Here's one...you are waiting with some other applicants to interview for the same job. Can you write ....?

Question

an amusing paragraph or 2 or more that includes these phrases?
1. Ha ha...no seriously...WHAT?!
2. I really don't think that your imitation of Gomer Pyle is going to win you this job.
3. Let's not. Let's not. What's the word......let's not PANIC!
4. I KNEW I should have worn the blue suit.
5. Yes...I can keep a secret.
6. Can I BE sweating any harder?

Answer 1

I have been unemployed for close to three months. Initially being home was refreshing as I got to stay up late, do some household projects that have been on my “to do” list longer than I care to remember and just generally be lazy. It was even more fun when the state decided that I could indeed collect their small pittance of an unemployment check even though I had been fired from my last position. Yup, I got fired! I was the Senior Buyer for a medical device company and one day I just decided I didn’t want to go back there. I couldn’t stand my boss, the work or the commute. So one night after everyone in my department left, I cleaned out my desk and never looked back and I must say it felt good. However, the full impact of this hasty decision is beginning to sink in. I have bills to pay therefore I have to go back to work and start getting a decent paycheck as I can’t survive on the check from the state.

As anyone who has ever been on unemployment can tell you, it’s a requirement to look for work if you want to continue to collect that unemployment checks. It was through the Employment Development Departments web site that I found a local company that was looking to hire a Senior Buyer. Apparently they think I might have some potential as today I have a real live interview with four people at the Eden Medical Device company.

I arrived at Eden 10 minutes before my scheduled interview. I was placed in a small room with 3 other people and started talking with a young man no more than thirty years old. When I asked him what position he was interviewing for he told me “Senior Buyer”. “Ha ha…no seriously…What?” I snickered. I knew from the phone interview that there was only one Senior Buyer position open. He again repeated “Senior Buyer”. “I really don’t think that your imitation of Gomer Pyle is going to win you this job” I purred. The man looked like he was on the threshold of tears, got up and moved across the room.

I moved to where the two ladies were sitting and introduced myself. Hello I said sweetly, my name is Christine Brown. I’m interviewing for the Purchasing Manager position I lied. What position are you interviewing for I asked them. The younger of the two said they were both interviewing for the Senior Buyer spot. “Oh, isn’t that terrific, one of you will be my employee” I said. Of course I thinking “Lets not. Lets not. What’s the word…lets not PANIC” as long as neither of them go into the interview and say anything about me no one will know about what I am doing out here. The second older lady stood up and said that she would be happy to work with me, came over and introduced herself as Maggie Jenson and proceeded to give me her resume. Maggie was dressed very professionally and right then I KNEW I should have worn the blue suit.

Maggie smiled at me and asked me if I could keep a secret. “Yes…I can keep a secret” I state. She got close to my ear and whispered “I know there is no opening for a Purchasing Manager at this time”. “If you think you’re going to chase me away you have another thing coming”.

Can I BE sweating any harder I wondered. The side door opened and Maggie was called for her interview. She said good bye and walked by with a confidence that I was surely lacking. Shortly thereafter the other two candidates were also called away. When it was finally my turn, I really didn’t know what to expect. The lady I was sitting in front of gave me her card and it identified her as the Director of Purchasing. She said that she had one question for me. “Did I really tell the other Senior Buyer candidates that I was interviewing for a Purchasing Manager Position and that one of them would be my employee”? “Yes” I admitted without offering any explanation. “You’re just what I want someone who will shake things up a little – when can you start” she asked.

Answer 2

I even have consistently questioned why interviews are certainly one of those appropriate technique? I propose, the guy who gets the activity will no longer be so formal and frightened (because of the emphasis on "being on terrific behaviour") while he gets settled in to the activity, so why have him sit down there at his terrific habit for the interview once you will anticipate him to be comfortable and "everyday" if he gets the activity? seems to me that interviews could desire to be the thank you to get to comprehend the guy who is going to be working for you, no longer the guy who's attempting like hell for at some point to be "expensive Abby's" poster baby. If i replaced right into a chairman interviewing potential workers, i might take them to lunch at a hectic cafe, with out telling them first (to choose their preliminary reaction to surprising exchange), and demand that the interview be carried out in clever casual dresses. and then i might confer with them approximately each and every thing however the activity. after all, i might purely interview the individuals whose resumes stood out besides.

Answer 3

yes if you don't want to be accepted/ hired.
and possibly never be accepted/hired