE in that area! And remember YOU ARE WORTH AND WORTHY OF LOVE! I'm sure your BFF tells you this. . . listen! You trust her for a reason!
2007-01-09 01:13:50 · answer #2 · answered by AdamKadmon 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well if you crush on straight guys, that may also be a safety net. These guys will never give you a feeling of rejection because it won't go anywhere. You may just be attracted to certain attributes of the straight man that you haven't found in gay men around you.
Either way I hope that you find something out there that will make you happy. Do not get down on yourself about liking someone and possibly getting hurt. It makes ya human.
2007-01-09 00:46:50 · answer #3 · answered by The Gay Argentian Seal 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems like you are emotionally masochistic:
masochism, is the sexual pleasure or gratification of having pain or suffering inflicted upon the self, often consisting of sexual fantasies or urges for being beaten, HUMILIATED, bound, tortured, or OTHERWISE MADE TO SUFFER, either as an enhancement to or a substitute for sexual pleasure.
You did not describe any sort of sexual need to be hurt, but you did describe an emotional need, which I would call emotional masochism.
Masochism is not normally a problem unless it begins to affect your daily life in negative ways. If it IS making daily life difficult for you, then it's best to go to seek a therapist. If not, then you just need to be aware of what you are doing.
2007-01-09 00:44:59 · answer #4 · answered by Rabbityama 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Huh . . . .? Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that you were talking about me! lol
With me, the problem was that God was trying to get my attention. And I still don't fit in, Christians find that I am Bisexual, abd Gays find that I am Christian. Oh well. I guess that I have a lot of time to spend with God!
Besides all that, I find that I am more attracted to women, except for sometimes.
Just try to focus on what you think that you REALLY should be doing.
2007-01-09 00:53:11 · answer #5 · answered by Christian Sinner 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
well, for one i'd suggest doing some fine tuning to your gaydar. also, sometimes after admitting and coming out as to what you are can make u feel like you should be punished because of what others percieve our type to be. i'd suggest either talking to a therapist, close family member (one who can relate), or a counselor or psychologist.
2007-01-09 00:45:21 · answer #6 · answered by D-Fox 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You may be gay, but you are still a man. Act like one sweetie. However if you like the pain so much, why are you complaining about it??? - Voodoo
2007-01-09 00:39:23 · answer #7 · answered by Voodoo 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I'd be a little worried if I were you. Maybe you should talk to a professional.
2007-01-09 00:45:49 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋