I am 24 yrs old and have been married 4 yrs.The relationship is not stable we are off and on more off than on.We fight all the time and cant agree on anything least of all on how our daughter should be raised at this point.We needed a marriage therapist to help us decorate our old home!I was a model and he was a photographer a match made in hell!We seperated after i gave birth to my daughter when she was not quiet 1.She is know a little over 2 yrs old.I have been travel with her for work to just about every where even to south africa! I think his reason for wanting to see his child is because i have started the paper work for divorce and have started seeing someone else?He has not seen her since he left me.No child support either!
2007-01-08 12:33:27 · 10 answers · asked by Miranda W 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He wants to visit her at the expense of my schedule and wants to take her back with him to his native London for his visits i do not trust him at all.I want nothing to do with him is their away around this?
2007-01-08 12:38:57 · update #1
He has never even taken an intrest in his daughter till now!
2007-01-08 12:42:30 · update #2
Has anything happened in his life that would make him realize he has a daughter and makes him want to take care of her? Make sure you know his real reasons before you start judging. Doesn't seem like he ever cared about her, but in any case, he still is the father and has rights.
Good luck with your divorce and best of luck with your new relationship.
2007-01-08 12:41:43 · answer #1 · answered by Miss T 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are many diff. angles....Have you filed for child support? If you 're traveling a lot maybe he thinks $ isn't needed. Be careful...if the divorce gets nearly as messy as you say the marriage was, he will use the travel against you by saying it is unstable. How old is he? You're still young and hot with a lot going for you and you're moving on......what does he have? Was getting preg. a mutual idea or did he see it as a way to trap you that backfired....or maybe he ended up feeling trapped. Step back from the picture and take an honest look @every detail...you may not want to admit certain things or even like what you find out ...but it may be necessary to evaluate things in the best interests of your daughters' future.
2007-01-08 20:59:49 · answer #2 · answered by Debbie S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In most cases i would say let him see her if he wants. But to me it sounds like he didn't want to see her until you had someone else in your life. I would be very careful letting him take her. He could take her and not give her back and there isn't a whole lot you can do about it. You have to go fight it out in court which can take months. (personal experience.) A lot of times even if you have custody and he would take off with her the only way to her her back is through the court. Not even the local police will help. They ill tell you that it is a civil order and you have to take it to court to get her back. It's not like that everywhere but in most places I'm sure. And if he isn't paying child support why should her see her??? Just because he doesn't want to help raise her financially doesn't mean she stopped needing things. Clothes new shoes , etc. And you can get child support before you are divorced. Maybe you should try to file temporary emergency custody just in case. I would seriously think about trying to find somewhere and settling down with your daughter though. She's getting older and she is going to need a stable home life , especially if mom and dad aren't together.
Hope that helps!!
2007-01-08 20:58:13 · answer #3 · answered by Darkchylde 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it very well may be true that he just wanted to start seeing your child because you are filing for a divorce. the reason behind this is probably because it slapped him into reality and he wants to start seeing his child before he loses the child too. as far as support ask for it and if he does not start helping ask for it in the divorce. he is still the father and still has to pay for his child
I would not let him take the child anywhere until after the divorce and then he will only be able to take the child within whatever state you live in without a kid napping charge. wait until the divorce is final
2007-01-08 20:42:27 · answer #4 · answered by Jamie G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just because you're divorcing your husband,that doesn't mean
he does not have a right to see his child,so what if he doesn't give you child support,he's still your childs father,you and him
can work out the child support,if not let the courts do it,but it's not fair for you not to see his child, my ex-husband still does not do what he's supposed to do for our son,he's 15, I've had to take care of him all by myself,but I never stopped him from seeing our son, If you do your son will hate you for not letting him see his father,so get your divorce, but don't keep in form seeing his son
2007-01-08 20:51:32 · answer #5 · answered by msalb 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop the pity party, be glad he wants to see her. That is life when you have a child BOTh of you are parents for life, it is not up to you to choose that or to try and influence your kid to not see him. She has enough to deal with without this type of nasty behaviour.
Be the bigger person and let him see her, if the details around the visits bother you make sure you are clear with the lawyer that it has to be at his expense... that is what you pay lawyers to sort out.
Do not stop your daughter seeing her father...it will backfire on you later in life.
2007-01-08 20:45:39 · answer #6 · answered by Marmitemonster 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
continue with the divorce. No matter what his reasons are for wanting to see his daughter, he has the right. That being said, men like that are scum, tell him he is either to be in his daughters life or out.
2007-01-08 20:43:23 · answer #7 · answered by Lovebug123 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe that your suggestion is right. A man does not know what he has, (or in your case had), until someone else appreciates it, like your new man. I wouldn't bother with him. He wants to see his child but not assist in her support as he is responsible for. Go on with your life for now. When the time is right allow him to be in your child's life. But keep him out of yours.
2007-01-08 20:46:40 · answer #8 · answered by LadyJ 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
okay. you are complaining because he is trying to be an active father. why? if you started on the divorce, then the whole child support order hasn't taken into effect yet. but it will. but that still doesn't give you permission to withhold his daughter. don't be selfish. let your daughter have her father. she is entitled to it.
2007-01-08 20:40:37 · answer #9 · answered by Bella 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
file for full custodian. thats the best thing you could do. reason been what you have already told us. he lives miles away.
2007-01-08 20:44:02 · answer #10 · answered by Bex 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋