My husband walked out on me and the two kids, 3 and 7, for another woman. The friends immediately began to invite him and the other woman to events. No, I am not a horrible person and they express sympathy but still support him with their friendship and acceptance of what he has done. I have seen this before. If a wife leaves the husband for another man, she is a huzzy and excommunicated from the group, "Poor poor John, good riddance for the witch." I don't get it. Is it just sexism, pure and simple? And the woman are the worst offenders.
2007-01-08 07:50:41 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Maybe they just get mad at you for repeat posting.
2007-01-08 07:52:13 · answer #1 · answered by fucose_man 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
If they are his friends it's not shocking at all. People take the easy route and don't want the responsibility of doing what is right. If they made friends with you after the divorce, they would have to admit that they knew things, saw things etc. and would have to take up for you And your kids. People just don't want to do that in today's society of selfishness. I bet he is a party goer and has a lot more time than you do because of the kids; he does not have to take them or will talk about them etc. Sorry about the situation, but it is better to make a new set of GOOD friends who can relate to you and your situation, support you, be there for you, not kick you when your down.
2007-01-08 07:57:25 · answer #2 · answered by cateyes 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can relate to that situation. People do not want to get involved. They don't want to stand up for what is right and wrong. The one that leaves is the good old boy who parties. And the one left doing all the work is no fun. You are too tired taking care of the home and family. They also don't want to admit that who they call their friend is a real jerk. You will forgive them the jerk will give them grief. Get new friends, those were only fair weather friends, you need people during a divorce.
God Bless and Good Luck
2007-01-08 08:16:21 · answer #3 · answered by springer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It does not matter what happened between you and your husband, they were friends before you got married so they will stay friends after your divorce - why are you surprised?
your friend will do just the same, will it change anything for them if you decide to get married for second time, or just go out with somebody, of course not!
Don't get angry at anybody, just try to stand up and leave the memories, you are just having hard time because of divorce and are looking for reasons to feel unhappy and angry. Don't do that, it's bad only for you!
2007-01-08 08:17:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have no ideal what he has told these people.....if you feel this way - I would not call them friends and not want to even be with them. Find another source for comfort and try to focus on getting past what is going on.
What you are going through is very painful and I would be focusing on your children and a NEW LIFE without a person like that treating you that bad.
It's a new year - the new year for YOU!
2007-01-08 07:57:34 · answer #5 · answered by WhatNext 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personally I think it must be you since your opinion isn't fact based....
or maybe the choice of friends you had, those who still like your ex-cheating husband, be glad since some of those friends were instrumental in your husbands behavior.....
last one - the women friends would rather have the ex-cheating guy around than you since men love to come to the rescue of women hurting..... again, new friends needed...
2007-01-08 08:03:16 · answer #6 · answered by D. 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This happened to me....the guy, and I asked my friends the same question.
Their answer: I didn't ask them to choose sides by constantly talking about my ex, the break up, who was doing what all the time. She was always trashing me to our friends and they got tired of hearing it all the time.
Best advise I ever got from my dad "Never talk bad about folks".
2007-01-08 08:00:22 · answer #7 · answered by open_phunguy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whenever two people get divorced, their friends are forced to take sides and usually it comes down to siding with whomever they were first friends with. In other words, if your husband was close to these people prior to meeting you, they're most likely going to stick with him. If you were close to certain friends, they would stick with you.
2007-01-08 08:04:45 · answer #8 · answered by Rachel 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's friendship. Just get a few of them and you can turn the sides.
2007-01-08 07:57:31 · answer #9 · answered by That's me ... 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WHAT!!! My husband left me and our son for another woman and I'd be DAMNED if my friends invite his a.ss or his bit.ch anywhere!!!!!
Your friends are INSENSITIVE and NASTY.
I don't know about sexist but it sure is hurtful. The moment one of their husbands leaves them, invite his as.s over for tea and call her to let her know how "hurt and confused" he is.
GET NEW FRIENDS!!!!!
2007-01-08 08:12:42 · answer #10 · answered by Lotus Phoenix 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋